~~SUPERMommyANna~~

For the longest time, I've struggled so much on how I can relay myself in black and white.. So much to say, so much to share can't figure out where to begin.. I'm not your typical average "girl next door" chum.. Hardships, struggles, difficulties and pains molded me to become a better, wiser, smarter and stronger person that I am now. Growing up, I've learned so much about my life and what it's all about that it made me extremely ambitious,persistent and determined. It made me very adaptable and versatile in a way that I now know how to re-survey a situation and take a different approach if necessary. Should my approach not be successful or my career fail, I will simply use my adaptive skills to quickly move and leave the bad experience behind. It taught me all the tricks that you can possibly phatom so I can play the cards right that are dealt to me. I also learned that being flexible and knowing my limitations will help me reach my goals. I know what I'm capable of and this is what I set out for. Good or bad experiences, I see to it that there is something to be gained..WISDOM that is. It's been tough growing up from a broken family. It's never been easy! It's hard to find that sense of belongingness and security. You tend to lose your own self identity in the mids of chaos trying to figure out what's right from what's wrong.. who should you look up to and who's the best person to listen to. It's funny when someone older than you tells you one thing and do exactly the opposite. I mean so much for being a good example, aye! Until you start creating your own ideal perception of Personal Values as you start living your own life without the people that make your world wishy-washy and topsy-turvy. And that's exactly how I became fiercely independent. By the grace of God I started challenging myself to be able to accomplish anything I set my mind to, to give my all and to never give up no matter how difficult and risky the hindrances and obstacles I may encounter and come across along the way. I know I have a powerful insticts and so I trust my own gut feeling. Then, I fell in-love being on my own. I actually preferred living on my own coz in that way there is never any issue of who controls what at home. And being the person that I am, I'm all about control. I need to be in control at all times. It gives me that feeling of being safe and at-ease. And in a way, I know for sure that things are getting done accurately and sufficiently according to my set standards. I know how I sound but that's just the way I am. I got it from my dad and my grandma, they're both perfectionists and very meticulous in everything they do and so they instilled in me how to become systematic, orderly and organized. To be out of control is very threatening to me. Maybe because it has something to do with me having fear of failure and being unproductive. And mostly because growing up, I've been like a ping-pong ball played by an amateur players that's being thrown into different places and wrong directions. And everytime I would land onto something, I would always have to conform, follow and go abide by other people's rules and way of life. Until I reached the point wherein I can't withstand nor endure any longer and so I decided to just step up to the plate and start making a difference in the world. And that's why most people misunderstood me. Close family and friends have known me for my forceful and powerful drive to succeed and my amazing dedication in almost about everything I do. Although I still am in the process of trying to understand myself through finding a deeper purpose in life. I am a deep thinker.. I have intense personality and there is always more than meets the eye. I usually present a cold, detached and unemotional air to the world yet lying underneath me is tremendous power, extreme strength, intense passion, a strong will and a persistent drive. People that I respect and hold close to me is usually treated with amazing kindness,loyalty and generosity. I always remember a kind gesture forever and repay it twice the fold. Any kind selfless gesture done to me will gain trust and respect which is extremely important to me in any relationship, either romantic or not. I'm all about being a mom and a wife now. God has definitely equipped me well enough to be in this position. I'm ready to leave behind my good old days and move on.