Tony Eat Something! profile picture

Tony Eat Something!

I see you're jacking off in this scenario

About Me

Is this the part where I'm supposed to say, "Is this the part where I'm supposed to say how cool I am?" My name is Tony and I tug on the heartstrings of America like a song about child abuse sung by a child. Everything I say or do is for the sole purpose of having a funny or interesting story to tell later [this is why I love it when bad things happen to me]. I was supposed to be an artist and a musician but God fucked up in the creation process. I laugh at racial slurs. I don't care if you add me without sending a message first because I crave attention and acceptance so goddamn badly. I would prefer it if everyone wanted to fuck me. Fun Fact: There is no sales tax on clothes in Massachusetts!

My Interests

New England Wisdom: Optimism is like a slippery floor. Sure, it's shiny but you're going to fall on your ass...wicked hard. (that is James being brilliant and sober)i like things like Miranda July, music, books, magazines, movies that are in some way disturbing, sushi, red bull, coffee, cigarettes, and attractive people.I also like to eat sandwiches, particularly tuna melts with goat cheese. I live for goat cheese. I also enjoy proscuitto, but to a lesser extent.

I'd like to meet:

Someone who will treat me badly and make me feel like shit about myself, preferrably someone who won't call me the next day. Already having a boyfriend is a big plus. If you fit this description, what are you doing later?

Music:

Bjork [the sugarcubes, kukl] Tori Amos Portishead PJ Harvey Radiohead Sigur Ros Air Kraftwerk Gravy Train!!!! Avenue D Le Tigre Ladytron Tracy + the Plastics Peaches M.I.A. the Faint Yeah Yeah Yeah's Pixies Sonic Youth Ciccone Youth Charming Hostess Sleepytime Gorilla Museum Carla Kihlstedt Ex-Girl Polysics The Boredoms Melt Banana Erase Errata The Gossip Bikini Kill Sleater-Kinney The Rapture Fantomas Mr. Bungle Faith No More Peeping Tom anything else Mike Patton has ever done Cold War Kids Mindless Self Indulgence Sarah AultThe Dresden Dolls Rasputina Jack Off Jill Marilyn Manson Switchblade Symphony Snake River Conspiracy Cibo Matto Muse Sublime TV on the Radio Modest Mouse The Moldy Peaches Blonde Redhead The Arcade Fire The Fiery Furnaces The Kills Pulp Monsters are Waiting Mellowdrone Edith Piaf Morrissey/The Smiths Siouxie and the Banshees David Bowie Patti Smith Lou Reed Fiona Apple Regina Spektor CocoRosie Ambulance Ltd. Jesus and Mary Chain, Lords of Acid My Life With the Thrill Kill Kult fuuuuck i love My Bloody Valentine! I could go on but I'm bored.

Movies:

films by :John Waters Woody Allen Harmony Korine Andy Warhol/Paul Morrissey Tim Burton Gregg Araki Quintin Tarantino and I like Me and You and Everyone We Know Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion Spinal Tap Heathers Clueless Elvira Mistress of the Dark Death Becomes Her Wet Hot American Summer Beyond the Valley of the Dolls Harold and Maude Dude, Where's My Car?

Television:

I hate TV, but love Strangers With Candy Reno 911 The Simpsons The Critic Golden Girls Sex and the City The State The Maxx Jem and the Hollograms My So-Called Life Just Say Julie Get a Life

Books:

David Sedaris, Augusten Borroughs, Bret Easton Ellis, Chuck Palahniuk, JT Leroy (particularly Howard's End), The Tao of Pooh by Benjamin Hoff, and Wigfield by Amy Sedaris, Paul Dinello, and Steven Colbert.

My Blog

Over-Caffeinated and Self-Indulgent

So, possessing the aformentioned qualities, and killing time before i have to get ready, I contemplated filling out a survey, but they ask the most pointless questions! Who the fuck cares what my shoe...
Posted by Tony Eat Something! on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST