Darian profile picture

Darian

I mock, therefore I am...

About Me


Audio provided courtesy of All Access Music Group
Joe Penny | Hank Hill | The Wizard | The Dice Man
-- NEW AUDIO CLICK HERE --
I started out in the radio biz at a very early age.
After hearing so called "shock radio" for the first time, I realized that I HAD to be on the air ... oroffer my services as a fire alarm.
My third grade teacher, Mrs. Kenworth, said it best, "Darian works and plays well with others, mostlytheir heads."
By the time I was in my 20's, I was already a popular star of a radio call-in program inPennsylvania called "Who's Sitting in My Lap." Howard later stole this idea for his show, only he usesnaked whores. BTW, Howard sucks! Deal with it.
I'll be over-throwing a station near you, so turn down your radio, cuz I'M LOUD, and tell your children it's time for bed, even if it's 9 o'clock in the morning. And don't for a second think MUTE will shut me up! I scoff at mute!!!What's my favorite topic? Me! Me! Me! The 'Caustic Canadian Swampwitch', 'Ovaries WithAttitude'...'Radio's Rebel Redhead'...shameless self-promoting 'ho ... take your pick!
I'm inappropriate, mouthy, sarcastic, ha-larious, hot, ridiculously intellegent and really loud.Obviously, I'm also exceedingly humble and modest.
DID I SAY LOUD?
If you don't like me, you're not paying attention. Kill yourself and be done with it!
Did I mention? www.darianotoole.com.... ENTER

My Interests

Everything entertainment, but mainly I'n interested in laughter and I find it in the most unexpected places.

I'd like to meet:

Sarcastic, funny, intelligent, (no, seriously...I despise the Stooooopid) men, women and children willing to be enslaved to do my bidding and anyone and everyone in this crazy business with me. I love me those radio freaks!

Music:

Insert shameless plug for Hazerfan here. I love the best (of course) of all genres except rap.

Movies:

All time fave 5.1- This Is Spinal Tap 2- Princess Bride 3- Godfather 4- Changelings 5- Nutcracker, An American Nightmare (They pay me to say that. Now available for rental at your local Blockbuster.)

Television:

High Maintainence 90210. I swear to God. I'm the one groupie of that butler who polishes David statues and shampoos pink poodles. Shoot me now.

Books:

I'd like to tell you I have an impressive leather bound collection of the classics. Who we kiddin'? The pile you wade through to reach my toilet is what I'm perusing du jour.

Heroes:

My Dad. Everyone says that but in my cse it's warranted. You'd worship him too if ya knew him.

My Blog

Puerto Rican CSI

Why are we so worked up about Ms. Puerto Rico?  So she won Ms. Puerto Rico with a sympathy vote.  Now they're saying she planted the pepper spray, or itching powder, or Nair, herself to get ...
Posted by Darian on Mon, 03 Dec 2007 12:39:00 PST

You know what? Fairs fair but...

Seriously. I am all about free speech and if you are so inclined to call me names, I won't edit you. However, please respect that there are CHILDREN here! I coach them. They don't need to read this s...
Posted by Darian on Fri, 30 Nov 2007 12:52:00 PST

Anthropology at its ... um...best/ worst/ ugliest

I'll give you silly boys this much, Your audience is entertaining if nothing else. As I've noticed today, the core O&A audience is pretty much just stoopid (don't correct it, trust me, they won't ...
Posted by Darian on Wed, 28 Nov 2007 06:10:00 PST

Open letter to OPIE

WTF?! In case you missed it, here's the Darian log (just like Star Trek but cuter) 7:30 AM (Pacific)- Sound asleep. 7:50 AM - Abruptlty awakened by one O&A producer/bitch, Erock 8:00 AM - Aga...
Posted by Darian on Mon, 26 Nov 2007 03:29:00 PST

English is my first language...

Bullshit is my second,  French is a distant third and Spanish just kinda happens when you're living so close to the rafts. I can't help myself. I am SOOOOOO grateful (appropriate for this weeken...
Posted by Darian on Sun, 25 Nov 2007 11:39:00 PST

Darian Podcasts

OK, so my dearest friend in 'the biz' just sent me a scathing message about how comp-u-tarded I am. I got paid to be a part (or the biggest part ) of the problem, not the solution. Many people have i...
Posted by Darian on Wed, 21 Nov 2007 01:10:00 PST

News as it breaks

From www.allaccess.com Anderson Now 'Representin'' O'Toole ..>..> ..> .. The Darian Monster..>..>..>Former FREE-FM/SAN FRANCISCO on-air host DARIAN O'TOOLE is now being represented by PAUL B. A...
Posted by Darian on Wed, 21 Nov 2007 04:10:00 PST

To the HATERS!

It's fascinating when I google myself. Narcissistic though I am, oddly enough, I've only done it twice but Jesus H. Crikey, some of you are even crazier than me, and I own 59 shades of nutty. Just so...
Posted by Darian on Sat, 17 Nov 2007 01:58:00 PST

OH, Mr. Simpson, how you amuse me!

Am I crazy (shut up, rhetorical question) or should a pistol packing serial killer avoid anything even a little bit illegal, like I dunno, storming into a hotel room and making a couple of Chinese col...
Posted by Darian on Sat, 17 Nov 2007 12:12:00 PST

Twisted Labyrinth of Lunacy That is The Darian Brain

I've always likened my seriously disturbed mind to a bad part of Harlem, don't go in alone, and for the love of all that's holy...DON'T GET LOST!   One of my brothers (both genius scientists...
Posted by Darian on Sat, 10 Nov 2007 03:42:00 PST