They call me Justin. I am the type of guy that gets smashed around noon, pisses on myself by 2:30, then blames the hero firefighters for not rescuing me right before I fight a bear, to which I lose. No but seriously, I'm important, people know me. I have many leather-bound books, and my apartment reeks of rich mohaganny. I can play twister well, preferably naked, and kick ass at the giant trampoline. I am 25 years old and inches long. I treat myspace like a one night stand, never call, never check up, but when I need a night away...wink, wink. I have a family. I'm taken, unless I become a megahuge rockstar wearing white cotton panties, drunk, passed out in a pool of my own vomit, and in my hanging out with steven tyler jumpsuit. Nuff said.
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