Prolific Memorie

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First of all my name is Memorie, I mean think about it, try growing up as a tall skinny freckle face redhaed with a high IQ, and serious emotional damage.I'm rediculously rediculous.As complicated as i may seem, If you want to categorize me in a more simple fashion,have at it, cuz you'll just be chasing your tail in circles for the rest of eternity. I'm also a bit one of the more complicated personalities that you would ever encounter.I have always been on the same perilous journey, to find another poet's heart with an artist'S soul.For the most part I'm a sad person, and it seems like just when I think Iv'e stumbled upon a reason to smile, it usually becomes a new reason for me crawl back into my little dark room and cry with even more loss of hope than before.I feel as if i will always fall for the men that I could never realistically keep in my life, its always the ones that hate me for who I am and spend more time trying to change me then just excepting our differences . So challenge me on that one. Prove your smile is real,and you really love me, don't just spit out some romantic sounding BS, becuase I'm a hopeless romantic that wears her heart onher sleeve.Do us all a favor and shutup and kiss me. I am trying still for this journey and I feel as if thats the only thing i'm here for sometimes, just to be broken down.And if there were a God, he either would get a huge kick out my life, or just shake his head at me.i'm actually crying as I am writing this, I don't even know why to be honest. Bittersweet Symphony So there she sat once again listening to the saddest yet most beautiful song to ever exist.Thinking of what had become of her.Had she totally lost her mind this time?Was her heart for sure unrepairable? Was her time on this godforsaken planet up? Well since were joining her in her rediculously depressing adventure I quess we'll know soon enough. You see, tomorrow May ,18, 2007 represents the the day that she was let out into this realm of the world.Now with that in mind, her temptation to take herself out of it, on the same calander marked day was peeking. The only hurdle there was to jump was the fact that throughout her life she has developed sincere morals involving others feelings; according to her actions. Was it acceptable to put the tears and the heartbreak upon her father,which she was possitve was the only person on this planet that she had yet encountered, that ,"Gave a flying fuck", of her presense.Well' of course not she thought. Although her moral thoughts were still in tact,it was a shame her sanity had long deserted her. With that said, you may assume what was indefinately going to occur on May,18,2007.But how, being a insanely creative woman? With her muse being locked up in his room 5 miles away(the love of her life) a few years ago that still torments her in her everyday existance.He would probably be able to give her a better understanding of how bittersweet her death could be. So, she called him. No answer once again.Excactly why he refuses her calls, but answers the door when she comes by still bewilders her. Now back to the topic at hand. Loving the ocean so much she thought perhaps drowning would be a nice way to go.It would allow her to contribute to the circle of life by,becoming fish food, and also would be ironically lovely. Just so happens one of her accuantances from the island just asked her to come out there. The problem with this idea was infact she was an excellent swimmer.And the human body reacts to such situations by coughing water back up out of it's lungs. Even with that knoweldge, she thought for sure it was the answer to her query.With that settled,now came the artistic details.When ,where,and what would she be found clothed in? Would there be any significant trinkets to carry with her? All white most definely is what she would be dressed in.To her that only made sense.A walk down the beach would guide her to her destination.And as for those trinkets, all the letters that her past love had written her, she would carry with her to the bottom of the sea.Was it so whom ever found her would know why she drowned?Possibly, it was also possible that she would carry them with her through the eternity of loneliness she awaited, just to know she had received love at one time in her Bittersweet Symphony of a life. Just as she thought she was done predicting what were occur the following day. She decides to make one more phone call.The information she gets is enough to make her broken heart shatter. Her past love is held up in a run down,powerless,waterless and rat infested trailor.Preparing himself for an entry to jail the following day May18,2007.Giving her even more reason to follow through with her story ending.The tears are even more productive upon her face and the emptyness has fully taken over. It is at this time when all the planning and preparation for tomorrow mean absolutely nothing. There is no commonsense for miles from her over analitical cranium.Just as she may she has nothing left to weil from the depths of her soul,she finds herself wondering if her attacker of the heart is going to be cold or hungry.Suddenly becoming overwhelming angry with herself ,for caring about someone who obviously didn't feel so much for her.She once again sends herself into a silent rant.Asking herself,"why?".That fucker threw you out of a moving car and then left you there.Then proceded to lie and make you look like blooming idiot.Beat you up and throw you into a burning fire and left you out in the woods in the middle of nowhere." The only way she made it out of there was because of her excellent social skills. Still rambling, she adds,"Then on your anniversary,after you wrote him a poem,painted him a painting and bought him flowers,...he had the audasity to refuse you in the bed that night. Oh, and that's not all,beats you up again,this time in the backyard of his parents house, rubs dirt in your eyes,repeatedly knocks you in the face and side of the head with the telephone,and procedes to threaten you and your fathers lives!" She now realizes why she's given up. No matter how much love and devotion she gives the world, she will always receive the worlds cruelest people to bury her. This is why it has all come to this .This story.The End.C:....s and Settings.. ALL COMES EASIER THAN EXPECTED IF YOU DON'T EXPECT IT.SO NEXT TIME YOU TRY, DONT' TRY TO HARD. ..