Kat profile picture

Kat

in the story of my life, you'll barely get a mention

About Me

i am perpetually confused.

“Unrequited love, at that period of my life, the only kind I seemed capable of feeling. This caused me much pain, but in retrospect I had to see the advantages. It provided all the emotional jolts of the other kind without any of the risks, it did not interfere with my life, which, although meager, was mine and predictable, and it involved no decisions. In the world of stark physical reality it might call for the removal of my ill-fitting garments (in the dark or the bathroom, if possible: no woman wants a man to see her safety pins), but it left undisturbed metaphysical counterparts. My Plutonic vision of myself resembled an Egyptian mummy, a mysteriously wrapped object that might or might not fall into dust if uncovered. But unrequited love demanded no stripteases.”

My Interests



kissing too hard, gumball machines, victorian postmortem photography, tori spelling, bare matresses, smoke signals, serial killers, fresh flowers, rain, dark corners, koo koo the bird girl, love letters, crime scene photos, trust funds

I'd like to meet:



"The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars..." -Jack Kerouac, "On the Road"
“Walk with me, hand in hand through the neon and styrofoam. Walk the razor blades and the broken hearts. Walk the fortune and the fortune hunted. Walk the chop suey bars and the tract of stars.I know I am a fool, hoping dirt and glory are both a kind of luminous paint; the humiliations and exaltations that light us up. I see like a bug, everything too large, the pressure of infinity hammering at my head. But how else to live, vertical that I am, pressed down and pressing up simultaneously? I cannot assume you will understand me. It is just as likely that as I invent what I want to say, you will invent what you want to hear. Some story we must have. Stray words on crumpled paper. A weak signal into the outer space of each other.The probability of separate worlds meeting is very small. The lure of it is immense. We send starships. We fall in love.”

The Best of Margot

http://tw.youtube.com/watch?v=OWKcO35aeSM

Music:



joni mitchell, kimya dawson, polyphonic spree, i'm from barcelona, bangs, ben kweller, karen dalton, mickey avalon, stiffed, santogold, babes in toyland, bon iver, peaches, tegan and sara, asobi seksu, the booze, marilyn manson, heartless bastards, civet, britney and the holy trinity- nsync, 98, and bsb, hole, marc bolan, thao, uk subs, patty griffin, liz durrett, joe purdy, girl in a coma, m.i.a (both), devotchka, jaymay, loney dear, the kooks, cat power, joshua james, yeah yeah yeahs, kate nash, basia bulat, fiona apple, sean hayes, joan jett, jeff hanson, patti smith, office, sufjan, coconut records, ferraby lionheart, the shivers, maia hirasawa, hello stranger, regina spektor, the gossip, beirut, janis joplin, mirah, sibylle baier, wolfmother, feist, meiko, seabear, boy least likely to, the blow, the vibrators, emily jane white, dustin o'halloran, the ramones, benjy ferree, rachael cantu

Movies:



eagle vs shark, harold and maude, stealing beauty, funny games, virgin suicides, margot at the wedding, penelope, the weatherman, the dreamers, secretary, ghost world, closer, american beauty, foxfire, the orphanage, savage grace, punch drunk love, any and every wes anderson film, girl interrupted, lars and the real girl, the mist, juno, gia, the dead girl, empire records, la vie en rose, may, the devil and daniel johnston, perfume, elephant, the professional, dedication, hard candy, breakfast at tiff's, mozart and the whale, fur, dirty dancing, shortbus, eternal sunshine, grey gardens, la jetee sans soleil, pumpkin, se7en, tank girl, i heart huckabees, the hours, factory girl, you me and everyone we know, stardust, funny face, welcome to the dollhouse, 2 days in paris

Television:



I'm Chopping All of My Action...And Mostly Power
http://tw.youtube.com/watch?v=yin-UDmQfUY

Books:



lolita, extremely loud and incredibly close, spilling open, we need to talk about kevin, here kitty kitty, plath and sexton's collected poems, gatsby, echo, art and lies

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Heroes:



"i loved him the way it feels when you get hot wax on the inside of your wrist while its still burning just as sudden its a cool thick skin, like it tastes to eat sweet snow above the daffodil bulbs not that i've ever found it but clean snow that melts to nothing so that you aren't even sure it was ever there. i loved him like spaniel joy at a scent in the grass riveted, lost. i loved him so much it felt as if it had to be taken away from me at any moment, changed. How can something like that be allowed to exist on this earth?" -ice the rose and the beast

My Blog

sad boy

we satnakedon yourbedroomfloor,listening tovelvet underground on vinylsweet sweet jane,you sang--sweet sweet girlyou kissed my foreheadand yes,i fell for youjust for a moment.justonemoment...
Posted by Kat on Mon, 13 Oct 2008 05:49:00 PST

stay

blood in the sinki'm trying to make sensein the dishesall this bloodwhose is it?i wonderwho wiil be okay okay with it?no oneno one.
Posted by Kat on Thu, 09 Oct 2008 03:02:00 PST

some awful feeling

i remember digging up the deadto check for breathi remember standing on the waysidefluttering like a wingi remember black lungslunging forth,bearing their teethi remembergrasping fortheir coolunflinch...
Posted by Kat on Wed, 08 Oct 2008 10:52:00 PST

with his smile

he's got the hatlow over his browi wait for the lookthe look that says'you are, you are"but she standsin the backravens about her hairkeeping his eyeand i wonder,will this,could this,ever be it?or am ...
Posted by Kat on Wed, 01 Oct 2008 10:48:00 PST

greener pastures

so,its been five years.what if you stopped remembering me?remember, you were my first,my firstloveone syllablenestled in betweenthe starsyou kissed me underan unsteady lightmy love,your accent stuck o...
Posted by Kat on Fri, 19 Sep 2008 11:26:00 PST

the whole

we wewewere oneand you sangoncewith such sincerityi held my hands outfor youoh girlyou onceyou twicei fucked you three timesthe united kingdomseemedlikea destinationmy handsheld outfour leaf cloversyo...
Posted by Kat on Mon, 15 Sep 2008 02:44:00 PST

prom dress

remember when i was on the floortaffeta and silki was the one in the bow tieyou satand studied mei was in my prom dresswaiting for youto loveme
Posted by Kat on Mon, 15 Sep 2008 02:02:00 PST

the beautiful girl

beautifulhe sayshe saysbut what does that evenmean?i am a ghost withno heavento call home
Posted by Kat on Mon, 15 Sep 2008 01:22:00 PST

the wishes

there are many things i wish for in this world:love: the flood to make the flowers bloomhope: to keep the flowers alivefriendship: to sustain their roots throughout the weary blue winterfulfillment: t...
Posted by Kat on Tue, 09 Sep 2008 08:42:00 PST

dont try anything, not even love. not ever.

i grow tired. tired of not being enough. do you ever know, you'll just never be enough? and jealousy. i get so tired of jealousy. what about grace? where is grace amidst all this jealousy? where do i...
Posted by Kat on Fri, 05 Sep 2008 02:30:00 PST