In the heat of the harsh African plains, a pack of lions roamed the dry Earth in search of a cooler environment. As they treaded the ground they came across a basket wrapped in white cloth. Curious, but not too curious (afterall they knew the old saying 'curiousity killed the cat'), they inspected the basket for a short time, and marched on.
Several years later, zoologists exploring these plains stumbled upon what could be known as the greatest lion massacre ever. There they were, the bodies of twenty-nine lions, adults and cubs, covered in blood; their genitals ripped from their origin. Nothing could prepare the zoologists for what they were about to witness next. There, atop a hill, stood what appeared to be a boy adorned in white cloth. The only visible part were his balls. He cried out in a loud voice, "OKON EKE HOO!?" His voice shot out towards the heavens, reaching out to god himsef. And the divine one answered, "You who has no name, I shall give you one, and you shall reign supreme over all humans. Your name from henceforth will be Kris, son of the prairie, king of the land, house of men. Go forth and fulfill your role." After this, Kris gained infinite knowledge of the cosmos.
