Laura Von Awesome profile picture

Laura Von Awesome

I'm too tired... where's the fun?

About Me

This is what happens when I get bored.. feel free to take the quiz.. its half way amusing!
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Myspace Layouts at Pimp-My-Profile.com / Nurse

My Interests

.... width="425" height="350">.. .. ....>me, beer, kickin ass and takin names,your mom, 80s metal, 7 inch platform shoes, chickfila, netflix, more beer, slip and slides, jello, mini skirts, scarcasim, dirty jokes, justin timberlake, tator tots, christian dior, dolce and gabbana, industrial music, skull and cross bones, tight pants, cowboy boots, hot boys, icecream, bigmacs, tshirt dresses, fishnets, burlesque, sleeping, law and order, music, puppies, kitties, rollercoasters, beer, vodka, pizza, drunken fotos, glitter, cleavage enhancing bras, microorganisms that have flagella, fun words like ointment and cryptoorchidism and oophosalipingoectomy, fluffy pillows, baking cakes and cookies, easy mac, string cheese, more beer, drunken text messaging, shakin a tail feather, shoes, bags, big ole sunglasses aka hater blockers, perfume, belts, pumping iron,driving through states that i have never been to, candy, cookies,wasting quarters on stupid machienes in gas stations that you have no chance of winning, doughnuts, ice cream, breaking canadian laws, piggyback rides, titty bars, waterfalls, thai elvis, canadaian mountains california has hills, hope, dairy queen, celery, potato chips, cool ranch doritos, reeces peanut butter cups, aquanet, beer for breakfast thats all till i think of more.........................................hard at work at the bullseye boutique........... ......

I'd like to meet:

douche bags!! i love them!! especially ones that think because i run around in my underpants its an invitation to touch me.... i also enjoy the ones who yell my name at the bar to get my attention because they want a free drink.. shut the fuck up . i know youre there.. believe it or not there were people there before you and you have to wait your turn, just because you know my name.. you dont come first. oh and dont forget to slam your hand on the bar repeatedly .. that will also make me really happy. ...i also would like to meet people who flake out at the last minute when making plans with me.. i am really busy so it helps that you ditch out at the last second.. and dont forget to not call when you say you will ... i dont want to think we really are friends or anything...and lets not forget delusional shit talkers.. you know the ones who insist you are doing things you never did ... or even better things THEY do ... i need 5 of those...oh i also like when people take advantage of me.. im not nice to many people .. so make sure you get into the circle of trust .. then bleed me for everything you can get out of me! cos ill give it to you... i didnt want it anyway
nataliedee.com

Music:

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Movies:

.. i like happy endings..dirty dancing, pretty woman, waynes world, space balls, princess bride, bill and teds excellent adventure (bogus sucks!!), anchorman, dodgeball, house of a 1000 corpses, devils rejects, rockstar, this is spinal tap, detroit rock city, v for vendetta, joe dirt, the cell, silence of the lambs, red dragon, pulp fiction, four rooms, drop dead fred
nataliedee.com, beetlejuice, peewees big adventure, ruben and ed :), jackass, american psycho,cry baby, don't tell mom the babysitter is dead, way of the gun, borat, neverending story, dark crystal,detroit rock city, pans labrynth, harry and the hendersons, kids in the hall brain candy... some other ones too... ill add more later.. ......

Television:

.. I watch WAY to much Law and Order.. all of them except the gay trial by jury one.. blow out is back on. that is just a train wreck you have to stop and stare at ... jonathan anton ... sheesh.. the real housewives of orange county is a great show to watch you make you realize what you will never have in life... the best week ever on vh1 is great everyone should watch it ... and if you dont you are a bigger loser than me ... which is quite a feat!!....now that all my shows are off I really don't watch much I do enjoy any "reality" show that flaunts the many talents of the human race.. like american idol and so you think you can dance? you KNOW those people really can't think they have talent... AND to go on national televsion to show what a BIG FUCKING LOSER YOU ARE!!! GREAT!!!! I love laughing at and making fun of people to make myself feel better... and you do too ... just admit it.. fag!!......HOLY TOLEDO.. I noticed half the shit listed here is no longer on the TV!! so heres the update: WEEDS god I love this show!! FLIGHT OF THE CONCHORDS its worth paying for HBO to watch it .. HILL AIIRRR EEUUSSSS!!! I am still a hopeless Bravo jumkie I now DVR everything so I dont have to sit through the commercials! Yep, Im a loser! Still Have the HUGE obsession with VH1... rock of love anyone??? OH and then there is the gem of The Pick Up Artist.. WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU KIDDING THIS GUY WHO WEARS GOGGLES AND HEADPHONES IS TEACHING GUYS HOW TO PICK UP CHICKS??!!!lets not even talk about the fact that A) he calls himself mystery... fag and B) he actually hangs out with people he calls his wingmen .. one of which is named J dog... and these guys get chicks??!! god I would love for him to come into my bar and try to pick up the chicks I know... well and to laugh at his goggles...man what losers... AND HE HAS A BOOK ITS NOT THAT HARD TO PICK UP CHICKS!!!!!!! what is this world coming to...

Books:

.. So I am back to this reading thing..... I am reading i hope they serve beer in hell by tucker max (thanks joli) and blood sucking feinds by christopher moore ....recently survivor by chuck palahniuk, duma key by stephen king, the book of lost things by john connolly, candy girl by diablo cody,coyote blue by christopher moore, dexter in the dark by jeff lindsay the rules of attraction by bret easton ellis, breakfast of champions by kurt vonnegut, you suck by christopher moore, stranger than fiction by chuck palahniuk, the invention of hugo cabret by brian selznick, simple plan by scott smith, black coffee blues by henry rollins choke by chuck palahniuk,the zen of zombie by scott kenemore, slash's autobiography,dirty job by christopher moore, how to make love like a porn star by jenna jameson, reefer madness by eric schlosser, dearly devoted dexter by jeff lindsay, read darkly dreaming dexter by jeff lindsay, skinny bitch by rory freedman and kim barnouin, lost by gregory maguire, invisible monster by chuck palahniuk, beautiful stranger by hope donahue, sellevision by augusten burroughs, state of fear by michael crichton, fight club by chuck palahniuk, thriller its a collection of short stories buy mulitple authors. the last harry potter j k rowling, Blaze by richard bachman, dry by augusten burroughs,deadly errors by allen wyler, memory by bennett davlin, all 6 harry potter books by j k rowling, diary by chuck palahniuk, derailed by james siegel, the stepford wives by ian levin, yeah i said it by wanda sykes, jarhead by anthony swofford, house by frank peretti and ted dekker, zodiac by robert greysmith shes not there by jennifer finney boyland,spook by mary roach, the darwin consipiracy by john darnton, Son of a Witch by gregory maguire .... magical thinking by augusten burroughs, the broker by john grisham, in cold blood by truman capote, nightlistner by armistead maupin, fear and loathing in las vegas by hunter s thompson ,sharp objects by gilian flynn, hannibal rising by thomas harris,possible side effects by agusten burroughs, mirror mirror by gregory maguire

Heroes:

.. your mom ... she did birth and deal with your worthless ass for how ever many years you have existed..Ohgr for being 3/4 robot and on of the most AMAZING front men I have EVER seen!!!! Joe Reddner and his Titty Empire WOW now that is impressive!!!Traci Lords porno queen at 16!!! oh and me im my own hero... i never let me down and i always do things that impress me

My Blog

the adventure of the month.. chi town

So as we all know laura and christie like to obsessively see bands... all over...so we see all the florida ministry shows hung out with the guys in hemlock and burton   im still not really sure ...
Posted by Laura Von Awesome on Tue, 13 May 2008 08:12:00 PST

heres the rest...

sooo as most of you know.. i am now the proud owner of a car that belongs in the 40 year old virgin   but how did this all come about you ask     well let me tell ya     so yo...
Posted by Laura Von Awesome on Wed, 02 Apr 2008 08:52:00 PST

oh wait! it got worse!

So today teresa and i went on a new adventure.. probation!  let me just tell you how amazing it wasnt.... first off its at the salvation army building on florida avenue.. yeah.. so every homeless...
Posted by Laura Von Awesome on Tue, 26 Feb 2008 01:00:00 PST

court..EEEK!!!

ALRIGHT the day has arrived... so after drinking boneryard out of house and home last night and seeing the amazing david lee roth high kick off between ween and nate I was awakened with probably ...
Posted by Laura Von Awesome on Tue, 26 Feb 2008 07:25:00 PST

AA... and dim sum

OK OK OK! I GET IT!! we all want to know what's going on!! SO, here it is!!     Well, I went to Suncoast saftey counsil for my DUI school.. as part of it they do an evaluation on you to see ...
Posted by Laura Von Awesome on Tue, 12 Feb 2008 01:43:00 PST

how to tip!

It appears as though there is still some confusion surrounding tipping your bartender. Some people I think are just plain confused. I think they might be under the impression that bartenders earn an a...
Posted by Laura Von Awesome on Wed, 24 Oct 2007 10:07:00 PST

update on recent events

ok so here is what is going on so far...   nothing! i got a hearing with the dmv on october 26th and a hearing with the court to enter a plea on october 30th   we are trying to cancel the he...
Posted by Laura Von Awesome on Mon, 17 Sep 2007 07:51:00 PST

wanna know how my weeks been??

So as we all know I worked all labor day weekend while you all came out and had fun, not that I didnt have fun.. but it's always nice to have someone else make your drinks. So, I go out monday night h...
Posted by Laura Von Awesome on Fri, 07 Sep 2007 11:05:00 PST

dog shit AKA my life... kinda

I am just wondering if I am really alone...     I don't understand why  I try SOOO hard  to be a good person by all accounts, and karma still SHITS on me... and I'm not talking lit...
Posted by Laura Von Awesome on Sun, 27 May 2007 02:12:00 PST

Why I love VH1

Ok Ok I know VH1.... well here it goes..   Last week I FINALLY became technally advanced, switched cable companies, and now have bright house... which means DVR!!! How do people live with out the...
Posted by Laura Von Awesome on Thu, 19 Apr 2007 05:53:00 PST