Claude Balls - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Honk if you love Jesus!

Etsy
Buy Handmade
tikiroommerch

My Interests

Advanced Hermeneutics

I'd like to meet:

People of a like-minded nature who are similar in interests and like in creativity and imagination. Similar, but yet different in the areas to which we all pertain, you understand.

Music:

Herb Alpert
Pink Floyd
Sergio Mendes
Al Green
Chris Cornell
Tom Petty
Tom Jones
George Gershwin
Toni Fisher
Vangelis
Johnny Cash
The Bee Gees
Prince
Captain and Tennille
Astrud Gilberto
Dionne Warwick
1960s instrumental lounge music
Burt Bacharach
Electric Light Orchestra
John Lennon
Madonna
Quincy Jones
Fantasia soundtrack

Movies:

Dolemite
Persuasion
Raising Arizona
Dick Tracy
Blade Runner
Star Wars IV, V, and VI
Oh, God!
Ed Wood
The Muppet Movie
Goodfellas
Casino
Silence of the Lambs
Saturday Night Fever
Rocky
The Apartment
Postcards from the Edge
Problem Child
Caddyshack
The Hudsucker Proxy
Fargo
Barton Fink
Dirty Work
Scarface
The Untouchables
The Godfather Pts. I and II

Television:

Reno 911
Whose Line is it Anyway?
24
Benny Hill
The Office (the good version on BBC America)
Monty Python's Flying Circus
Twilight Zone
Leave it to Beaver
Sanford and Son
King of the Hill
Really old Simpsons
Mystery Science Theater 3000
The Golden Girls
Footballers' Wives
Are You Being Served?
Camp Lazlo
Bonanza
The Brady Bunch
The X-Files

Books:

Anything by Daniel Pinkwater
Anything about plants
Confessions of a Crap Artist by Philip K. Dick

Heroes:

John Glenn, Teddy Roosevelt, Jane Austen, Howard Stern

My Blog

Celebrity Face Recognizer

That thing is wacked. I got Bernard Pivot, Anna Paquin, Anne Frank, and Michael Jordan. Also Brigitte Bardot, which would have been nice if it hadn't been the 75-year-old version. Bu...
Posted by Claude Balls on Sat, 11 Oct 2008 07:37:00 PST

Dolemite has changed my life.

Warden: "Now, Dolemite, your whole existence will have to be kept secret. Only I, Queen Bee, and one man who nobody knows until the end of this can know." Queen Bee: "Oh Dolemite, I'...
Posted by Claude Balls on Sat, 11 Oct 2008 07:16:00 PST

Hot Dog Meat Feast?

Edited for more clarity! It's so wrong, and yet oh, so right, just like shooting barbeque sauce out of a Super Soaker at passing cars on a Friday night near the I-17 and Peoria by where the old strip ...
Posted by Claude Balls on Fri, 03 Oct 2008 09:32:00 PST

Gordon Jones Jr is all about havin’ fun, meetin’ girls, meetin’ guys...

And if you don't like it, you can go fuck yourself, cuz that's what Gordon Jones Jr is all about. And if you don't like it, you can go fuck yourself. Cuz I'm Gordon Jones Jr, damn it. And that's what ...
Posted by Claude Balls on Thu, 02 Oct 2008 07:49:00 PST

Who wants a beat down?

Gordon takes all comers.
Posted by Claude Balls on Thu, 02 Oct 2008 04:28:00 PST

Name change for a new century

I am now Gordon Jones...Junior!
Posted by Claude Balls on Wed, 01 Oct 2008 03:23:00 PST

Hey, I used to hate everything I now adore and worship! Yeah!

Eat Me
Posted by Claude Balls on Tue, 30 Sep 2008 02:53:00 PST

Scariness...

I'm going to be helping Mom this week set up an account with eHarmony.
Posted by Claude Balls on Mon, 29 Sep 2008 08:01:00 PST

Racket Girls: With production overseen by George Weiss!

I love the character of George Weiss in Ed Wood. I can really see how this version of George Weiss could oversee the production of Racket Girls, a girl wrestling exploitation movie that open...
Posted by Claude Balls on Sun, 28 Sep 2008 06:51:00 PST

Focus on the Dysfunctional Family

a journal series by The Honorable Reverend Brin Edwards, Glendale Snake Church You know, times are tough these days. Gas is up, inflation's up, home prices are down. The irresponsibility o...
Posted by Claude Balls on Sat, 27 Sep 2008 06:24:00 PST