Fiend profile picture

Fiend

And When you feel the back of my eyes I feel the pain & I feel Alive

About Me

I can’t fully explain what I can say who I am. The reason Is because of how complex of a person I am. Sometimes I'm far too complex for ordinary people, such as you. I'm unlike anything or anyone you will ever meet, To understand me you must know my Life and what it’s about. I was never the person I am now. I was known by another name that is still being used by people. Some of you reading this might know my name. I'm not the person I used to be. That person is dead. By finding me here, you've already stumbled upon your journey into learning who I really am, and what I really am is nothing you probably couldn’t have imagined .
I AM :
• Quiet/Shy Until I get to know you
• Kind And Friendly
• Honest[I sometimes tell little white lies though]
• Talkative [Once I start to know you]
• Thrill-Seeking
• FAT [But Not For Long!]"it's easy to put on weight instead of losing it!"
• Girl~ish Sometimes [Not Gay}
• Happy
• Playful
• weird/unusual/odd/Freakish [to all those "Normal" People]
• Experimental
• Depressed/Suicidal{Mentally}-[Sometimes]
• Frustrated
• Confused
• Old-School [Basically Fashion and Music-wise ]
• Disturbed/Haunted
• Romantic
• Lyrical
• Intelligent [on what I know & like to know]
• Funny
• Needy
• Creative
• NOT! going to Date Anyone UNDER MY AGE!!!
If you want to know more! Just talk to me!
I WANT TO:
• Fit in with "Mature" & understanding People {It's happening already!}
• Be Loved, So I can Love Back!
• Maintain my Innocence & pride
• Have More Knowledge
• Look "MORE" Attractive
• Have MONEY $ $ $/A Part-time job
• Be in the Music Business
• Have Something to Live For
• Live in Chicago's downtown or North-Side: Lake view or Wicker Park
• Go to Europe!
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Layout by CoolChaser

My Interests


• Smoking Weed, Doing Drugs & Other Types of Ill Shit!
• Listening to Music a Lot
• Concerts (The Best stuff happens to me when I go- Except the family values tour 2007-I had a hard time Getting home-Son of a bitch!)
• Incense
• Vampires, They really are interesting creatures
• Sensing vitality when drinking blood
• Walking in downtown at night, Its really calm and nice and I like the way the lights go when it’s dark, it’s fun to be a creature of the night.
• Writing Songs
• Getting Inspired
• Exploring more music
• Gothic Architecture (Elegant castles, Arches and churches)
• Romanticism
• Nocturnal Beauty
• Italian Food (I can make a good batch of spaghetti)
• HALLOWEEN
• Sunglasses, Especially at night
• Lace
• Velvet
• Chains, that’s right!!
• Stripes with different colors
• Gardens
• Europe
• Shopping [For music, clothes, movies, gifts for friends etc.]
• Anything Retro 80s Underground (That right I’m old school I don’t like too much of my generation today!)
• People who express themselves And BODY ART
• People who intrigue me or have similar interests as me, or make Me happy (This means I HATE WANNABES and SUCK-UP’s).
• Trying Different Things/Experimenting
• Futuristic Aspects
• The Rain (Sometimes)
• Betty Paige Hairstyle/Bangs (That Haircut will make me do just about anything.) {I love those kind of girls}
• Learning [Biology, Italian, French, some Spanish just to learn Italian More about music, the possibilities are endless.]
• Hanging out with friends (Not all of them)
• Hanging out in a metropolitan area (Downtown or the north-side) Not my Neighborhood and Not the south because it’s boring, Ugly and straight up shitty!!!
• Scaring People (If You Scare me I’ll Scare you back BIG TIME)
• Comedy, Not Black Comedy because it’s not funny. “Friday” “Don’t be a Menace” and something with Dave Chapelle are The Only of Black Comedy I’ll Like.
• Taking Fun Dangerous Stupid risks (Sorry Ladies this one is Me and my brothers only! Unless you’re a girl who is like That, then join the party. Sorry it sounds stupid but a lot of Girls don’t like Risks like that, I mean aren’t we created equal -C’mon girl you can take a hit, don’t be scared!
• Drawing, I’m very good at it but I won’t take it as a career So stop persuading me into it!
• Hurting/Inflicting pain on wrongdoers (I don’t care if your A guy or a girl, Weak or strong your gonna get what you Deserve!)
• Animals (Stop the cruelty you sick fucks)
• The supernatural and oddities of life
• Neon Colors
• Working out (Exercising)
• Hugging People (only certain people)
• Messing around with some of my friends
• Giving/Offering
• Receiving
• Playing with clay
• Babies, They’re so cute, Especially when they’re Chunky
• Make-up Effects
• Playing with friends
• Making People Laugh
• People Who tell the truth And Tell it like it is.

• The Neighborhood I am currently living in
• My Hometown in South Texas
• My Family (Mainly My Dad’s Side)
• My Culture-Because stupid People will think that That I easily speak and know the Language and Assume I like my Culture, Well I don’t! Why Can’t I be me for who I am instead of something My ancestors were! It’s stupid and Ridiculous.
• Propaganda
• Animal Testing/Torture and Cruelty
• Environmental Waste/Pollution
• A lot of Elements of Communism
• Elements of Fascism
• Homophobia
• Racism (yeah!)
• Stereotypical People
• People that act like they know me
• Unnecessary constant changes
• Being late for events and requirements
• Beer (Do you know what they put in that stuff?)
• People who try to be like others instead of themselves
• When things come out the wrong way
• Depression/Sadness
• People who aren’t able to admit anything true
• People Who Lie TOO MUCH, or Tell the Biggest Bullshit
• People who play with my feelings and my Heart-BITCH! I’ll Fucking Strangle you with them!!!
• Doing Things I hate to do (Unless I get something out of it.)
• Not Having Any Money (But at least I have a job)
• People who want to annoy me or hurt me (in the end they Get hurt, mainly because they realize how pathetic they Are by just wasting their time. Now how sad is that?
• Conformity
• People who don’t want to make a difference and then They complain about the situation (Mainly a lot of commies do that)
• Wannabes/Posers/Pretenders
• Hypocrites
• Women who degrade themselves Constantly
• People who want attention for the stupidest stuff
• A Big Part of school
• Sassy and Tough wannabe people
• Pedophiles (And That’s so horrible because I like children)
• Abusers/Wrongdoers
• People who label themselves
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I'd like to meet:

WHOEVER I WANT TO MEET!!!

Music:

•SKINNY PUPPY(met them),
AND SKINNY PUPPY RELATED(R.I.P.Dwayne R.Goettel)
They will always be My Favorite Band! If you LOVE SKINNY PUPPY I Just HAVE TO BE YOUR FRIEND!!!!!(That's all I can say)
• MINISTRY (met them)+(R.I.P Paul Raven)
• BAUHAUS
• THE CURE
• CLAN OF XYMOX
• THE REVOLTING COCKS (met Ministry but...)
• THE JOY DIVISION (R.I.P.Ian Curtis)
• THE JESUS AND MARY CHAIN
• VELVET ACID CHRIST
• PETER MURPHY
• DAVID BOWIE
• DEPECHE MODE
• JEFFREE STAR*
• DANIEL ASH
• PAILHEAD
• PTP
• PRONG (met tommy victor)
• 1000 HOMO DJs
• THE MISSION [U.K.]
• KILLING JOKE
• THE SISTERS OF MERCY
• ALICE COOPER
• ALIEN SEX FIEND
• GOBLIN
• THE DANSE SOCIETY
• THE BIRTHDAY MASSACRE
• JUDAS PRIEST
• OBSZON GESCHOPF
• SNOW BLACK
• THE WAKE
• ZIM ZUM-MUSIC
• CULTURE CLUB
• UK DECAY
• ADAM & THE ANTS
• THE GERMS
• UK SUBS
• THE MARIONETTES
• PRETENTIOUS, MOI?
• VIRGIN PRUNES
• COAL CHAMBER & DEVILDRIVER (Met Dez)
• BLACK TAPE FOR A BLUE GIRL
• SIOXSIEE AND THE BANSHEES
• NEW ORDER
• TONES ON TAIL
• PUBLIC IMAGE LTD.
• LOVE AND ROCKETS
• CABARET VOLTAIRE
• MATTHEW SWEET
• THE GLOVE
• PSYCHEDELIC FURS
• THE MISFITS
• THE VELVET UNDERGROUND
• LOU REED
• LARD
• BUCK SATAN
• STELLASTAR*
• INTERPOL
• THE CULT/DEATH CULT/SOUTHERN DEATH CULT
• THE MARCH VIOLETS
• ORGY
• CRADLE OF FILTH
• SHE WANT'S REVENGE
• THE DOORS
• T.A.T.U.
• GUSTER
• CAIFANES
• BILLY IDOL
• PIG
• SPECIMEN
• PIGFACE
• COCTEAU TWINS
• CHRISTIAN DEATH
• A SPLIT SECOND
• KMFDM
• BILE
• BIG BLACK
• GODFLESH
• LONDON AFTER MIDNIGHT
• ZEROMANCER
• THE BIRTHDAY PARTY
• SOFT CELL
• THROBBING GRISTLE
• PINK FLOYD
• NOTHINGFACE
• TKK(?if you know what that means)
• DEAD OR ALIVE
• FIELDS OF THE NEPHILIM
• ALICE IN CHAINS
• KLUTE
• KRAFTWERK
• LEAETHER STRIP
• POP WILL EAT ITSELF
• DIE KRUPPS
• TWISTED SISTER
• OZZY OSBOURNE
• KISS
• AC/DC
• DANZIG
• L'AME IMMORTELLE
• DOG FASHION DISCO
• HOCICO
• PET SHOP BOYS
• CRUXSHADOWS
• SEX GANG CHILDREN
• THE SEX PISTOLS
• A PERFECT CIRCLE
• THE DAMNED
• BUCKETHEAD
• GODHEAD
• THE SMITH'S
• ALPHAVILLE
• NITZER EBB
• SEPULTURA (MAX CAVALERA ONLY!)
• SKATENIGS
• SOULFLY
• TOOL
• TYPE O NEGATIVE
• PSYCLON NINE
• DAWN OF ASHES
• BLACK SABBATH
• FRONT 242
• WILL SMITH
• JUST ABOUT ALL "WAX TRAX" ARTISTS (This is Chicago!)
• SUICIDE COMMANDO
• EIFFEL 65
• EDRIA

Basically I Listen to:
• OLD SCHOOL INDUSTRIAL & EBM Genres
• GOTH R0CK/DEATHROCK
• COLD WAVE
• DARK WAVE
• POST PUNK
• Some DARK INDIE
• ALTERNATIVE (NOT REALLY THE BASIC KIND)
• Some SHOEGAZE
• [Old School] NEW WAVE
• PSYCHEDELIC
• [Several Kinds of] ELECTRONICA & DANCE
• 80s RAP & HIP-HOP [POSITIVE]
• NEW ROMANTIC
• [A Little] AGGROTECH/HELLEKTRO
• [Some] OLD SCHOOL METAL
•EXPERIMENTAL
• 80s SYNTH POP.
• ALTERNATIVE DANCE
•FUCK MTV! FUCK MAINSTREAM! AND FUCK MUSIC THATS JUST FOR FAME AND MONEY!
Down ere' is what I listen to, If you don't like what I listen to well...FUCK YOU!

Movies:

I LIKE ALL KINDS OF MOVIES TO BE HONEST HOWEVER I DON'T
WATCH TOO MUCH, BUT MY FAVORITE's WOULD HAVE TO BE:
•GYPSY 83
• DRACULA (old+new)
• INTERVIEW WITH A VAMPIRE
• THE LOST BOYS
• THE CENTRAL PARK DRIFTER
• THE HUNGER
• SUBSPECIES {Anthology}
• THE VAMPIRE JOURNALS
• NOSFERATU
• FRIGHT NIGHT
• FRIGHT NIGHT 2
• VAMPIRE HUNTER D
• NEAR DARK
(I Mainly consider vampire films my favorites)
• DON JUAN DeMARCO
• NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD
• GHOST IN THE SHELL
• ALICE IN WONDERLAND
• NEKROMANTIK
• EVIL DEAD [trilogy]
• A CLOCKWORK ORANGE
• HELLRAISER [franchise]
• DEMONS
• DEMONS 2
• THE CROW (No I'm not like those stupid kids! I really love that movie!!)
• BEETLEJUICE
• EDWARD SCCISORHANDS
• THE GATE
• THE GATE 2
• ROBOCOP [Trilogy]
• DEADLY FRIEND
• HALF BAKED
• STRANGELAND
• PET CEMETERY
• PET CEMETERY II
• THE PUNISHER [Dolph Lundgren]
• DARIO ARGENTO FILMS (my favorites too!)
• LUCIO FULCI FILMS
• Horror
• Cult
• Underground
• Independent
• Drama
• Comedy
• ACTION
• INDEPENDENT ANIME [The Weirder the Better,NOT PORN!]
• 80s trash/Exploitation (you know! cool homemade movies from the 80's)

Television:

I don’t watch that much TV as I used to but
• ED,EDD n EDDY
• TWO and a Half MEN(One of the last good TV shows around)
• TALES FROM THE CRYPT &
TALES FROM THE CRYPTKEEPER
• BEETLEJUICE
• BONE CHILLERS
• NED'S NIGHTMARES
• L00NEY TUNES
• FAMILY GUY
• MALCOM IN THE MIDDLE
• RANMA 1/2
• SOUTH PARK
• MARRIED WITH CHILDREN
• BATMAN(90s)& BATMAN BEYOND
• THAT 70s SHOW
• DRAGONBALL & DRAGONBALL Z
• YU YU HAKASHO
• TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES (80s)
• MIGHTY MAX
• BIKER MICE FROM MARS
• SAILOR MOON [I fell in Love with those girls]
• BUMP IN THE NIGHT
• SESAME STREET [Growing Up]

Books:

I DON'T READ THAT MANY BOOKS! BUT THOSE FROM POPPY Z.BRITE AND RANDOM NOVELS,AND ONES THAT CAN SCARE ME. •Lord of the Flies
•Black Boy
•Brave New World

Heroes:

My Heroes aren't on postage stamps!

My Blog

Something I can Never have

I am sick of having my heart almost going to explode for obsessing over a Stupid girl one year after the Next! I just cant take it anymore! why does this only have to happen to me? you know what! I'm ...
Posted by Fiend on Sat, 18 Oct 2008 04:04:00 PST

a Retrospective of MINISTRY pt.1/My 1st Blog

Early years and With Sympathy (19811984) Al Jourgensen began Ministry in Chicago, Illinois in 1981. His first band prior to Ministry was Special Affect with Groovie Mann (of My Life With the Thrill K...
Posted by Fiend on Tue, 06 May 2008 05:10:00 PST