Tim Kern profile picture

Tim Kern

They say when you're psychotic, that you never walk alone...

About Me



This profile was edited with satanspace.com Editor

Rotten Carnie Bastard. Black Eye Specialist. Prestidigitator. Future Serial Killer. Neurotic Obsessive-Compulsive. Insomniac. Collects dolls and body parts.All pieces are custom designed for the persons wearing them, so please don't copy. If you'd like a consultation or to make an appointment for a tattoo, please email me here, since I am no longer working at Last Rites Tattoo Theatre. I am in the process of opening a new private studio with Liorcifer, and Dan Marshall in NYC. We are still here, despite rumors to the contrary.

*Due to my hectic travel and appointment schedule, I'm not taking on NEW clients for a while... If you would like to get on a waiting list for a tattoo, please call 718-916-9365, and I will call you as soon as something becomes available. Clients with tattoos in progress will be scheduled as normal.*

My Interests

Tattoos. Art. Teratology. Carnies. Forbidden Girls. Serial Killers. Torture... Is there really anything else?

I'd like to meet:

Dead Girls, Tattooed Carnie Freaks, and Scumbags. Future Victims. Someone I Can Keep In A Little Box.

Tim Kern's Tour Dates:

Ink-N-Iron Tattoo & Kustom Culture Festival
June 6-8, 2008
Long Beach, CA

Atlanta Tattoo Convention
June 13-15, 2008
Atlanta, Georgia

Paris Tattoo Art Fest
July 4-6, 2008
Paris, France

London Tattoo Convention
Sept 26-28, 2008
London, England

Old School St. Louis Tattoo Convention
November 14-16, 2008
St. Louis, MO

King Of Tattoo Convention
November 22-24, 2008
Tokyo, Japan

Music:

Firewater, Mike Doughty, Nick Cave, Satanicide, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Superjoint Ritual, Cop Shoot Cop, Lovage, Mr. Bungle, White Stripes, Johnny Fucking Cash, Burzum, old Metallica, Marilyn Manson, No Means No, The Cows, CopShootCop, Heroine Sheiks, Tool, Lamb of God, Arch Enemy, Chimaira, Drive By Truckers, The Coup, Ween, Tom Waits, Misfits, Social Distortion, Soul Coughing, Slunt, Lollipop Lust Kill....

Movies:

Pan's Labyrinth, Battle Royale, Long Jeane Silver, Donnie Darko, Ichi The Killer, Blade Runner, Versus, Ringu, Snatch, Frailty, Hellraiser, Amelie, Fudoh: The Next Generation, Big Trouble In Little China, Crash, Versus, Coen Bros movies, David Fincher movies...

Television:

I wish I was some snobby artist type that was too good for television. But I'm not. I watch it all the time.... CSI, MXC, surgery shows, forensic shows... I'm all over that shit like blowflys on a decomposing body. Plastic Surgery Gone Wrong is a guilty pleasure too....

Books:

Battle Royale, Geek Love, The Contortionist's Handbook, A Hand in the Bush, City of Broken Dolls, Bad Boys And Tough Tattoos, Circus Of The Scars, Sell Yourself To Science, Fight Club, Books of Blood, My Alphabet, Johnny Got His Gun, Diary, The Encyclopedia Of Unusual Sex Practices, Ring, Illuminatus! Trilogy, Cows, High Life, Survivor, True Crime books...

Heroes:

Most people are self-centered bastards and wouldn't help another human being if it meant getting their nails dirty... My heroes are the ones who would show up with a shovel and garbage bags if you called them....

My Blog

Synecdoche, New York!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Hs7SZAhYGY The movie I worked on last summer, "Synecdoche, New York," premiered at the Cannes Film Festival this weekend... You can see some of the tattoo desi...
Posted by Tim Kern on Sun, 25 May 2008 01:55:00 PST

Big changes.

May 22nd was exactly one year since Dan Marshall, Liorcifer and I parted ways with Last Rites. Now we are proud to announce that Tribulation Tattoo has found a home. Next month, we will be returning t...
Posted by Tim Kern on Fri, 23 May 2008 11:52:00 PST

Premiere.com interview!

Last summer, I did tattoo design work for the new Charlie Kaufman film, "Synecdoche, New York." To read more details about what was involved, and the kind of work I did, check out my interview at Prem...
Posted by Tim Kern on Fri, 18 Apr 2008 08:49:00 PST

Moving on.

I am no longer working at Last Rites Tattoo Theatre in NYC. I am grateful to Paul Booth for the opportunity to be a part of such a great crew at such a unique shop, but it is time for me to move on. ...
Posted by Tim Kern on Wed, 30 May 2007 11:28:00 PST

How well do you know me?

Body: This IS A SURVEY WITH A TWIST - YOU fill in the blanks about ME an send it back to ONLY ME. But FIRST, send a BLANK one to all your friends, including ME, so they can return the favor to YOU. BE...
Posted by Tim Kern on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

This one's about YOU...

1. Who are you? 2. Are we friends? 3. When and how did we meet? 4. Do you have a crush on me? 5. Would you kiss me? 6. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it. 7. Describe me in o...
Posted by Tim Kern on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

This is ridiculous...

LOOK OUT!ïòðYmonster is a radioactive squirrel!!Username: From Go-Quiz.com Tim Kern may explode without warningMEXPLOSIVEUsername: From Go-Quiz.com Funny...but apparently true.......
Posted by Tim Kern on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

I knew I had it in me!

I AM 84% EVIL GENIUS!I am pure evil. I lie awake at night devising schemes of world domination, and I will not rest until all living souls bend to my will.Take the EVIL GENIUS test at Fuali.com .....
Posted by Tim Kern on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST