Dissident Zef profile picture

Dissident Zef

I come from a timeless place, at 4:30.

About Me

As hard as it is to sometimes admit, you and I are the same. We are one energy, one breath, one mind, all too often divided against one another. Have I wronged you? I have more so wronged myself, because when i slight you, I slight my self. The self is infinite and universal. No-thing is too small or too large or too nonexistent to not be a part of the great mystery.

My Interests

Taking, viewing, and manipulating seemingly nebulous images. drawing, writing, painting, dreaming (lucid and day), Pretending to meditate, drifting through oblivion. Finding a way out. Dealing with right now, later. No-Thingness. Transcendence. Figuring out how to have that feeling again without doing that again. Sticking it to the MAN while trying to remember that I am responsible for my own life and am probably just as much the MAN as everyone else.

I'd like to meet:

someone that melts my every barrier. Someone that puts me at ease, but excites me just as much. Someone who can hold a conversation and make me think twice about long held beliefs. Someone who can stimulate my imagination with their creativity. Someone who can "span time" with me in silent comfort. Someone who loves music and is always looking for something new, but it is just as happy listening to the room mantra. Someone who's eyes say they love me as much as their actions. Someone who is entirely themselves, always and without apology. Someone who can be some of these things, but not a lot of what the rest implies I am not looking for.

Music:

I can't really hear anything over the loudness of my own inner voices. But when I do manage to shut them up. NIN. MARILYN MANSON. TOOL. PHAROAH SANDERS. NEUTRAL MILK HOTEL. Pearl Jam, Pink Floyd, K.K.Null, Lab Partners, The Black Cloud, Brainiac, a ten o'clock scholar, Leon XLR, Leon Lysergic, Tricky (the first two cds),come, blonde readhead, early soundgarden, alice in chains, Plastikman, aphex twin, blind melon, ministry, neurosis, tribes of neurot, spiritualized, Bob Log III, Tool, velvet underground, david bowie, the stooges, mazzy star, MONSTER MAGNET. SONIC YOUTH. PJ HARVEY. RADIOHEAD. NIRVANA. DROGE VULCIFERNAC. Red Sparowes, God is an Astronaut, Ornette Coleman, Cecil Taylor (air above mountains), mogwai, Explosions in the Sky, Cat Powers, Bjork, early tori amos, Low, Angels in heavy syrup, STP, Pendereki, Sixfingersatellite, re-god, John coltrane, Miles Davis, SYR, Charles Mingus, Royal Trux, The Cows, Cherubs, lowercase, tom petty, the doors, jimi hendrix, fantamos, faith no more, mike patton, Will Davis, jane's addiction, modest mouse, wu tang clan, method man, rza, ODB, GZA, Deltron 3030, andre3000, A Perfect Circle, Queens of the Stone Age, Foo Fighters, mercury rev, skullflower, nurses with wound, did I say tool, portishead, primus, melvins, always so many more, more, more, more, lots that I haven't heard enough of, but would always like to hear more...always open to hear more. Looking for new or old music that I haven't heard before. oh Bob Dylan, the beatles, John lennon, And I will listen to your band before I add you to a favorite not as a friend unless I am your friend, such as the few bands I have as friends. I am actually upset that I can't remember them all. Some I haven't heard in so long I've forgotten their names, but just let me hear it...heaven. just sitting and listening to the aural sounds of the universe, hearing words without meaning, their tones converging, convolving, convoluting, dispersing, echoing, erradicating, chirping (birds), insects, frogs, lizards (do they make sounds? If so I wanna hear it), broken electronics, dead radio, white noise, pink noise, static, feedback, silence, the music of the spheres, Gabriel's trumpets, a tribe called quest, me when no one is around, noise from ventilation fans, water through pipes, spectrum, spaceman 3, oh well....the list will never end.

Movies:

Imaginary Heroes. NAKED LUNCH. Existenz. Apocalypse Now (which I first saw when I was nine). Lost in Translation. Adapation. broken flowers, The life Aquatic, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Being John Malcovich. Brasil. Requiem for a Dream. Crash. Crash, American Beauty. Beautiful Mind. Lost Highway, Mulhuland Drive, Eraserhead, Twin peaks fire walk with me, anything by david lynch, The Doors, Pulp fiction, Frisk, reservoir dogs, heathers, Fear and loathing in Las Vegas, true romance, alien, aliens, alien3, aliens4, the unfilmed alien3 (gibson script), hellraiser I and II, Tool videos, marilyn manson videos, el topo, 2001, raiders of the lost ark, goonies, ET, old b/w movies, kill bill volumes I and II, seymor butts porns, STRANGE THAN FICTION, many woody allen movies, ...I've seen so many that I loved, but these are the ones that come to mind.when I am in the right mood, sappy romantic comedies. Independent movies where someone always dies in the first ten minutes and they spend the rest of the movie dealing with it.All the other movies that make me seem cool for liking them, even though I didn't make them, which makes me little more than a financial sponsor to those who did and an occasional thief who deprives everyone down to the grip of his/her living.tell me whatelse should I like? I'll watch then decide for myself.

Television:

Much like Elvis, I think tv's are good for shooting and as a means to watch DVDs before you shoot them, or throw mic stands at them (keven.333!!!).

Books:

Authors: William Burroughs, Clive Barker, Phillip K. Dick. Lao Tzu, Marilyn Manson (most anthing by them). William Gibson- Neuromancer. The Watchmen. ACID DREAMS. stephen leberge's lucid dreaming books, Lucid Dreaming by malcolm godwin, robert johnson inner work, poetry by rummi, e.e. cummings, william blake, carl jung, buddha-dharma, bhagadvagita....

Heroes:

I just wanna save myself. But really, everyone in some way is heroic from living in the face of the unknown.

My Blog

another sculpture

Title: Manipulation Device no. 1 (actually a prototype for future mp devices.).  It can be orientated in four different configurations.  Below are two:...
Posted by Dissident Zef on Wed, 30 Jul 2008 08:43:00 PST

my new sculpture

I just finished this steel sculpture. It weighs approx. 600lbs. the base is buried beneath the brick chips. It still needs to rust more, but it will only look better with time. It is currently place...
Posted by Dissident Zef on Thu, 12 Jun 2008 01:52:00 PST

my horn

toot ( http://www.capefearstudios.com/exhibits.html)no longer posted.  I was a featured artist of the month at Cape Fear studios in NC....
Posted by Dissident Zef on Wed, 26 Mar 2008 07:40:00 PST

weightless mysteries

dark revisionsschemes of realityskipping off the surface of make believe memorieshurtling through the vast uncertainties of man’s mysteriesideas are putty molded and made solid only if let to dr...
Posted by Dissident Zef on Tue, 18 Mar 2008 09:24:00 PST

...because all the darkness came out

dividing truth and circumstancewith overwraught pleas for safetyfrom homemade treasons and failuresthe cries can be heardas banshees screaming in the darkness in hopes of keeping demons at bayall the ...
Posted by Dissident Zef on Sat, 08 Mar 2008 10:00:00 PST

checking in with self (rusty poetics and dischordant thoughts)

wanting to existbut not behind wallsmeant to contain my fears  but really keeping me from living There is no aloneall energy co-minglesbut so subtley we are unaware   just how close we reall...
Posted by Dissident Zef on Sun, 17 Feb 2008 10:41:00 PST

a formal goodbye (to love not lost nor ever possessed)

simple movements across the surface of my skingestures entwined with meaning and intentmemories of nights shared in breathless abandonreplaced by the still calm nothing of nowwhat I could not feel in ...
Posted by Dissident Zef on Wed, 20 Feb 2008 09:56:00 PST

Digital digitalis

My computer is dead.  My cell phone is dead.  Somehow, I remain breathing.  Somehow I've adapted.  School use of computers, work use of phone.  Sad attempts at holding on to t...
Posted by Dissident Zef on Wed, 01 Aug 2007 05:26:00 PST

how imperfectly perfect

How perfectly the space between usdescribes the nature of our relationship,full of potential encouraged by each passing gesture.How it snugs so tightly up against our formsinsinuating itself into ever...
Posted by Dissident Zef on Tue, 13 Mar 2007 08:15:00 PST

(in) time, ( I ) will devour you, too.

concentric deprivationThe Self-chosen re-invent eden with their feelings of separation.  They wantonly manipulate the collective data feed, twisting the globe in hopes of avoiding a non-white dom...
Posted by Dissident Zef on Sun, 04 Mar 2007 08:27:00 PST