Dez profile picture

Dez

There are two things I won't do in the bedroom: Fisting...and wear a rubber -m.o.

About Me

i have gaps in my teeth and big boobs hurt my back. i've been self-effacing since the fourth grade. i love the smell of grass and clean laundry. the last time i rode a horse was in '99. I would like to go to the San Diego Zoo, sit and watch the gorilla for an hour (with no one else around) and imagine that he is my friend.you know what else? doesn't it feel good when you are cold and SOMEONE ELSE puts a blanket on you?Mr. Lionel PrichardMy Improv World:

My Interests

i like iced coffee and improv. and everything in between.

I'd like to meet:

Phyllis Diller and Taylor Mead. at the same time.

Music:

whatever the kids are listening to. and Bjork.

Movies:

Amelie. Wet Hot American Summer. The Royal Tenebaums. The Ten. Superbad. Plan 9 from Outerspace. La Strada. Reefer Madness(classic and musical). The Five Obstructions. The Red Balloon. Life is Beautiful. Rushmore. Swing Kids. Eternal Sunshine... i could go on. and no, i haven't seen Star Wars...get over it.oh, and REEKER, 'cuz the hero is blind and not just "distant"

Television:

TV. Tig's Vagina.

Books:

Johnny Got His Gun, The Bohemian Manifesto, The Hedonist Handbook, Marat/Sade, anything by David Sedaris

Heroes:

Clark and Michael.

My Blog

yesternight

 so, stace gives the best b-day presents ever.  she got me a ticket to see Marc Broussard (a 4th for me) at B.B. King  i love this guy, especially live.  i think he might have the ...
Posted by Dez on Mon, 14 Jan 2008 07:11:00 PST

i know, i know

this was my new year's blog for last year:"Sing for Resolution I'm not listing any feats that I know for sure I won't do (ie ...
Posted by Dez on Wed, 02 Jan 2008 10:36:00 PST

My Date with a Homeless Man

It starts off simple, really. He sits across from me on the 6th train and is yelling at me in a foreign tongue. I mean, it is English, but it rolls out in jibberjabber like in fast forward. I nod off ...
Posted by Dez on Sun, 25 Nov 2007 03:25:00 PST

My Date with a Magician

As many of you know, it as been a long time fantasy of mine to date a magician. Now, I never go out looking for one as my wish is that it will be serendipitous. Like Aladdin finding a blue genie voi...
Posted by Dez on Tue, 09 Oct 2007 11:13:00 PST

Travelogcabinfever

tales of my trip (so far)I start by spending two hours at LaGuardia wandering from stand to stand looking for something, ANYTHING, to eat. "Don't eat meat? Fuck you!" is the secretly loud message all...
Posted by Dez on Fri, 10 Aug 2007 08:53:00 PST

Hey Sexy. Yo, Shorty!

That's what i like to hear at 8am on a Sunday morning as I make my commute to work.  I look like I was just forced to take a shit in the woods and then wipe it with oak, so it makes me feel good ...
Posted by Dez on Sun, 29 Apr 2007 10:28:00 PST

I Romanced Myself

    this blog is for liz, who says i should blog more.  what shall i share today? the time i had a date with myself.  it was a good time for everyone involved!  that day,...
Posted by Dez on Mon, 26 Mar 2007 02:14:00 PST

Coffee and bitching.

sometimes, i miss working at starbucks. i miss the [to me what was] normal commute at 4am and being behind the bar serving the rush hour rather than standing in line with all the venti assholes sans s...
Posted by Dez on Tue, 20 Feb 2007 09:57:00 PST

Why I would/n't make a good girlfriend...

Just because it's Valetine's Day, I got the idea to detail why I would/wouldn't be a good girlfriend. Let's start with the negatives (like you to in photography!)Negs:-I don't do massages. Give or rec...
Posted by Dez on Wed, 14 Feb 2007 07:51:00 PST

He's Just Not That in to You

so, i'm finally reading this book and (although repetitive and at times cheesy) i thought i would share some of the pearls of wisdom that i enjoyed.-Cut your losses and don't waste your time-An excuse...
Posted by Dez on Sun, 28 Jan 2007 08:04:00 PST