Max - ProfilesArchive

About Me

MILF hunter

My Interests

Movies

I'd like to meet:

This guy. He hates those those "Pussy-ass Tests".

Music:

That new Animal Collective is on repeat. UGK, Bill Callahan, The Associates are on repeat.

Movies:

Chris Marker's Sans Soleil, Billy Madison, The Tenant by Polanski; Fritz Lang's Metropolis, Jacques Rivette's Celine and Julie Go Boating, Tati's Playtime, Herzog, Kubrick, Kiorstami, Todd Haynes' Safe, Cronenberg, Bergman, Michael Haneke, anything written by Charlie Kaufmann. Pre-1980 Woody Allen, Milos Foreman's Amadeus, Todd Solondz, Hal Hartley, Jim Jarmusch's Dead Man Walking, Wet Hot American Summer, Alfred Hitchcock, Errol Morris, Fellini, Werner Rainer Fassbinder, Society. Dario Argento, Claire Denis, Paul Voerhoven, Gus Van Sant, Sam Peckinpah, Sam Fuller, Lars Von Trier, Wickerman, Anchorman, John Cassavettes, Robert Bresson, Mike Kelley, FUBAR, Ratcatcher, Morvern Callar, Pee Wee Herman's Big Adventure, The Cook The Thief His Wife and Her Lover, P.T. Anderson, Wes Anderson, Terence Malik, David Lynch, Ingmar Bergman's Fanny and Alexander, The Long Goodbye by Robert Altman, Jackass 1 and 2, El Topo, Eyes Without a Face

Television:

Six Feet Under, Office, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Will & Grace, Animal Planet. Curb Your Enthusiasm. The Zach Galfianakis Show (RIP):

Books:

Eckhardt Tolle, Lydia Davis, Georges Perec, Michel Houellbecq

Heroes:

Sandwich

My Blog

SPILLIN’ SEED FO’ CA$H

I got rejected today from the sperm bank. I could have made a mint if not for my steak chompin, coke snortin', psoriasis havin', Jewish paternal side.The guy on the phone was like: "I'm sorry, I have...
Posted by Max on Wed, 17 Oct 2007 06:18:00 PST

Dogs vs. Cats

I like to divide the human race into cats and dogs. It's neat and tidy. You can always tell one from the other. I used to think of myself as a dog. I probably thought that because I love dogs and do n...
Posted by Max on Tue, 16 Oct 2007 11:18:00 PST

A new expression

A co-worker of mine likes to say "Hold Your Biscuits!" when she is faced with an impatient or jumpy co-worker. This seems to imply that when one has biscuits one is likely to wolf them down very quick...
Posted by Max on Sat, 29 Sep 2007 04:00:00 PST

Another gem by Graham Foust

Poem with Pepper Spray and Bottle OpenerLike anyone's, mineis but a body fullof signals. A body fullof signals and fixingto winter. Them lemonwedges brim themselves,and something the colorof worry i...
Posted by Max on Fri, 21 Sep 2007 02:43:00 PST

Huffy

Here's a poem I saw/read about on the poet Ron Silliman's blog (http://ronsilliman.blogspot.com/). I tend to flinch at poetry, but I like this one very much. Its by Graham Foust. It's called "Huffy"Au...
Posted by Max on Sat, 15 Sep 2007 09:06:00 PST

Like a ghost bobbing for apples

Do you ever get the feeling to blog but you have nothing to say? You try anyway but it's like being constipated yet very EAGER to have a bowel movement. You may eke out a garlic knot's worth but at le...
Posted by Max on Thu, 13 Sep 2007 05:58:00 PST

Walk like a man-imal

My car broke down last week. I had to have it fixed pronto. Apparently because I failed to put oil in it and nearly destroyed my transmission. Me+car=idiot.However, after dropping the chariot off at t...
Posted by Max on Tue, 28 Aug 2007 03:21:00 PST

Total eclipse of the moon

Last night I stayed up late like Galileo to take pix of the lunar eclipse with my trusty point and shoot.When fully eclipsed it kinda looked that hunk of cheese was doused in amber. Half eclipseThis i...
Posted by Max on Tue, 28 Aug 2007 12:53:00 PST

Fun with Catscan machines while fingering myself

These pics are from my recent appearance at the the local radiology bar one night. I was just passing by the booth with a 40 looking for funtime. I was, like, so drunk and just had to go into the cat ...
Posted by Max on Sat, 25 Aug 2007 12:23:00 PST

This exists

I'll be keeping this handy just in case I ever get married. You should too. I wonder if a new a mag will come out called "AIDS today", "Mid-Life Crisis Weekly", or "Cancer Magazine" next? It's about t...
Posted by Max on Thu, 16 Aug 2007 11:14:00 PST