The Jake profile picture

The Jake

If you gotta ask, you will never know

About Me

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What can i say that will make me sound like a fun and interesting person? - Wellllllll - i have twice defeated evil mad scientists bent on world destruction, i have flown to mars and saturn in a self made spacecraft, and i have helped over 300 little old ladies cross the street. Okay now seriously- im just your average all-american white boy - enjoys sports (niners, giants, sharks, warriors). i also play on a softball team out at twin creeks, listens to mainly anything rock from beatles to disturbed/slayer but i can handle most other kinds of music except county (who cares about thier exs, trucks, and dogs). I own 2 muscle cars - a 69 purple GTO and a 70 Nova SS. Currently attending DeAnza and West Valley to get my GE stuff and my AA out of the way so i can transfer to SJSU or UCSC - majoring in Psych. I fully enjoy watching movies and can be considered an expert of the cheezy one-liners (especially from the 80s). I am a self styled comic without work or talent so to pay the bills i work 2 jobs which kills my social life and my physical studliness. I am currently engaged to a wonderful girl that is truly special (and i dont mean short-bus special). Ok well that about sums up what i can think about at 3PM on myself - so any other thoughts, questions, whatever just write me an messegeI am 24% Emo.
.. Okay... so I'm not emo at all.. I am probably not even goth, because goths are just messed up emo kids... I am probably a metal head... or into boy bands... Take the
Emo Test
@ FualiDotComI am 14% White Trash.
.. I, my friend, have class. I am so not white trash. . I am more than likely Democrat, and my place is neat, and there is a good chance I may never drink wine from a box. Take the
White Trash Test
@ FualiDotCom
What FF7: Advent Children Character Are You?
Hosted by theOtaku.com: Anime . Done right.
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Jake Smith
Birthday: 8/8/79
Birthplace: Santa Clara
Current Location: San jose
Eye Color: blue
Hair Color: dirty blonde
Height: 6'0
Right Handed or Left Handed: right
Your Heritage: english,scottish,irish,swedish - yup im all whitey
The Shoes You Wore Today: my etnies
Your Weakness: cheesecake
Your Fears: none that i can think of - wait does losing my wiener count
Your Perfect Pizza: hawaiian with pepperoni and extra sauce
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: New job, move out, be engaged
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha - wait what was the question?
Thoughts First Waking Up: Where am I and whose under-roos am i wearing
Your Best Physical Feature: Ill leave that to your imagination
Your Bedtime: last year around xmas
Your Most Missed Memory: my cat merlyn
Pepsi or Coke: pepsi
MacDonalds or Burger King: burger king
Single or Group Dates: single
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
Cappuccino or Coffee: Coffee
Do you Smoke: No
Do you Swear: Fuck fuck fuckety fuck fuck fuck - does that count?
Do you Sing: Only if i want to cause animals severe pain
Do you Shower Daily: I try but sometimes its just too hard to get out of bed
Have you Been in Love: Yes and still am thank you
Do you want to go to College: In college
Do you want to get Married: Of course - its in the works
Do you belive in yourself: I hope so or else whats the point
Do you get Motion Sickness: No
Do you think you are Attractive: Isnt that up to everyone else? - But i think im damn hot
Are you a Health Freak: not really
Do you get along with your Parents: yes
Do you like Thunderstorms: bad ass - if only rain wasnt involoved
Do you play an Instrument: heehee - oh an actual one - uhh i used to play guitar
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Yes
In the past month have you Smoked: No
In the past month have you been on Drugs: No
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Yes
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Yes - all the time - if for no reason other than to make fun of people
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: a whole box cause i ate a few yesterday
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: No
In the past month have you been on Stage: No
In the past month have you been Dumped: No
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: No - but still trying to work that one out with the LoLo
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: does sugar packets from Dennys count?
Ever been Drunk: Yes i think - cant really remember
Ever been called a Tease: Can guys be teases?
Ever been Beaten up: No - im 3-0 baby
Ever Shoplifted: Yes - i was a klepto in my younger days
How do you want to Die: during sex - although that might creep out the other person
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: a toys-r-us kid - but seriously a Sports Psychologist
What country would you most like to Visit: Italy
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Blue
Favourite Hair Color: Brown
Short or Long Hair: It doenst matter to me but if i had to pick - long
Height: no preference
Weight: as long as they make you happy who cares
Best Clothing Style: skater/punk/goth/rocker/none :)
Number of Drugs I have taken: 1
Number of CDs I own: close to 300 or so
Number of Piercings: 1
Number of Tattoos: 1
Number of things in my Past I Regret: only 3
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
how jedi are you? :: by lawrie malen
Your Seduction Style: Fantasy Lover
You know that ideal love that each of us dreams of from childhood? That's you!
Not because you posess all of the ideal characteristics, but because you are a savvy shape shifter.
You have the uncanny ability to detect someone's particular fantasy... and make it you.
You inspire each person to be an idealist and passionate, and you make each moment memorable
Even a simple coffee date with you can be the most romantic moment of someone's life
By giving your date exactly what he or she desires, you quickly become the ideal lover.
Your abilities to make dreams come true is so strong, that you are often the love of many people's lives.
Your ex's (and even people you have simply met or been friends with) long to be yours.
No doubt you are the one others have dreamed of... your biggest challenge is finding *your* dream lover. What Kind of Seducer Are You?Your results:
You are Batman Batman 75% Robin 52% Superman 50% Supergirl 45% Hulk 45% Spider-Man 40% The Flash 40% Wonder Woman 35% Iron Man 35% Green Lantern 30% Catwoman 30% You are dark, love gadgets
and have vowed to help the innocent
not suffer the pain you have endured.
Click here to take the "Which Superhero am I?" quiz...

My Interests


Old Age. Congratulations. You get to live a long
fulfilling life. You'll die by falling
peacefully and blissfully asleep and just not
wake up. What a way to go.

How Will You Die?
brought to you by Quizilla

I'd like to meet:

Stan Lee, Dane Cook, George Carlin, Superman (only cause he is a puss and i want to kick his spandex wearing ass), George Bush Jr(who doesnt want to kick his pathetic ass), and the inventor of sliced bread!!!!!!!
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adopt your own virtual pet!
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adopt your own virtual pet!
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adopt your own virtual pet!

Music:

beatles, metallica, slayer, disturbed, godsmack, static-x, huey lewis (dont ask), blues brothers, eric clapton, van halen, rammstein, rob zombie, iron maiden, judas priest, ministry, and all those sweet big hair 80s bands (scorpions, motley crue, queensryche, poison, etc. )

Movies:

evil dead trilogy, all the comic book movies (no matter how bad or cheezy they were), star wars movies, LOTR, empire records, happy gilmore, office space, and who can forget the all time classic killer clowns from outer space.

Television:

South Park, Chapelle's Show, Family Guy, sweet xmen cartoons, ren & stimpy, MXC, blind date - sorry i dont watch much TV (too many damn comercials not enough porn)
Stewie

Which Family Guy Character Are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Books:

Hero of a Thousand Faces, anything by R.A Salvatore, Maxim, Davinci Code, My 2 sweet cook books, and my giant comic book collection thats just collecting dust in storage

Heroes:

Stan Lee, Elvis (cause we all know he is secretly alive in a rest home in texas still eating PB and banana sandwiches), my wife for going through and dealing with all those unfortunate and extremely stressful/painful events and still having time and patience for me (i love you LoLo), and my mom for fighting the good fight against cancer and beating its bitch ass into submission.

My Blog

Isnt it about time for a new blog - My life 2 years later.

First off let me say HOLY CRAP have things changed since i have last blogged. Im going to take this slow and hopefully i dont forget anything - and you readers better not fall asleep on me. I would ha...
Posted by The Jake on Thu, 13 Mar 2008 04:33:00 PST

Sick as hell

Ok good things 1st - last saturday i finally met laurel's dad's side of the family - they are a big group but very friendly. It was up in Danville and of course i fell asleep on the way there - heehee...
Posted by The Jake on Sat, 10 Dec 2005 06:07:00 PST

holidays are here!!!!!!!

So finally the holidays are here and i couldnt be happier. I love this time of year - the crisp air - the wood burning smells - the lights on the houses - families getting together. Now i have laurel ...
Posted by The Jake on Tue, 29 Nov 2005 09:12:00 PST

what a crazy week and a half

Are you ready for this cause i have a ton of shite to tell - 1. On Oct 15th Laurel and I finally moved out into our kick ass apartment - 2bd 2bath - 1000sq ft - all new shit - yeah it rocks. So ...
Posted by The Jake on Fri, 28 Oct 2005 07:37:00 PST

Engaged in Monterey

Yeah you heard me right - i am now officially officially engaged to the beautiful lovely Miss Laurel Alberts (soon to be Smith!!). Now i know all of you knew this was going to happen sooner or later j...
Posted by The Jake on Fri, 23 Sep 2005 08:39:00 PST

Already a great week and even more to come

So let me tell you about my week - Ive turned in some apps for new jobs this week (dispatcher in morgan hill - it pays bank, and i also turned in an app back with goodguys for some extra cash) We wen...
Posted by The Jake on Sun, 11 Sep 2005 10:15:00 PST

Beacuse I Can

just for shits and giggles im gonna post a blog about nothing. Plus laurel needs something to read . Ok here it goes - blah blah blah yackety smackety - just kidding. So on thurs morning my dad and s...
Posted by The Jake on Mon, 05 Sep 2005 07:57:00 PST

woohoo - finally got it!!!

If the headline isnt enough lemme explain - we got approved for our apartment today - SUPER SWEET - anyways we are going to be moving in sometime around Oct 15th (whenever they finish remodeling) so i...
Posted by The Jake on Sat, 03 Sep 2005 10:46:00 PST

5 months

So it has been 5 months since laurel and I got together (really really) and it has been the best 5 months of my life. She has been so special to me and it will only get better. So for our anniversary ...
Posted by The Jake on Thu, 18 Aug 2005 10:27:00 PST

Damn im old - heehee

Well another birthday has come and gone and im only getting older DOH. The big difference this year was i finally had someone special to me to spend it with - the always lovely and wonderful laurel. A...
Posted by The Jake on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST