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~Favorite Things~
I think my most favorite thing in the world is water, i dont care how i get in it as long as its clean! I even love it frozen! I love to drink it, play in it, or just watch its beauty and the tranquility it gives me. I love fish aquariums, I love the rain, and I appreciate how it keeps us clean and nurtures our bodies. I think water is one of the most amazing things we have on this earth, it covers most of our world, it flows thru each of us, its in our air, and we are brought into the world by it!
you know, if you take a fish out of water, they are still a fish but they cant act like a fish, and indeed they will finally die. if you take the wide open spaces of an eagle away from him and put him in cage so he cannot lerk and roam, he is still an eagle, but he becomes further and further away from who he really is. yet, if someones a hammer and they are acting like a screw driver its gonna be difficult raod for the hammer. it makes sense to me that who we are inside is who we are, and we never forget that deep inside, and once we finally realize that and begin the journey back to who we truly are then we find that which lies deep inside, and brake out of the box of the teaching that have been brought apon us.
I'd like to meet:
I want to meet all kinds of people, nice ones of course. i love alaska and the UK. most of all i love the state i am in. i appreciate people when they are funny, we all need to lighten up and laugh. i also appreciate our serious times. i love intellectual stimulation, gotta keep my brain cell motivated! i love people from all walks of life, so glad we are all different! so whoever you are, wherever your at feel free to message me or IM me no matter what stage in life your at, or what mood your in, no telling maybe we might be in the same emotional state of mind at the same time!
ÇhÆRÕKÈÈ ~Yigaquu osaniyu adanvto adadoligi nigohilvi nasquv utloyasdi nihi (May the Great Spirits Blessings Always Be With You)
ÇhÆRÕKÈÈ ~Donadagohvi (until we meet again)
~Sharing Some Things About My Life~ive been told many yrs now that i have a gift of encouragement for those in distress, a healing spirit within me for the lost and forgotten, down & depressed, for i too have felt this way all my life, even tho i have never had to be alone and have made friends easily all my life i have been separted from my siblings & family for most of my life until something happened about 2 yrs ago, miracuiosly all of them have been brought back to me, not really by anything i did at the time, altho it has been a deep longing hearts desire all my life to have my family.
i have been networking on myspace to find the haida indians. I learned i was haida a few yrs ago when i found my biological dad. as the last few yrs have proven, so shall the rest of the story be fulfilled the same way, when the timing is right it will all fall into place the way it is suppose to.
i am so excited to know i will be reunited with the haidas. altho it has not happened yet, i already feel it. since i came back to oregon a little less then 2 yrs ago, i feel a power within the walls of the environment, thru the mountains when i drive down the street, in the air i breath, i can see the landscape as it was when the indians raomed it, i can feel the indian spirit roaming the lands in which i live in, and i can almost feel them talking to me, in a spiritual kind of way, that gives me a strong sense of belonging to them already. i am so excited that in a future day i will be singing and dancing with them around a fire, bringing together what was separated long ago. it seems to be a time of joining back together what has been lost. if i had a dieing wish it would be to sing & dance, worship and praise with my tribe as i leave this earth. they can separate us physically, but our indian heritage cannot be broken!
Music:
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I'm Movin' On
Rascal Flatts
I've dealt with my ghosts and faced all my demons,
Finally content with a past I regret.
I’ve found you find strength in your moments of weakness,
For once I’m at peace with myself.
I’ve been burdened with blame, trapped in the past for too long.
I’m movin’ on
I’ve lived in this place and I know all the faces,
Each one is different but they’re always the same.
They mean no harm but it’s time that I face it,
They’ll never allow me to change.
But I never dreamed home would end up where I don’t belong
I’m movin’ on
I’m movin’ on
At last I can see life has been patiently waiting for me,
And I know there’s no guarentee’s, but I’m not alone.
There comes a time in everyone’s life,
When all you can see are the years passing by.
And I have made up my mind that those days are gone
I sold what I could and packed what I couldn’t,
Stopped to fill up on my way out of town.
I’ve loved like I should but lived like
I shouldn’t,
I had to lose everything to find out.
Maybe forgiveness will find me somewhere down this road
I’m movin’ on
I’m movin’ on
I’m movin’ on
Till it Shines
Bob Seger
Take away my inhibitions
Take away my solitude
Fire me up with your resistance
Put me in the mood
Storm the walls around this prison
Leave the inmates
Free the guards
Deal me up another future
From some brand new deck of cards
Take the chip off of my shoulder
Smooth out all the lines
Take me out among the rustling pines
Till it shines
Like an echo down a canyon
Never coming back as clear
Lately i just judge the distance
Not the words i hear
I've been too long on these islands
I've been far too long alone
I've been too long without summer
In this winter home
Still if we can make the effort
If we take the time
Maybe we can leave this much behind
Till it shines
See the rich man lost and lonely
Watch him as he dines
Sitting there just testing all the wines
Till it shines
Movies:
~Me & Movies~
I have a ton of movies. I am not much of a celebrity fan and dont know most of their names (but i love johnny depp o my my), so to keep this simple i like science-fiction action, true stories especially when it teaches us about our history. Im not much for black and white movies or westerns, altho i love TombStone, i think its the one with Curt Russel (if thats his name). I have started a collection called "The Bible Collection", they have done such a good job with these movies that even someone who doesnt believe in the Bible can enjoy these. I Taped the "Taken Series" and also the "4400 Series", these are the kinds of stories i really enjoy. Movies that challenge good against evil are probably my favorites
~From the Taken Series~
My mom told me once that when your afraid of something what you want more then anything else is to make it go away. You want your life back to the way it was before you found out there was something to be afraid of. You want to build a high wall where your old life is behind it. But, nothing ever stays the same, it's not your old life at all, it's your new life with a wall built around it. The choice is not about going back to the way things were, the choice is about hidding or going right to the heart of things that scare you. Sometimes the best way to move into the unfamilar is to take small steps. Small steps! To take ordinary things to deal with something that is in no way ordinary. Were always going somewhere new, all the time! Familar things just let us pretend that we arent moving into unfamilar territory. We take those small familar steps and we try to be honest not to live as if nothing has changed, but to still go on with your life, but there are times when is what you need is a peace of how things used to be!
My mom said life is like a roller coaster ride, there are ups and downs, there are big scares and slow builds, and places where it levels out. The only difference is with this roller coaster is that when it stops you get off in the same place different then where you get on.
If a dream is just a dream and something happens in your mind when your asleep then that's alright and it's yours that sticks with you till morning, and it fades away in the delight, and ; but when the dreams start to come when your awake, and they come with the light, then that is not alright, what we look for is the other people who have dreamed what we have dreamed who have seen what we have seen, when the dreams become real sometimes the only comfort we can find is knowing your not alone.
I guess I always knew there was something different about me, but when all of this began to happen, when I started to be able to do things it was kinda scarie, like a plane where you start falling and it feels kinda good, untill you begin to wonder if you'll ever begin to stop. When you've done something you cant take back, something you dont understand, you start to hold tightly to what you do understand, and you try to make sense out of everything you can't, cause if you believe that is all you have to do to make things right is to find a reason for what happned, when you find a reason and it is not your own how do you find any comfort in any sense in that. There'd come a time I always knew would come, I'd always had this feeling that one day I'd always have to do something very hard. I just hoped I could do it without someone being hurt.
My mother used to sing to me a lot, folk songs mostly, the things she liked when she was a little girl. There was this one song called "further along" that always made me feel better when I was sad, further along we will know more about it, further along we know more why, cheer up my brother within the sunshine, we'll understand it all by & by. When you get to wondering too much about things, a song like that will sure help a lot.
When I was a very little girl my mother would read nursery rhymes to me. I always hated humpty-dumpty, thats a very scarie poem, no one knows how to put it back together again, not even all the kings horses or all the kings men. No one wants to think that there's anything in the world that could fall apart that easily, but of course anything can. I guess that's what's so scarie about humpty-dumpty.
I thought that if I could make them believe I was gone, they would stop bothering me, and I could go back to who I used to be, but too much had happened to us by then for anything to go back to how it was.
There's a feeling you get sometimes in a bad dream, your running and something dark & big is chasing you, and you want to just stop & let the dark big thing catch up to you. Something bad is gonna happen, you cant change that but you can turn & see it coming. You can see the face of your bad dream.
People talk a lot as if the most important thing in life is to always see things for what they are, but everything we do, every plan we make is kinda a lie. We're closing our eyes and prending that the day wont ever come where we dont have to make any more plans. Hope is the biggest delusion there is, and it's the best, we have to keep going as if it all matters or else we wouldnt keep going at all.
~Taken~
Television:
~Me & TV~
I don't like TV, but i love movies. I only get cable for a short time and tape everything I like then cancel my subscription. I do love to watch world news to keep up on current events, movies with no commercials, and educational channels such as the History Channel.
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Books:
As the rain falls
Cascades of sorrow they fall like rain, all these years filled with tears a lifetime of pain
Hearts forged in steel there is no love without the touch it is the warmth that brings the healing
My God, are you there, please rescue us from our despair and send the rain, as it falls into our souls, falling like grace send the rain, the healing rain our soul's do desire
Do we walk alone, blind and so far from home, a mansion in glory I do recall the story, but are we willing to partake as we carry our own cross
Will you claim us again these lost sons and daughters of Eve, she let us go into the world with but one hope, someday you shall crush the serpent's head as he brusies your feet
Crimson glory flowed from your annointed one as it flowed across the land it came to rest up the souls of man to bring us back onto the fold ages pass but the promise was made so long ago
Yes let the latter rain fall on us, let the healing rain touch our souls now that we crave eternity for there are we made complete as many nations,tribes, and people come as one to make obiedence unto the risen lamb, the great I am.
The lion will lay down with the lamb and there will be no more sorrow for God will be there to wipe away the pain left from the hungy years that soon come our way
~Thankx Eagle Warrior~
Heroes:
~My Heros~
I dont have any celeberty heros. my heros are special people who have crossed my path in life. my son is my hero becuz he has overcome so many challenges and i think thats what really makes a person a hero. saving others is almost an impossible task if they are not willing to help themselves, its hard to change even when one wants to change, but i believe when one begins the journey within, to learn who you are, what your strengths and weaknesses are, to build on the strengths and work the bugs out of our weaknesses. i think we can all be heros in the sense that none of us are perfect, we all have down-falls, and overcoming the hard things in life shows character, shows what were made of. there have been many times i have felt that i was failing my journey to later realize that under the circumstances i did quite well. i believe we can be our own worst enemy, and that we should give eachother a pat on the back more often, and also give ourselves a hug more often.
sorry Raul but you nor Sammy are heros of anyone here on myspace. get a life you guys, what the shit is wrong with you...
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