Papa Jail Bait profile picture

Papa Jail Bait

I defy you to define me.

About Me

I am incredibly cynical.
I swear every other word.
I loathe ignorance and stupidity.
I'd rather die on my feet.
I laugh at my own jokes.
I'd gladly throw down on someone for antagonizing any of my friends and family.
I'm really much nicer than I'll admit.
I am also one of the biggest nerds you'll ever meet.

My Interests

I am interested in nothing. Nothing interests me.

I'd like to meet:

Someone who I can talk to.
More than that, someone I can listen to.
I need somebody who can look at my eccentricities and respond to them with their own.
As far as specific people I want to meet? The members of GWAR (in character) and Iron Maiden would be amazing to meet. Jason Statham, Bruce Willis, Clive Owen, Jon Stewart, Stephen Colbert, and Louis C.K. would be pretty cool to meet as well. I want to meet Starscream, too.
Also: I'd like to fight J.K. Rowling.

Music:

I am what I'd like to call musicall obese. It's a disease. I just gobble up whatever I hear and I generally love it. NOISE? AWM NAWM NAWM NAWM
More specifically though, I really enjoy metal and alt rock.

Movies:

It's hard to find a movie I don't like. I love Star Wars, Back to the Future, Indiana Jones, Lord of the Rings, Superhero movies, Kung-fu movies, Crank, Kung-fu Hustle, Knocked Up, Dodgeball, Zoolander, Elf. You get the idea.

Television:

Don't watch a lot of television.

Books:

I like anything Fantasy or Sci-fi. I think that the only kind of books I don't enjoy are romance novels and ones written by that british motherfucker Charles Dickens.
Also: Fuck Shakespeare.

Heroes:

I am the motherfucking hero.
I love you mommy.Also: Maddie. I love my Maddie, even if she has zero willpower and feet that could peel the paint off walls.

My Blog

A Letter with No Address.

I wrote this an interminably long while ago, and I found it a few hours ago.  I'm not sure why I'm posting it.  I suppose I just couldn't think of a good enough reason not to. _____I hate yo...
Posted by Papa Jail Bait on Thu, 19 Jun 2008 05:39:00 PST

Being Hookie

While I was in public school, I always had trouble skipping.  I mean some days I honestly did not want to go to school, but staying home was so much more awful.  I didn't find it awful to be...
Posted by Papa Jail Bait on Fri, 13 Jun 2008 09:37:00 PST

Color Me Inspired

So I am beginning to find some drive from somewhere deep down.  I've decided that even if it might not be worth it to continue to struggle with life's hurdles, it is most certainly not going to b...
Posted by Papa Jail Bait on Thu, 12 Jun 2008 12:25:00 PST

Id Like to Cancel My Subscription

"Am I happy?"  That's a question I really don't ask myself all that much.  The reasoning isn't because the answer's usually yes, but quite to the contrary.  The answer is almost constan...
Posted by Papa Jail Bait on Sun, 08 Jun 2008 10:53:00 PST

Gettin’ the Juices Flowin’

I have been reading quite a bit lately and today on my day off I had nothing to read.  Naturally, I began to write.    It was strange.  I haven't written in so long, yet it's stil...
Posted by Papa Jail Bait on Tue, 11 Mar 2008 07:46:00 PST

Musings

Don't think of things in terms of what they should be.  Think of them in terms of what they are.  The world isn't cold or cruel, it simply is.  If you were to look upon everything you s...
Posted by Papa Jail Bait on Thu, 26 Jul 2007 10:00:00 PST

How 'bout this stormy weather?

As of this summer, I am going to find myself without a home again.  Steven's dad is retiring this summer and this house is in for "uncertain times" so apparently it's time I "made arrangements." ...
Posted by Papa Jail Bait on Wed, 04 Apr 2007 08:33:00 PST

When Did Life Get So Serious?

At what point did we stop laughing at our problems and start crying about them?
Posted by Papa Jail Bait on Sat, 09 Dec 2006 06:24:00 PST

Welcome to your teenage years, Eternity!

Since I am a bad big brother and didn't call her today, I'd like to make sure to point out that I did not forget my sister's birthday.  Eternity (the sister who most of you haven't met) turned 13...
Posted by Papa Jail Bait on Wed, 22 Nov 2006 07:27:00 PST

David Blaine, Street Magic

...
Posted by Papa Jail Bait on Sun, 29 Oct 2006 02:53:00 PST