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"It takes a lifetime to earn trust, but only a few seconds to lose it." Insanity is defined as doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.
In other words, if you want what you've always had...do what you've always done...if you want what you've never had...do what you've never done...if you want what you once had...do what you once did. . "We are what we repeatedly do; excellence, therefore, is not an act, but a habit." - Aristotle ...one thing I do, letting go those things which are past, and stretching out to the things which are before...
Philippians 3:13
I am just a regular (messed up / broken) 31 year old guy currently residing in Aurora, CO. There is nothing special or extraordinary about me other than the fact that I have been blessed with two incredible kids!
The older I get the more I realize just how stupid I can be and how my decisions can adversely effect the lives of those around me, specifically those I care the most about. I thoroughly enjoy playing volleyball, hanging out with my friends, and have a passion for doing church a little bit differently (okay....A LOT differently).
It is my personal opinion that the average persons perception of church and Jesus are completely skewed because of the lifestyles of those who call themselves Christians (including myself). It is for that very reason that I do not consider myself a religious person. I personally hate religion, but LOVE GOD ! I'm extremely passionate about God, his love for me, and his purpose / plan for my life...but through this journey called life that we are all on, I find myself often distracted by the stresses and cares of everything that really doesn't matter. I find myself compromised, guilty, and ashamed of my actions. In the Bible (Romans 7), one of the writers puts it this way: �I do not understand my own actions because I do not do what I want to. But I do the very thing that I hate. � I can will what is right but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good that I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do. Now, if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who does it but the sin that dwells within me. � Wretched person that I am. Who will rescue me from this body of death, from this life of sin? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord.�
When Dr. Douglas Anderson was asked if he had any insights on Romans 7 based on his own personal or professional life he said:
O yes. I know that passage well. In my line of work as a counselor, I talk to many people who are stuck. They are stuck in a rut. They have intentions to act in a certain way but their actual experiences contradict their intentions. They have these good intentions to love a neighbor or a spouse, but they look at their actual experiences and track record. They says, �I have not done what I intended to do. I am stuck in a rut: I have good intentions but I do not do them.� �There is this clash between intentions and reality. We human beings are so full of self-contradictions: wanting to do what is right but not doing it.
Jimmie Carter, when he was President of the United States and also the most famous Bible teacher in the Baptist church, made the front page of TIME magazine by confessing he still had feelings of lust, even though happily married. He didn�t want to have such feelings. Neither do I. Neither do you. But in reality, we have them.
So I come to the conclusion: what kind of a Christian am I anyhow? I must not be a very good Christian. I must be a weak Christian. I must be a compromising Christian. I must be a sinful, imperfect Christian. What is wrong with me? Who am I to get up and preach about the Bible? Why are there so many contradictions living inside of me. How can I honestly claim to be passionate about Christ and make the horrible mistakes that I make? What kind of a man is this that lives inside of me?
We all have these kinds of inner struggles within ourselves. You have yours; I have mine.
Now, who is it that wrote these words? �That which I want to do, I do not do. And that which I hate to do is exactly what I do.� Who is it that wrote these words? Was it some seventeen year old kid who was off parked with his girlfriend one night and he discovered his hormones were stronger than the Holy Spirit? Was it some newly �born again� Christian who was a recent Christian convert? Was this written by some TV evangelist who pompously parades around on some platform, preaching and pretending that all of these temptations have left him?
Most of us know that the man who wrote these words was the Apostle Paul. Here he was at the very high point of his life. Fifty-five to sixty-five years old; a mature Christian; he had been a Christian for some twenty to twenty-five years. Here was the Apostle Paul who prayed fervently, who worked mighty miracles, who wrote numerous letters to the churches. Here was Paul who spoke courageously before governments, kings, and rulers. Here was Paul who was tossed into prison, beaten and stoned. Here was Paul, the most mature person of the Christ-centered life, at the high point of his Christian, at the top of his game, at the top of his A game (to use an analogy from golf) saying, �I don�t get it. I do not get it. I do the things that I hate. And the very things that I want to do, I don�t do. That which I don�t want to do, I do. What is wrong with me? What a wretched person?�
According to the Apostle Paul, a mark of a mature Christian is that a person continues to struggle with sin until your dying day. This is not a sign of Christian immaturity, not a sign of Christian weakness, not a sign of Christian double mindedness and doubt. This is a mark of a real Christian who lives in a real world and has real feelings inside and real awareness of himself or herself. Yes, we know that we struggle with it.
So here we are. The Apostle Paul, at the very top of his life, at the top of his game, at the very apex of his Christian life, when he was writing the finest letter that he had ever written, he says, �What is wrong with me? How come? The very good that I want to do, I do not do. That which I don�t want to do, is precisely what I do.� The Apostle Paul, who was the most mature Christian in his era, was writing these words.
But � is that all there is? That we struggle with sin? No, not at all. That is Romans, chapter seven. Chapter seven sets the table for chapter eight. Chapter seven is a prelude for chapter eight. At the end of chapter seven, he adds the transitional verse: �Thanks be to God for Jesus Christ our Lord.� If you move into Romans, chapter eight, you will discover Paul talking about the power of the Holy Spirit. The power of the Holy Spirit that comes into your life and gives you strength and he talks about the Holy Spirit who helps you get over your alcoholism, your drug addictions, your lying, your cheating, your bad habits. He talks about the Holy Spirit who helps you get control of those destructive behaviors that are hurting your family, your marriage, your relationships, yourself and hurting you in so many different ways. Paul talks about the Holy Spirit coming into you and strengthening you and helping you to do what is right. He talks about the Holy Spirit, forgiving you through the death of Christ on the cross.
But meanwhile, back at the ranch, based on chapter seven, we remain sinners. At the same time, we remain with our self-contradictions. Even after you have memorized all the verses of chapter eight; even after you have assimilated chapter eight; even after you have put chapter eight into practice in your life, chapter seven still stands. You still live with the truth from chapter seven. You never can escape the civil war inside of you.
Martin Luther understood this well, when he used this Latin phrase that sounds like this: �simil Justus epecator.� It was a very famous phrase during the Reformation. Simil Justus Epecator.� Simultaneously, saint and sinner. Simultaneously, when you are a saint, you are also a sinner. This phrase is true. You, as a Christian, are going to struggle with the sin inside of you until your dying day. That is just the way it is.
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NOTE TO RELIGIOUS PEOPLE
(please read before emailing me)
I am not on here to get into theological debates over disputable matters...I am on here to show the love of God and let everyone know that Jesus loves them regardless of how bad they have messed up.
While most religious people that email me preface their comments with "I'm not being judgmental, but..." and may not be intentionally trying to pass judgment on me, know that following is my position (based on scripture):
(Romans 14:1, 4, 12, 22)
Accept him whose faith is weak, without passing judgment on disputable matters...Who are you to judge someone else's servant? To his own master he stands or falls...So then each of us will give an account of himself to God...So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God.
If you are still itching to send me an email because you disagree with my methodology please read my beliefs and watch the " Religion Bytes " video first. They will answer 99% of your questions and let you know exactly where I am coming from. click here to view our beliefs
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P.S. Thanks for checking out my page. While I hope it's been an inspiration know that I'm not on myspace.com for any other reason than share my journey and hopefully inspire you to not believe the lies people have said about you. To help you realize that you truly have a purpose and a divine destiny and regardless of how bad you have screwed up you can still become all that God has created you to be!
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