As far as deconstructing femininity can go, I fall rather loosely into the "otherwise brilliant" category. I have been known at times as 'The New Unpleasantness'. Cats are delightful. I like your breath on the back of my neck. Yours too. Hopefully I'll live to be a smart old witch who rules with an iron sceptre. It always works out in the end. And it does.. ok, not all the time. Most the time. Sometimes. Alright so what if it never does ok??? Shit!! I descend from a line of Welsh eccentrists and English vaudevillains. I love walking around in a Freudian slip. One day you will look for me and I'll be gone. I'd like to thank The Cygnets. To Annie, my first stalker, come back I miss you. To Nancy, thanks for your Aboriginal spirit-vision. So rare in a Welsh person. The only thing worse than women faking orgasm is men faking foreplay. I spent most of my formative years in the darkness of my hometown's finest art-deco cinema, The Regent Theatre. Somehow it just seemed better to be an object of your desire than one in your possession. Though staring into the void, and the prism of my self-imposed disappearance, I could see I felt you so much and I prayed my soul could take losing you. So much for grandeur. I like to wander around old forgotten fairgrounds. Only at night. I always get the fuzzy end of the lollipop. The squeezed out tube of toothpaste. The Baldwin Brothers are serious. Round and round and round I go. In that spin, lovin' that spin that I'm in. Lovin' that ol' black magic called trouble and desire. When I turned eleven I wore an anklet to school. One boy announced, "I THOUGHT ONLY PRETTY GIRLS WORE ANKLETS!!" My interest in gender politics thus began. I wish I'd met Stravinsky. I can creep into cupboards. My great-grandfather was a crazed one-armed vaudeville comic singer and hoofer. Now he dances behind my eyelids most nights when I close them to sleep. I like to spew words of glitter and grandeur, virulence and voodoo. Voodoo somehow tastes good. I also know that for some moments in life there are no words.