Beau

Open, unguarded, and always ready to laugh! I'm a musician and grew up with musician parents whom I happen to love beyond words. Both of them are best friends in my life. Music is huge for me and not being able to play would be the same as not being able to breathe. I love to cook also. My love for cooking is almost as strong as my love for music. Actually, I just recently finished the final draft of my cookbook and I'm going to try to self publish it. Cooking for me is very meditative and I feel extremely comfortable and relaxed in the kitchen. One thing that suprises many people when I tell them is that I was an elementary teacher for six years. I think the surprise comes from the long hair, earings, and tattoos, but it's all good. I understand. I was trained and got my teaching certificate in grades 1st through 3rd, but I floated from the toddler classroom through the 6th grade classroom when needed. I loved those kids. It was an amazing experience that I'll never forget. Not only was I able to expose them to knowledge, but I relearned things that I didnt really get the first time around in my own schooling. How freakin cool is that! So, that pretty much sums up what I've been doing with my life since high school. On a more personal level, I've been in many relationships, and don't regret one. The reason is simple. I've learned so much about women, and more importantly, myself. Don't misunderstand me when I say I've learned about women. Honestly, I might have maybe tapped 15 to 20 % of the womans psyche... maybe! The most important thing I learned is this (guys pay attention). Listen... just listen! Don't try to fix! Just listen! Because if you listen, only then will you begin to understand, and only then will you be able to comfort and move on to other things. More fun things! Oh ya, and make sure that you brush your teeth, take showers, clip those nails, and for God's sake clip the nose hairs and any other areas that might need it! Women do it. No reason why we shouldn't either. I almost forgot the 4th most important rule of life... if you bring beer home from the store, for everything thats holy, put it in the damn fridge, first thing, no exceptiions! Thank you for reading!
Refrigerator Thoughts
by
Beau Melia~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Are you a victim by your own excuses, or are you a hero by your own virtue? Do you choose to be a victim today, or do you choose to be responsible?
Make this choice and it will determine your day.
How?
Stop protecting yourself. What can possibly hurt you, if you are unwilling to be vulnerable?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~What defines a victim?
A victim searches for acceptable answers outside of themselves for justification. Think about this carefully!
How do I know if I’m a victim?
Have you blamed anyone or anything for your current feelings in the last twenty-four hours?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~What is responsibility?
In simplicity, responsibility is a choice; in complexity, a choice which only you have power of.
How do I choose to be responsible?
Aren’t you sick and tired of not being responsible? Accomplish what you most desire!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~What do I most desire?
A sigh of relief that produces a smile in everything you do.
How do I experience this sense of relief?
How do you feel after the dishes are done? How do you feel after the laundry is done? How do you feel after you’ve finally called a person who has left numerous phone messages which you’ve saved, yet avoided for the past two weeks? How do you feel when you can sit back on your couch, because everything is finally accomplished? Relief?
I usually take care of these matters consistently. Why don’t I feel relieved consistently?
Do you feel relieved when the sink is overflowing with dirty dishes again, and the laundry basket is compacted so tightly that it might explode if one more sock is placed on top? Do you feel relieved when you have another message saved from someone you’d rather not talk to, but feel obligated to save it incase you just might feel like returning it? Probably not. Relief is also peace of mind, and to experience this you must practice everyday.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~My life doesn't just consist of daily household chores. I have a social life too. How do I experience peace of mind in my social life?
Your social desires aren’t far removed from your household responsibilities. These are all a part of your life and subject to how you apply them. Think about this!
Please explain.
When you procrastinate with in your household, you often procrastinate in your social life as well. When you don’t feel peace of mind within your immediate environment you feel less than what you truly are. The reason for this is because you’ve essentially accepted less of yourself, and the people in your social life notice, whether they say so or not. However, your objective is not to appease other people. The person you truly are cares about the immediate environment equally as much as the social environment. You are the person who you live with seven days a week, twenty-four hours a day. So, the objective is to feel peace of mind within yourself all the time. This is your responsibility and challenge. Anything less is accepting your victimization.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~How do I escape victimization?
Choose to be responsible for no one else, save yourself. It is a simple answer, yet often difficult to apply. However, it is just a choice. Think about it carefully, and take it slow.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~How can I choose to be responsible when the people nearest to me are choosing to be irresponsible?
Your responsibility does not involve correcting the irresponsibility of others. No matter how important someone is to your life, they are responsible for themselves. People have the power to make choices in their lives. Those choices along with the consequences are not your responsibility. It’s their life, not yours. You can be caring, but not controlling.
How can I be caring and not controlling when other people’s statements and actions directly affect my life?
Do you feel a need to defend yourself against words and actions that you, yourself don’t find plausible? Why waste time discrediting ludicrous statements. If the words and actions themselves are ludicrous, let them be just that. You don’t need to justify ridiculousness. Words and actions with damaging intentions are conceived in rage and fire. Don’t fuel that which can be easily extinguished, by simply removing acknowledgement.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~How do I make the responsible choice for me?
How do you feel? What are your feelings telling you? Be honest!
I’m confused about how I feel.
No you’re not. You’re dodging how you truly feel. You also may be hearing your true feelings, but are afraid to act on them. Stop arguing between what sounds true and what sounds easier to hear. You have a truth inside, which you’re afraid to expose, especially to yourself. Either way you’re still protecting yourself…. from yourself!
I don’t feel like I’m protecting myself. I feel like I’m being honest.
Accepting honesty and feeling honest are two different matters. It’s easy to deceive other people, yet just as easy if not easier to deceive yourself. How can you begin to listen and accept your feelings without the clarity you most seek?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~What exactly is clarity?
Clarity is realizing how you truly feel at every moment in your life. You must have clarity to acknowledge your feelings as your truth.
I don’t understand how I can see more clearly. I’m an honest person and follow my own convictions.
Do you revere your convictions as you follow them? Be honest. It’s Ok if you don’t like your answer. Just because you believe yourself to be a morally good person doesn’t mean you’re being honest with yourself. You may have an understanding of wrong and right, as you were taught. But do you positively know if your teachers were also being honest with themselves? Do you listen to all of your feelings, or just those that are comfortable to hear? To see clearly, you must listen to every feeling you experience, and listen even closer to the unpleasant ones.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Is peace found in clarity?
Peace is experienced with a clear sense of who you are. When you accept feelings as your truth, you do so through clarity, but your peace is of your own perception.
Please explain.
First let’s discuss perception. Think of perception as visiting an optometrist. After your eye examination you decide to purchase a pair of eyeglasses. Your prescription is intimate only to your eyes, and the vision through which you see is consequence of the prescription. The receipt is a declaration of your desire for a clear perception. There isn’t a universal step by step guide to the perception of peace sitting next to the chewing gum rack in any convenient store. Your perceptions about everything in your life are unique only to you, as they should be. Your perception of peace is also just as unique. Ask this question, “How do I honestly see myself; not before today, not tomorrow, but right now?” Take a few moments to think about it. Don’t leave anything out!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~How do clarity and peace relate to one another?
Think of the most beautiful picture or painting you’ve ever seen. When you view this image, even in your mind you often forget yourself due to its overwhelming beauty. Let’s call the image your peace and the frame that bounds it, your clarity. The frame's purpose is not to distract your eyes and presume focus on its self. Spend too much time on the frame and you loose the beauty to confusion. A frame by itself has no purpose except geometric emptiness. The frame in truth is complimentary and supportive. Its purpose is to direct your attention to the beautiful image, which is your peace. Your peace is experienced through the perceptional virtue in which you see the image. Think about this carefully.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Am I confined within my own perceptions?
Perception is a tricky but honest term. By definition it tells how you see yourself and the world in which you live. Perception can be your freedom and at the same time your prison. If you live through another person’s perceptions, you surrender the power to exercise your own. Perception is freedom of choice. It is the only power that determines whether we see ourselves separate from our environment or as one. This is the most complex concept to simplify. Perception is the filter through which you interpret in coming information and then expel it. Undisputedly, this is a personal issue, and consequently comes full circle back to the first question. Are you a victim by your own excuses, or a hero by your own virtue? Every question that has been asked has been based on how you perceive yourself. Every response has been based on how honestly you’re willing to answer the question.

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