CRUST

HELLO. THIS IS MY HEADLINE. ONE DAY I'LL PUT IN SOME THOUGHT AND DO A WORTHWHILE ONE.

ACCOUNT PHOTO ABOVE.this is my SECONDARY headline. i have no idea why it's here.

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DEVILFISH - the world's largest slinky, smallest man and most unusual undergarment. i have absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with this site, but like listing it first in my biography section. YOU figure out the psychiatric implications...
RANDOM AND ODD - i actually don't like this site at all, but what a cool name
CELEBRITIES EATING - curator, senior analyst, CEO, CFO, greeter, and i get pretzels when the snack machine goes empty.
TUPPERWARE MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS - think you need to spend thousands of dollars buying that new moog synthesizer, or vintage volt sequencer? WELL, THINK AGAIN

Predilections & Aversions

GOOD: music, making out, black, the color purple, the movie "the color purple", ambiguity, sit-ups, massaging my temples, napping, trolling for dames, serendipity, reading, riting, vanilla, words, good conversation, film, those funny doggies with all that excess skin...
BAD: everything else

hearing, seeing, digesting

eugene ionesco, franklin roosevelt, BLTs on wheat, jacques tahti, moorea french polynesia, Bewitched pre- the Darren change, david mamet, the soft curve of a woman's ankle, luis bunel, early neil simon, late o henry, raisinettes, pondering life, sj perelman, patricia highsmith...
the shins, the moffs, tragically hip, eek wanatasia, the rolling stones, gimme gimme gimme, cheap trick, iggy, look it's ruth, the beatles, pop staples, harry nillson, pj harvey, donovan, cat stevens, ac dc, the bar-kays, lou reed and the velvets, u2, the eels, dylan, blur, the la's, spoon, paul butterfield, blind faith, phil ochs, marc bolan and t rex, the vines, audioslave, laura nyro, the ramones, antje duvenkot, breeders, jay dilla...
citizen kane, the discreet charm of the bourgeoisie, days of heaven, deep throat, Unhand Me Harold!, momento, harold and maude, the conversation, chinatown, doing millie, about schmidt, one flew over the cuckoo's nest, some like it hot, some like it mornings (when you're only half-awake), bringing up baby, butch cassidy and the sundance kid, alan funt's what do you say to a naked lady? (a high watermark in american cinema), mon oncle, the hours, american movie, the apartment (anything by billy wilder), the bank dick, badlands...
xfiles, curb your enthusiasm, 6 feet under, 24, hawaii 5-0, playhouse 90, 30-something, car 54 where are you?, 77 sunset strip...

quotes

an object can be decreased in size simply by making it smaller - anonymous
i like a martini,
two at most.
three i'm under the table,
four i'm under the host. - dorothy parker
given enough time, anything at all can happen - arthur koestler
i couldn't attend the funeral, but i sent a nice note saying i approved of it - mark twain
respect the children of the poor - from them come the poets - anonymous
politics is show business for ugly people - thomas jefferson
hope: yeah, you let it go flat, and then you give it to them instead of formula. settles the stomach. and they don't dehydrate. that's the big thing, you can't let them dehydrate. unless you're really mad at 'em
i've never seen a situation so dismal that a policeman couldn't make it worse - brendan behan
it is a curious fact that you can give an american man some kind of a ball and he will be thoroughly content
the parent who could see his boy as he really is, would shake his head and say: "Willie is no good, I'll sell him."
lt. moss: i couldn't help but notice that all your schoolmates seem to be Japanese. why are they all Japanese, son? gideon: they're not Japanese. they're just very tired.
the three of them come stumbling out of the building, laughing about something. but as soon as they hit the pavement, we feel a chill. because there's something painfully familar about this street... And we see it behind them... A yellow coffee shop sign, blinking its message. Miriam's. Miriam's. Miriam's.
it's a small apartment, i've barely enough room to lay my hat and a few friends
los angeles is even worse than I suspected... if i described it literally I'd be set down as the damndest liar ever heard of. architecturally it is inconceivable, and the people all seem to be imbeciles - hl mencken
LA is the loneliest and most brutal of american cities. new york gets god-awful cold in the winter but there's a feeling of wacky comradeship somewhere in the street. LA is a jungle. - jack kerouac, on the road
it's some sort of updated Dantean inferno -- highways, overpasses, underpasses, cars, cars, cars, sunshine, smog, the Dodgers and the Rams and the Lakers, drugs and just unbelievable isolation... - thomas gifford, the wind chill factor
sophia: but, dorothy - you never spend the principal. i'm saving that money for when I get old. dorothy: GET old? ma - you don't leave fingerprints! - tv's the golden girls
that's one of the tragedies of this life -- that the men who are most in need of a beating-up are always enormous
a man works all his life in a glass factory, one day he feels like picking up a hammer - harold lloyd in the sin of harold diddlebock, 1947
rick sloan is tall, rich, good-looking, stupid, dishonest, conceited, a bully, liar, drunk, a thief, an egomaniac, and probably psychotic -- in short, highly attractive to women.
and she says, 'You and who else?' and I says 'Oh, yeah?' and she says, 'Yeah is right.' so I says 'You and me both.' she says 'That goes double for me.' i says 'Oh yeah?'
in italy for 30 years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder and bloodshed, but they produced michelangelo, leonardo da vinci and the renaissance. in switzerland they had brotherly love -- they had 500 years of democracy and peace, and what did that produce? the cuckoo clock
i don't go to church. kneeling bags my nylons
it took more than one man to change my name to Shanghai Lily
john, every day you act worse but today you're acting like tomorrow
a book is a mirror; if an ass peers into it, you can't expect an apostle to peer out
there are times when i think that the reading i have done in the past has had no effect except to cloud my mind and make me indecisive
i couldn't write the things they publish now, with no beginning, and no end, and a little incest in the middle
word has somehow got around that the split infinitive is always wrong. that is a piece with the outworn notion that it is always wrong to strike a lady
In America, only the successful writer is important, in France all writers are important, in England no writer is important, in Australia you have to explain what a writer is
nature, not content with denying him the ability to think, has endowed him the ability to write
writers seldom choose as friends those self-contained characters who are never in trouble, never unhappy or ill, never make mistakes, and always count their change when it is handed to them
listen carefully to first criticisms of your work. note just what it is about your work the critics don't like -- then cultivate it. that's the part of your work that's individual and worth keeping
why do they call them tellers? they never tell you anything. and why do they call it interest? it's boring. and another thing -- how come the Trust Department has all their pens chained to the table?
there is nothing you can do with a really dedicated misfit
i'd rather go out in a blaze of hydrocarbons than provide a cheap source of protein for the world's invertebrates.
martin levine has passed away at the age of 75. mr levine had owned a movie theatre chain here in new york. the funeral will be held on thursday at 2:15, 4:20. 6:30, 8:40 and 10:10
if ignorance is bliss, this is eden
you notice the long words harry uses? an ordinary man could take one of harry's words, break it into pieces, and have enough for a whole day's conversation
i don't like babies. they're needy, they're clingy and they leak
there was a hatchet-faced dame with him... I took off my hat and smiled at her, wondering why some dairy hadn't snapped her up to sour their cream for them
when I was a girl I only had two friends, and they were imaginary. and they would only play with each other
when I remember my family, i always remember their backs. they were always indignantly leaving places
my photographs do me an injustice. they look just like me
i'm afraid of losing my obscurity. genuineness only thrives in the dark
the beatles are not merely awful, I would consider it sacrilegious to say anything less than that they are godawful... They are so unbelieveably horrible, so appallingly unmusical, so dogmatically insensitive to the magic of the art, that they qualify as crowned heads of anti-music...
if our office was an inch smaller, it would have been adultery
he's going to go around the country stirring up apathy
you can't use tact with a congressman. a congressman is a hog. you must take a stick and hit him on the snout
bernard shaw has no enemies but is intensely disliked by his friends
i saw the play under the worst possible circumstances: the curtain was up
the pelican brief is turkey long
copulation was maragret's uncomplicated way of saying thank you...
hollywood starlet: any woman under 30 not actively employed in a brothel
if I owned texas and hell, i'd rent out texas and live in hell
the lady was extraordinarily naked

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