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Matt

I am here for Friends

About Me


You may have to rescue me from limestone quarries frequently Those corporate stunt shows you attend you’ll never get us back again Say!Hello spinal curvature Get used to the mirthless furniture Now we’ve kissed I’ve written this list I thought you ought to knowThem’s the vagariesWell I’ll not sit backwards on the train I can’t say I’ll always flush the chain And what I call pleasure you may call pain I’m talking five day testsPrepare to lose you dignity As I ride to victory Down the aisles at Tesco Wearing nothing much at allAncient pack-horse bridges we’ll avoid Marijuana bores must be destroyedBin men thin men lexicographers Squid yes not so octopus Egg sandwiches on coach trips in June I simply won’t be thereNo way joke shop excrement Don’t say the light show’s excellent It makes you smell like a laboratory instead of a Fan of the bandThem’s the vagariesOh Brit Pop turquoise chips with apricot Sheepskin nose-bands kids in Aldershot You point to cages in my yard and you ask: What are them things there?Them’s the aviaries [x several]And I’ve been saving these Things just for you

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

I shout all my obscenities from steeples, but please dont label me a madman, I'm off to see the Bootleg Beatles, as the bootleg Mark Chapman, Cafe bars, idiots and pidgeons, theres far too many in this town, so me and the ombudsman, are gonna do what we can, when the evening sun goes down.Yes, some of my pull-overs are roll-necked, It kind of breaks up the ennui, But your experimental side project, Must have put 10 years on me, Opposite the Bannister and Shamrock, Which used to be the Rose and Crown, I like to play Pat Boone, On the county bassone, When the evening sun goes down, When the evening sun goes down,When the evening sun, When the evening sun, When the evening sun goes down,When the evening sun, When the evening sun, When the evening sun goes down,There are questions in corners of my mind that lurk, (When the evening sun goes down) Like How do the road gritters get to work? (When the evening sun goes down) Answer me that, and you could win a cruise, (When the evening sun goes down) And heres Judy Tsuke to take us up to the news, (When the evening sun goes down)Are these my ultimate Pajamas, Is this my final dressing gown, I'm sending on this rhyme, deep in injury time, When the evening sun goes down, When the evening sun goes down, When the evening sun goes down, When the evening sun goes....

Music:

I’m gonna grab myself an industry insider mask and blag myself in to the after show I wanna get in amongst the baying hordes of resting actors Who’ve just got back from visiting Nairobi slums for Comic Relief And now they’re going to spend the next six weeks sitting in the vestibule Waiting for the Farm Foods phone call The farm foods phone callI’m going to be apprehended by some mandatory galoot with a hand held camera Who will point it in my face and say, “what are you and what do you do” And I’ll say I’m a counterblast to Agnosticism how do you do And he’ll go away immediatelyI wanna meet Howard Marks but they say that I can’t I need four different wrist bandsOh me oh follow down to the hollow and there we will wallowThere a Brit Pop refuge walking up to me And his face is hollow from seasons of disappointment And he starts blathering on about his latest project Already being dismissed by the most unlikeliest of cable stations It’s a dot com sitcom about a hip hop chip shopChatto and Windus sitting in a tree “D” “I” “S” “S” “I” “N” “G” Keith Allen’s autobiographyI’m just trying to break the drudgery of the downstairs maid I’m just trying to write the sort of tune you can maybe hum while waiting for Your lover on a railway platformI wanna meet Howard Marks but they say that I can’tOh me oh follow down to the hollow and there we will wallowI want to perch myself halfway up a metal staircase with the Polydor girls And talk about meerkats and come out with statements like Well of course music these days is the slave of mammon and as a result It has become corrupt and shallow Its real essence is industry Its moral purpose is the acquisition of money Its aesthetic pretext is the entertainment of those who are bored And yes we’re really excited about going back in to the studio Hotly tipped highly anticipated and slated for releaseI wanna meet Howard Marks but they say that I can’t He’s talking to Ian BroudieAnd come four o’clock if I’m still on my feet there’s a bloke over there Who said I could meet……Ken Livingstone Well I’m just a primitive creature of the heath so excuse my savage ignorance But if I’m still on my feet at four o’clock I’ll be stealing the lead of the roofOh me oh follow down to the hollow and there we will wallowStealing the lead of the roof [x4]Come saddle my milk white steed I’ve seen much more than I need And I know that you won’t heed the call So straight in on in to the wallThy damnation, slumbereth not