martin - ProfilesArchive

About Me

What can i say about myself?
I often see the funny side of things, even if to all appearances there isn't one. Funerals, for example - never, ever take me to a funeral...
My parents raised me on a strict 'grow a centimetre, eat a carrot' regime, the end result is i'm now 25 foot tall and have perfect night vision (not to mention orange skin and green hair)
When i was 18 i picked up a guitar, and thought 'i'll never be able to play this!' and now, several years later, people come up to me in the street and say 'you'll never be able to play that!'
People might think i tend to go a bit 'nuts' or 'weird' if we're hanging out and i've not seen them for a while - but the sad truth is that i'm like that all the time... which makes living with me difficult (even i find it difficult to live with myself).
I can count myself lucky because i have friends, some of whom you cant see, but they are real none-the-less... but the ones you can see are an amazing bunch as they have managed to put up with my obscure humour the longest - i'd tip my hat to them, but alas, i dont have a hat to tip...

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.. Copied from MySpace.com -- Find me on MySpace and be my friend!

My Interests

I likes to play my guitar, so i do. I am currently playing Perplexcity, trying to expand my mind by playing puzzles. I like to play on my PC and on my Xbox360. I'm having trouble containing myself as i wait for 'S.T.A.L.K.E.R' to come out (March - is it nearly March yet? ITS MARCH!!! WOO HOOO!!! ) then i will drop off the face of the planet for a while... I now have the game: GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD - Note to self: Next time, buy a game that actually runs on my PC... damn! damn! damn!

I'd like to meet:

God

Music:

Send More Paramedics, Rob Zombie, Everclear, Gary Numan, Zombie Apocalypse, Pitchshifter, Fu Manchu, Wolfmother, Nine Inch Nails, Choking Victim, Leftover Crack, Fear Factory, Sulphur, Morning Glory, Shai Hulud, NOFX, Kyuss, Queens Of The Stone Age, Clutch, Amen, Anti-Flag, 3 Stages Of Pain, Ministry, The Loose Shoes, The Union Underground, CKY, AFI, Rancid, Poison The Well, Type o Negative, Bad Religion, Marilyn Manson, Soulfly, Incubus, Slipknot, Korn,

Movies:

Dawn Of The Dead, "Haggard", Event Horizon, Evil Dead, Land Of The Dead, Stalker, Transformers, Mallrats, A Scanner Darkly, Bowling for Columbine, Shaun Of The Dead, Spiderman, Clerks (2), Bubba Ho-Tep, Day Of The Dead, the 51st State, Blade Runner, An Inconvenient Truth, Die Hard, I Robot, House of 1000 Corpses, District 13, Collateral, The Omega Man, Doom, Syriana, The Crow, I love B-Movies too, like Plan 9 From Outer Space, The Thing From Another World, The Day The Earth Stood Still, This Island Earth and When Worlds Collide.

Television:

My Name Is Earl, Family Guy, Red Dwarf, Monk, Hustle, Happy Tree Friends, Farscape, CSI, CSI: Miami, CSI: NY, Futurama, Time Team, Doctor Who, CKY, Jackass, Viva La Bam the original Transformers cartoon

Books:

Roadside Picnic by Boris and Arkady Strugatsky is an awesome, awesome book along with The Foreigners by James Lovegrove and I Am Legend by Richard Matheson. I also enjoy reading the works of H.P Lovecraft, Robert Rankin, Philip K Dick, Peter F. Hamilton, David Moody, Michael Moore, Alastair Reynolds, David Eddings to name but a few. I also enjoy reading Robert Kirkmans Walking Dead comics and like the Marvel Zombies comics

Heroes:

Gordon Freeman, Bruce Campbell, Ross Noble, Fernando Martinez, Steven Hawking, Jay and Silent Bob, The Hoff, Venom

My Blog

In Loving Memory...

R.I.P George02 March 1993 - 21 August 2007Good boy
Posted by martin on Wed, 05 Sep 2007 06:32:00 PST

Fearsome Beard Investigation - The truth (?)

Hello there,As i was writing the next report in the Fearsome Beard Investigation i had an epiphany. The abbreviation is F.B.I.Never realised that before.Conspiracy Theorists are going to go nuts!Its L...
Posted by martin on Tue, 14 Aug 2007 02:55:00 PST

Fearsome Beard Investigation - Fourth Report

This is the fourth in a series of reports, chronicling the life and actions of the Fearsome Beard.A lot has happened since my last report, and nobody will need reminding of the horrific events at the ...
Posted by martin on Tue, 14 Aug 2007 04:53:00 PST

Typical

Yesterday, we were all having a meeting, and as certain things are coming to an end, one of the people there suggested a sort of 'Secret Santa' so that we aren't all buying each other stuff.This met w...
Posted by martin on Thu, 09 Aug 2007 07:41:00 PST

Confusing the Meaning to get the point across

Its funny how certain things trigger memories...Like for instance, i remembered this event from my youth last Sunday (15 July 2007), when i was out drinking. The story has nothing to do with drinking ...
Posted by martin on Tue, 17 Jul 2007 09:34:00 PST

Bureaucracy

With this brand spanking new job in a different department, i have to have access to some different files on the overall server - which is reasonable to expect.So, last week (Thursday 5 July 2007), my...
Posted by martin on Thu, 12 Jul 2007 09:18:00 PST

Rhyming for the sheer hell of it

Alright, this is a quick one, primarily because this thing has been going round my head all day, so i feel i must share it with you all (joy)-ahem-Once, upon the stairI met a man who wasn't thereHe wa...
Posted by martin on Fri, 06 Jul 2007 05:10:00 PST

Frustration

No beating around the bush... Straight in we go...I have just spent all morning trying to put some more memory into a laptop.'Not a difficult job' i hear you cry, and i agree - its as easy as me.Howev...
Posted by martin on Tue, 26 Jun 2007 05:07:00 PST

Fearsome Beard Investigation - Third Report

This is the third in a series of reports, chronicling the life and actions of the Fearsome Beard.I must admit that things have been quiet of late and that is good as it has meant my life has been gett...
Posted by martin on Thu, 21 Jun 2007 12:12:00 PST

Conflict of Self Interest

One time in science class, the teacher asked me'What is the chemical with the formula HCl?'I knew the answer.I really did.However, the words elduded me.I just couldn't think of what it was called.I sa...
Posted by martin on Mon, 18 Jun 2007 04:26:00 PST