Cthulhu Kirby profile picture

Cthulhu Kirby

The lust for power can be just as completely satisfied by suggesting people into loving their servit

About Me

as a child i was constantly and consistently ritualistically molested by a group of organized chickens, bent on total world domination. though their plan failed to reach fruition, the scars remain to this day. mostly in the buttocks region, but some about my legs and feet.
despite this, i've matured into somewhat of a normal adult, save for the severe border line personality disorder, just barely short of being considered full blown schizophrenia, and strong sociopathic tendencies. no more than your average chicken molestation survivor, as we like to call ourselves.
in my spare time i read obsessively in a complex escapist plot to deny my interpreted reality, and develope and exist in a large scale fantasy world of my own design. I work on and explore Linux and other GNU products,for similar ends.
i enjoy staring for long periods of time at light colored walls, seeking to empty my mind, not un-like characters featured in the film The Matrix, but without the exemplar fashion sense or military grade weapons.
recently i started attending a kung fu class in ames. i have studied a few different martial arts over the years, since i was about 22? 23? matsumura kenpo for a number of years in seattle, and some brief attempts at hung gar in san francisco, and a spot of tai chi. i haven't been active in martial arts (or anything, really)in some time, and i feel i am working my way to a solid stroke and/or heart attack. party on!
One Year Later... i've been taking a break from kung fu for awhile. well, more like a break from driving 45 minutes one way to ames for kung fu. kirby is, after all, a lazy kirby.
yet, i continue to increase the detachment from reality i have so lovingly worked on for years. It's shaping up to be a comfortable place to non-exist.
aside from reading myself that much further away from day to day awareness, i function as Fan Boy Number One on Neal Asher's blog plans continue to haul all my asher first editions to the UK for signing...

My Interests

burning you, picnics, glass eating, puzzles, chess, never revealing the location of the body, bowling, necrophilia, tennis.

I'd like to meet:

"a girl, made of breasts..." --Eddie Izzard

Music:

i'm not sure what it's called but it plays constantly in my head.

Morrissey and The Smiths. The Cure. Depeche Mode. Information Society. Echo and the Bunnymen, The Decemberists, Billy Idol

Descendents, All, Misfits, Fugazi, Nirvana, REM, Violent Femmes, Janes Addiction, miracles of god (with jason "not dead" hennesy)

more to come.

Movies:

i'm not sure i like these new "talkies" plus, where's the damn cowboy movies? huh? huh?

Gods and Monsters Shaun of the Dead Wonder boys Donnie Darko Army of Darkness Romeo Must Die

Television:

i will not tolerate cable or antenna, so the movies i play on it(all very tasteful and good.). and video games. (mmm FF$)

oh and the porn.

just kidding. that's what the internet is for.

Books:

this is going to take awhile to do properly. some authors of note for now:
Neal Asher (My Buddy Neal Asher.) Chuck Palahniuk, Immanuel Kant, Craig Clevenger, Amy Hempel. Michael Chabon (i have pretty much everything he has written signed, thanks to meeting him at the UW bookstore in seattle. and damn him for still having a full head of sexy sexy hair.) William Gibson, Richard Morgan, Hesse, John Courtney Grimwood, Douglas Adams, Edword Gorey, Howard Philip Lovecraft, Ramsey Campbell, Neal Stephenson, Robert W. Chambers, Thomas Pynchon, Richard Calder(dead girls), Philip K Dick, Joe Connelly (bringing out the dead),Gary Zukav ( The Dancing Wu Li Masters : An Overview of the New Physics ), Bruce Bethke (Headcrash), John Crowley, Yann Martel (life of Pi), Mark Haddon (The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night), Jeffrey Eugenides (Middlesex: A Novel), Glen Gold (Carter Beats the Devil),Oscar Wilde, Robert Heinlein, Orson Scott Card (ender's game), Christopher Bram (Father of Frankenstein), John Kennedy Toole (A Confederacy of Dunces, The Neon Bible) Kung Fu High School by Ryan Gattis, Mark Salzman, anything he wrote, but especially "The Laughing Sutra", David Chadwick's "Thank you and OK: An American Zen Failure in Japan", John Crowley, Mil Millington, Yukio Mishima, Christopher Moore, I, Lucifer by Glen Duncan, James Clavell
more to come

Heroes:

no one that had anything to do with the holocaust. "...and Hitler died in a ditch covered in petrol, on fire. so that's fun. i mean, that's funny. because he was a mass murdering fuck head." --eddie izzard

Jason Hennesy

Eric Blair

Jet Li

My Dog

Ted Bundy, because Nothing's Shocking. Free Ted Bundy! Free Ted.. hmm? what? he's what?! they did?! oh... um.. Avenge Ted Bundy! Avenge... huh? he did *what* to *who*? you're kidding... that's pretty messed up...whoa, more than once?! 36?! ... Down with Bundy! Boo Ted!

My Blog

finally a magazine for toaster...


Posted by Cthulhu Kirby on Fri, 26 Oct 2007 07:23:00 PST

cant hurt


Posted by Cthulhu Kirby on Sat, 13 Oct 2007 08:28:00 PST

mmmm... water...

Mr. Asher recently posted on his blog several good points on plastics ,*and* he mentions one of my top pet peeves, bottled water. I thought this would be a good time to ask our friends Penn and Telle...
Posted by Cthulhu Kirby on Sat, 22 Sep 2007 09:41:00 PST

The Cat in the Hat

For some months now, i have been marveling about a new hats ability to attract cat hair. I mean, i *know* a black flat cap, and a white mid range length haired cat are not friends, but it seems to me...
Posted by Cthulhu Kirby on Mon, 10 Sep 2007 07:57:00 PST

Why I love Neal Asher

This is from Neal's Blog today, September 07 2007. It's Pen and Tellers Bullshit covering Global warming.Please Click Here and watch this episode....
Posted by Cthulhu Kirby on Fri, 07 Sep 2007 07:49:00 PST

my favorite kind...


Posted by Cthulhu Kirby on Sat, 18 Aug 2007 06:21:00 PST

OsanaCon 2007 aka Bachelor Party


Posted by Cthulhu Kirby on Mon, 13 Aug 2007 08:52:00 PST

I was in very Rural Wisconsin yesterday...

I saw some very disturbing road signs while driving through parts of rural Wisconsin yesterday, and felt i should share them with you....
Posted by Cthulhu Kirby on Fri, 03 Aug 2007 07:49:00 PST

men with candy...


Posted by Cthulhu Kirby on Tue, 31 Jul 2007 03:50:00 PST

nice things about living in rural iowa

That would be family.Home for a short visit, Shane Hill, fortunate enough to be related to *me*, a cousin no less, was honored in his small home town with being a MC in their annual parade. His rank e...
Posted by Cthulhu Kirby on Sun, 22 Jul 2007 03:17:00 PST