John - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Finding new sources of amusement to replace self destructive ones is not an easy thing to do.

My Interests

Pretending to be smarter than I really am, winning arguments through the use of parlor tricks, semantics, and technicalities.

I'd like to meet:

Statistically speaking, probably not you.

Music:

I like a particular brand of rock music that's dead today, or at best on life support with tubes up it's nose. I don't think Johnny Be Good by Chuck Berry has been topped, to this day, in terms of structure and energy. I'll take Jailhouse Rock or Jumpin Jack Flash over U2 or Green Day any day of the week.

Movies:

I watch too many damned movies. I should stop it.

Television:

I like to tell people they shouldn't watch too much television, and I belive it, but I secretly watch quite a bit of it myself.

Books:

Far too many books and authors to list. In no particular order, those that have affected my life the most are the King James Bible, The Grapes of Wrath, Tortilla Flat, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, You Got Nothin Comin, Old Man and the Sea, To Have and Have Not, The Communist Manifesto, and The Stand.

Heroes:

Any organized rebel, so long as we're talking about someone whose ideology displays a fundamental humanism and disregard for convention. John Shaft, Hunter Thompson, Gandhi, and Yoda are all good examples.

My Blog

Random Musings

What the hell is everyone complaining about Britney Spears' performance for? Personally, I thought she looked hot. Of course the song was shit and she didn't dance well, but who cares? Was there ev...
Posted by John on Wed, 19 Sep 2007 02:51:00 PST

Slut Payday

Paris Hilton is going to be paid a million dollars for her first interview after jail.In other words, Paris Hilton is going to be paid more money than most human beings will earn in their lifetimes, a...
Posted by John on Thu, 21 Jun 2007 12:05:00 PST

Whore of Babylon

When I was 18, a friend of mine was stopped at a red light, with his girlfriend riding shotgun in his Hyundai. It was around midnight on a Saturday night. The light was about to turn green...
Posted by John on Fri, 08 Jun 2007 10:16:00 PST

The Tao of Scooby

When Scooby Doo comes throughwhich he always doeshe gets a Scooby Snack. The mechanics of it are so simple, so consistent, that it takes on the quality of poetry. Scooby does not fail; failure is ...
Posted by John on Wed, 11 Apr 2007 01:41:00 PST

Everything I Know about Las Vegas (well, not everything, but a lot)

Because I have been asked for about it so many times over the years, and because it is hard-won, expensive information, I have decided to exhaustively and with finality impart my Las Vegas knowledge f...
Posted by John on Tue, 20 Mar 2007 05:31:00 PST

Robbed

For months I've been struggling with the idea of putting these thoughts to words, nor for lack of words but for lack of will, because I understand that no one cares.To see the apathy with which Americ...
Posted by John on Sat, 17 Mar 2007 05:10:00 PST

Abducted

The Rio Grande is the name of a river that separates Mexico from Texas, and it's also the name of a building that was once an auditorium where the best musicians in Mexico played, but now is ...
Posted by John on Wed, 28 Feb 2007 01:40:00 PST

R.I.P. Anna Nicole Smith

It's all too easy for us to sit back and judge, without ever having known or met her.She lived a hard life, and looking from the outside it seemed like she was really suffering.She's gone now, and I f...
Posted by John on Thu, 08 Feb 2007 01:53:00 PST

Black

: A sliding plastic clip with a razor blade affixed to the bottom which slices and dices as it slides back and forth along an oblong plastic rail which is blacker than night and stretches further than...
Posted by John on Thu, 08 Feb 2007 09:58:00 PST

I Was on T.V.

In the summer of 1993, I was sixteen years old.I'd been a big fan of Glen Danzig since his days in the Misfits, and Danzig's then current album, Danzig II: Lucifuge, was played almost constantly on ca...
Posted by John on Thu, 25 Jan 2007 04:53:00 PST