"Less concerned about
fitting into the world,
Your world that is..."
Every conscious moment I have is devoted to creativity. I have an
artistic soul that never rests. Never. I suffer from reocurring dreams, panic attacks, and hypochondria. I'm a night owl. I'd like to say that I'm a vampire, but lord knows, they don't exist, do they? ;) I have some very good friends that I love with all my heart, but I'd just like to point out, that no one really knows me. Although I may be an open book when it comes to conversations, there's still a completely hidden world embedded beneath my tired, makeup-drenched surface. There's dark parts of me...I have a very gothic and gloomy soul. But, there's also very light parts of me. The light in me hasn't been shining too much lately. In fact, I think my light was misplaced a couple of years ago. If you're wondering where it is, go and question the boy who stole it.
I'm one of the nicest chicks you'll ever meet. I'm never mean to anyone, unless they've fucked with me first. I give everyone hugs. I love hugs...seriously. If hugs were able to be sent by mail, that'd be the greatest thing since sliced bread. I give everyone a chance and I'm very open-minded. I'm really spontaneous and adventurous, and after getting to know me, you'll love that fact. I LIVE for adventure, actually, and I try to make the best out of every outing that I have. I hate being at home. Especially when I'm home alone, I feel like a prisoner. That's not any good for me, because I'm a free spirit.
I have the two most awesome parents in the entire world, and all of my friends consider themselves adopted after meeting them. They're the only reason why sometimes, I get by with murder. I don't know what I'd do without them. I'm afraid of almost everything...afraid of living, afraid of dying, afraid of losing my sanity. I'm on the edge of losing it everyday. I've gone through a series of bad relationships, one of which I still have yet to fully recover from. Funny...the shortest of romances are always the hardest to let go of.
Music, films, and books consume my life. Going to horror conventions, concerts, and shows is what I breathe for. My friend Amanda and I make indie horror films. She's an absolute genius. I'd do anything to have just 1/3 of her fantastic brain. Look forward to seeing trailers for our films in the near future. Believe me, we're definitely working on it. I dabble a little in piano and keys. I'm writing song lyrics constantly, as well as trying my best to put some simple music to them. I'm dying to share my songs with somebody, but I can't let them out until I have them just right. I need to start a band. My songs won't be complete unless I have other great minds to help me finish them. :)
I break a lot of fashion rules. People say I wear too much makeup and dress up too often. I honestly don't care what anyone thinks. Only my opinion of myself matters, and I laugh at those who send me hatemail, thinking they're actually bringing me down. Haha! Keep the hatemail coming, girls! All it does is waste your time and give me feelings of utter amusement. You will never win, sorry. It just makes you look like an ass. Glamour is another huge part of me that I'll never let anyone destroy, no matter how hard they try. I'm really into photography, as well as modeling and cosmetology, and those three are things I would love to pursue, even if they're side jobs or hobbies. Fame or no fame, money or no money, I'm going to keep doing what I love...forever.
If you've read this far, I feel so sorry for you. Haha. I don't mean to bore you. If you'd like to know me a little better, all you have to do is message me. Don't take it personally if I don't respond right away, I don't ignore anyone. However, if I do not answer your phone calls right away, I would take that personally. Ha. Either way, I'll get to you as soon as I can!