Jeffrey profile picture

Jeffrey

I am here for Friends

About Me

I am a study in contradictions. I try to only eat natural foods, yet I smoke and drink like a maniac. I am against global capitalism, yet I drive a Mercedes. I love studying cosmology (that's not cosmetics, that's the origins of the universe) and theoretical physics, but I also love fart jokes. I would normally mock someone writing this self-aggrandizing nonsense, yet, here we are.
If you care any further, I spent most of my life trying to make it in the music business, and I got damn close to whatever that means, and I got to record some records, film a television series that never aired, meet some very interesting people, and have a blast. I became tired of it after a while, and really got into food and wine, and have since helped a buddy of mine open his big multi-million dollar restaurant, which is going quite well.
I also nabbed the girl I always wanted, and we've been together for a few years now, living in New York City. Not bad.
"Of the demonstrably wise there are but two: those who commit suicide, & those who keep their reasoning faculties atrophied with drink." - Mark Twain
Can you imagine working for a company that has a little more than 500 employees and has the following statistics:
- 29 have been accused of spousal abuse
- 7 have been arrested for fraud
- 19 have been accused of writing bad checks
- 117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses
- 3 have done time for assault
- 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
- 14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
- 8 have been arrested for shoplifting
- 21 are currently defendants in lawsuits
- 84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year
Can you guess which organization this is?
Give up yet?
It's the 535 members of the United States Congress. The same group that cranks out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line.
By the way, this is the greatest fucking thing ever:..
And this is equally awesome. ..

My Interests

We can do this two ways.
The "Don't-I-Sound-Really-Interesting" Way Quantum Physics, the Italian wines of Piemonte and Friuli-Venezia Giulia, OS X, Indie Films, Progressive Rock, Nouveau American Cuisine, Libertarian/Humanist Politics, Futurism, Atheism, and lots of other "-isms."
Or, The "Totally-Honest" Way Drinking, Playing Poker, Smoking Cigarettes, Going Out To Eat, Messing Around On The Computer, Getting Naked with my Lady, Reading Books, yanking my dog around by the leash, and StumbleUpon. To quote John Lennon: "I loathe physical activity; I'll still listen to music, and read books, and watch films, but the only thing I want to use my body for is to fuck."
Yeah, that's it.

I'd like to meet:

    People looking to give away vintage synthesizers.
    People who have read "Illuminatus!".
    People who know what "Zaireeka" is.
    People who agree that the film "Point Break" is the greatest cinematic achievement in the history of mankind, save, perhaps, "Die Hard."
    People who agree that wine and cheese on a crisp October afternoon is more special than babies, puppies, and Jesus Christ.
    People that realize that following religion, and not science, is the cause of ALL of the world's problems.

Music:

The Beatles, Wilco, Pink Floyd, Radiohead, Yes, The Flaming Lips, Ben Folds (Five), Phish, STP, Tom Petty (& The Heartbreakers) Alice In Chains, Aerosmith, Fiona Apple, Beastie Boys, Beck, Billy Talent, Cream, The Doors, Guns and Roses, The Jayhawks, Jimi Hendrix Experience, Billy Joel, Led Zeppelin, Lo Faber Band, Marilyn Manson, Aimee Mann, Metallica, Michael Jackson, Nine Inch Nails, Nirvana, Pantera, The Pixies, Public Enemy, Rage Against the Machine, The Doves, The Polyphonic Spree, Jane's Addiction, Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Sigur Ros, Soundgarden, Soulive, Sublime, Tripping Daisy, Stevie Wonder, Tool, Ween, Beatallica, Frank Zappa, The Who, Dream Theatre, Track One AB, Fuzzbubble, Tripside, Paul Wenzel, AC/DC, The Allman Bros, Bad Religion, Black Crowes, Blues Traveller, The Cars, Coldplay, Creedence, CSNY, The Darkness, Faith No More, Genesis, Huey Lewis and the f'n News, King Missle, OK Go, Queen, Tears For Fears, The Thorns, Tenacious D, Eminem, Muse, Vince Guaraldi, Nellie McKay, and last but not least, Thomas Dolby ("She Blinded Me With Science" is the greatest song of all time).
...By the way, I haven't heard an artist or album that I was really into in some time...any ideas?

Movies:

If I had to pick a Top Ten, in no order...

  • BrazilGoodfellasThe Empire Strikes BackThe Big LebowskiFight ClubGodfather (Part II)The AbyssRushmoreOne Flew Over the Cuckoo's NestDie Hard

  • ...By the way... I haven't seen a good movie in something like 2 years.

    Television:

    The Simpsons, Penn and Teller's Bullshit!, The Daily Show, Ali G, Science Channel, Anything about plastic surgery gone wrong or people who have their own twins inside of them, or anything about tumors weighing in excess of 100 lbs.

    Books:

    Anything by Robert Anton Wilson and Tom Robbins and Chuck Palahniuk. For sheer fun, I love Stephen King (older stuff). Philosophy-wise, I love Sartre and Nietzsche. Science: Thorne, Hawking, and Kaku. Michael Moore's books are a fun read. The Zagat Guide is awesome, because it's fucking insane. The Onion Collections are hysterical and brilliant. Oh- and remember "Choose Your Own Adventure" books? If I had to pick my top five books of all time (based on how many re-reads) they would be:

      (1) The Illuminatus! Trilogy, Robert Anton Wilson. (2) Still Life With Woodpecker, Tom Robbins. (3) The Stand, Stephen King. (4) Our Dumb Century, The Onion. (5) Fight Club, Chuck Palahniuk.

    Those are the ones that I can actually quote paragraphs from. It's actually quite annoying.

    Heroes:

    George Carlin (meeting and talking with him was one of the coolest days of my life) Paul McCartney (a master of songwriting and an all-around nice guy) Nietzche (way ahead of his time). Steve Jobs (who else can say "I'm going to release an Iphone and a Pixar movie on the same effing day?!).