Damn It, Paula! [friends only]

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http://damnitpaula.blogspot.com/
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HONESTLY...

I'm pretty content with who I am and what I've become, even though I know there's more things I need to learn.
I consider myself a very nice person, sometimes too nice.
Don't assume "nice=naive", people in my life usually make that mistake and treat me like a kid.
Contrary to what u think/believe, It takes a lot for me to trust people. I know a lot of people claim they have trust issues, but I'm really not proud of it, and I wish I didn't have them, I consider them a curse.
I'm definitely a lover not a fighter. I'm a giver not a taker. I love making people happy, and making a difference in someone's life.
I will respect you, but I expect respect back. I've learn to give as much as I get. So, expect to be treated the way you treat me.
I tend to remember the negative words/expressions more that the positive ones, so be careful with how you say things.
I have thousands of theories about life, people, and the world. Some of them silly, some of them serious. There's always more than one thought in my head. I over-think everything until it gets boring.
“I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness because it shows me the stars.”
I'm a sucker for learning, and knowing random facts. This has saved me from boring conversations and akward silences.
I believe in karma, and that everything happens for a reason. Although sometimes I've found it hard to find a reason for the things i go through.
I'm a hopeless romantic, and I have a heart of glass. I take things too personal sometimes, and let them affect me too much. I believe there's good in everyone, and that gets me in trouble. I don't understand war, the need of hurting, the need of being offensive, or the need of breaking hearts.
I believe there's a God out there. I find comfort in this. I respect if you feel different, but having faith has helped me a lot during the hard times. so, don't try to change my mind about it. I believe in whatever I want to believe in, I like to see this as my own religion. I like reading about this subject a lot, so what I believe in is a mix of many different religions.

I take friendship very personal. I love my friends more than anything in this world, even though most of them don't realize it. I don't really like "hang out friends". I would much rather have one very good friend than ten "hang out friends". I was blessed with friends that are completely the opposite to me, which is good and bad, we balanced each other. They all have the worst memory ever. still, they are the best and I wouldn't trade them for anything in this world.
Yes, I'm a hopeless romantic but i'm not stupid. I don't waste my time on guys that don't know what they want. Which is why I've been single most of my life. I 'm picky when it comes to guys. I'm too sensitive to deal with bullshit or guys that just want a "fun time". I'm not that kind of girl, and I'll never be, regardless of what you may think. I much rather date my close friends than a stranger. This is because I know they know the real me, and I know they have no intention of hurting me.
I'm a family person. I have the best mother and 3 sisters someone could ask for. I'm trying to learn how to forgive my father, I still care about him, though.
I'm an art lover. I could spend hours at a museum just trying to figure out the artist's feelings. But I also do that with everybody, I love "people watching"
I'm a sucker for affection, and it's only fair for you to know this. The little things mean more to me than the big ones. A hug means more than a thousand words. I don't need fancy things, or you to spend money on me, just hold my hand, take a walk, and kiss me on the forehead when the world has turned it's back on me. People think this makes me a very complicated gal in a very simple world, I see it as a very simple girl in a very complicated world.
As bad as it sounds, I try very hard not to think about the future. I'm not even sure if i'm going to be alive next week, so I try to live day-by-day.