YOUR OFFICIAL FRED G. SANFORD.

I was born in st Louis,moved to watts,its in los angles,calf,for those who don't know were watts is,just me and my beautiful wife Elizabeth;there we had a handsome dummy,i mean son,which she wanted to name him Lamont,soon after we had the little dummy,i mean Lamont my beautiful wife took sick and passed away,so i had to raise the little dummy,i mean Lamont,all by myself,i do it again to,he was a good little dummy.Money was hard to come by in those days,sometimes i had to work two jobs just to make ends meet,got a job picking up trash,Grady drove the truck and Lamont,rode up their with him,still wasn't enough so i got a job as a male stripper at night,(it's tough in a room ful of horny,old women trying to grap you man hood!)had to quit that job,dam near f... myself to death! Then it came to me another mans junk could be another mans junk,from there the empire was born! Thus it shall be SANFORD&SON SALVAGE.its was still hard working and taking care of the little dummy,so i call on my sister-law Esther,what a major f...-up,that would turn out to be.one day when i was junking a Hollywood producer came by and wanted to make a t.v. show about me and my dummy for a son,and for a small sum,we let him.Lamont is still out on the truck all day,he's a good son,to be a big dummy,and Esther,well,she still UGLY!Bubba AND Grady still comes by and we go down to the pool-hall,and shoot some with skillet and Leroy.and now you know the rest of the story! who i like to meet? THE GREAT LENA HORNE, and women i never had! /a