Karen Page (WANTS TO PLAY SHOWS!!! BOOK US!!!)

Music:

Member Since: 2/26/2007
Band Members: Jonny - Guitar
Anthony - Guitar
Rick - Bass
Chris - Drums"
Influences:

MAKE SIGNS AND SHOW US HOW MUCH YOU CARE!!

"Operator, Operator, The Phone Is Dead"
Debut Full Length Summer 2008
Recorded at Sacred Sound Studios in Martin's Ferry, OH
01. Great Scott!
02. Five Fingers of Death
03. Cock Blockula
04. Sha-Nay-Nay Has A Nosebleed
05. Horrible Wart Engorged War Torn Portable Pork Snorkler
06. Fuck Yeah!
07. Hey There Sailor! (It's The Beard)
08. Shao-Kahn-A-Tron v.s. Optimus Prime (Everybody Dance Now)
09. The Last Stand of Karen Page
10. (This Is) The Money Shot
Sounds Like: Here is what some people have said about us :-)
Send us some feedback and we'll throw it up on the page!

"Karen Page on the other hand, kinda sounded like something that came out of the ass end of a mule on burrito night, and the emo kids floating around doing their ballet added quite a bit to the un-heterosexuality."-
Name Kept Anonymous

"In all honest Karen Page, I think your music is demorilizing, and demeaning to the greater Christian economy that is vastly surpassing this valley in ethics and responsibilty, you are the irremovable mole on the music scene in the Ohio Valley, and immediate incarceration should be immediately proceeded with. We are repulsed and disgusted with you and your so called assfart burritocore, and frankly it turns our stomach to see what a mockary you have made of the local scene, you filthy vermin should be executed eastwood style and left naked hanging from a tree, especially jonny. I only wish that cory hadn't of participated in guest vocals for that beautiful ballad on your page, i think we may kick him out for associating himself with scum such as the four members on this page....May God have mercy on your hole's"
-Nova Prospect

"The only real way to describe you is if fetal alcohol syndrome met a train wreck, during one of the loudest diarrhea attacks ive ever had, That is Karen Page."
-Matt Heaton

"You guys smell like warm kool aid and taint"
-Uncle Resse

"The Songs from the Record sound like taking a shit at its best, like when you enjoy taking a shit cause you feel relieved after words. Not like pissing shit outta your asshole...ya know, kinda like what you guys normally sound like. "
-Michael

"The only way I can describe Karen Page is that it sounds like what I believe David Hasselhoff's musical interpretation of the holocaust would sound like. Fully equiped with the grinding sound of the furnaces with guns going off and the scream of the Jew to top things off. All in a sexy german accent. Karen Page is all that is anti-semitic in the musical sense, without even dealing with real Jewish people."
-Dave Caldwell

"karen page sounds like all the women ive had sex with collectively laughing at how awful my performance was"
-Ryn Rly

"if Borat started a band, it would sound like Karen Page."
-Andrew D'Cagna

"karen page sounds like....jamming staplers up an asshole.in a good way though =]love you guys.especially jon doyle.wow. what a hot piece of ass.thanks for last night =]"
-Caroline Dougherty

"You guys suck more dick than a New Jersey guido."
-Jack Shoudy

"On my part i would have to say Karen Page sounds like 2 rats fucking in a wool sock, with a slight hint of cuddlecore."
- Joey Peach.

"Imagine if Peewee Herman and that guy from the Mad TV logo had a bastard child. He's most certainly gay, and in his anal sexcapades he forgoes the traditional Anal Ease for some good ol' wood grain alcohol and metal shavings. His screams are punctuated with distressing gurgles and gasps for air, as his second favorite pastime is fully inserting a completely erect horse penis down his throat. At this point you're imagining some of the worst sounds and visions and may feel like vomiting, but I assure you: Karen Page is much worse. In fact they often make Satan cry.. like a baby. Fuck you, Karen Page. Fuck you."
-Jake The Snake

"People hate Karen Page because they make Anal Cunt sound like BananaRama."
-Sacred Sound Studio

"I hate it."
-Trevor Strnad

"ok listen. ima be honest. karen page fucking sucks ok. you guys might as well quit and split up while youre ahead. you guys make me want to cut myself. you fucking fuck, who names their band karen page. wtf? you guys sound like a ldying lesbian getting choked. matt tmjmjmjskis a bitch"
-some stupid 16 year old cunt who is a stupid whore

"If Between the Buried and Me and Every Time I Die were to have sex and have a retard daughter. It would be Karen Page!"
-Chris

"Keep begging for shows guys,,,I'm sure someone will hire you to play there backyard party soon. Good Luck"
-Five Finger Death Punch
Type of Label: None