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Football , Clay Pigeon shooting , Go-karting , going out with the lads on the town...

I'd like to meet:

Everyone who i hav'nt seen for a few years .... and spider man :o)

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Get free graphics at BlingyBlob.com!

Music:

Life without music would be wrong, I have a lot of friends in the music business, Big Shout to DeQoY Records up and running... Have a look in my friends space to get on board or go to www.myspace.com/deqoyrecords. Also if you like your DJ's and mixing ect check out DJ GJ NUNN (www.gjnunn.com)and B-RAFFLES who are on my friends... I like all types of music as long as it doesn't repeat its self over and over. R&B, Hip-Hop u name it....

Movies:

Love Honour & Obey, Football Factory, The buiness, Snatch, Lockstock...blar blar blar blar

Television:

If im chillin out with the misses then ill watch wats on but apart from that NEXT ....unless the footie's on.

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Books:

FBI Job Vacancy...The FBI had an opening for an assassin. After all the background checks, Interviews and testing were done, there were 3 finalists: Two men and a Woman. For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large Metal door and handed him a gun."We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the Circumstances. Inside the room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Kill Her!!"The man said, "You can't be serious.I could never shoot my wife."The agent said, "Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home."The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his eyes... "I tried, but I can't kill my wife."The agent said, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls.After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman, wiping the sweat from her brow."This gun is loaded with blanks" she said. "I had to beat him to death with the chair."MORAL: Women are evil. Don't mess with them.!! An old cowboy dressed to kill with a cowboy shirt, hat, jeans, spurs, and chaps went to a bar and ordered a drink. As he sat sipping his whiskey, a young lady sat down next to him. After she ordered her drink, she turned to the cowboy and asked him, "Are you a real cowboy?" To which he replied, "Well, I have spent my whole life on the ranch, herding cows, breaking horses, mending fences. I guess I am." After a short while, he asked her what she was. She replied, "I am a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning I think of women, when I eat, shower, watch TV, everything seems to make me think of women." A short while later she left and the cowboy ordered another drink. A couple sat down next to him and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?" To which he replied, "I always thought I was, but I just found out that I'm a lesbian." A man walks into a bar and asks for a beer. After drinking it, he looks in his shirt pocket and asks for another beer. After drinking that one, he looks in his shirt pocket again and asks for another beer... This happens about another seven times before the bartender asks him, "Why do you keep looking in your pocket?" The man replies, "I have a picture of my wife in there. When she looks good enough, I'll go home.A midget went to the doctor: Doctor, I have this awful rash around my privates, it is really painful and red" Doctor "Stand on that chair and I'll have a look" Doctor takes scissors to said area and starts trimming around How does that feel now?" Midget "Brilliant, totally better, what have you done?" Doctor "I've cut the top off your wellies" THE AUSTRALIAN APPROACH ... A young Aussie lad moved to London and went to Harrods looking for a job. The manager asked "Do you have any sales experience?" The young man answered "Yeah, I was a salesman back home." The manager liked the Aussie so he gave him the job. His first day on the job was challenging and busy, but he got through it. After the store was locked up, the manager came down and asked "OK, so how many sales did you make today?" The Aussie said "One." The manager groaned and continued "Just one? Our sales people average 20 or 30 sales a day. How much was the sale for? " ....... Â£ 124,237.64. pounds" The manager choked and exclaimed Â£ 124,237.64 POUNDS What the hell did you sell him?" "Well, first I sold him a small fish hook, then a medium fish hook, and then I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down at the coast, so I told him he would need a boat, so we went down to the boat department and I sold him that twin-engined Power Cat. Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him down to car sales and I sold him the 4 x 4 Suzuki". The manager, incredulous, said "You mean to tell me....a guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat and 4x4?" "No no no......he came in here to buy a box of tampons for his lady friend and I said..... 'Well, since your weekend's buggered, you might as well go fishing."

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A very confident James Bond walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance then casually looks at his watch for a moment. The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?" No," he replies, "Q has just given me this state-of-the-art watch & I was just testing it."The intrigued woman says, "A state-of-the-art watch? What's so special about it?" Bond explains, "It uses alpha waves to talk to me telepathically."The lady says, "What's it telling you now?""Well, it says you're not wearing any knickers...."The woman giggles and replies, "Well it must be broken because I am wearing knickers!"Bond smirks, taps his watch and says, "Bloody thing's an hour fast." Golf Lesson"Well, what should I do?", asked the man."Hold the club gently," the pro replied, "just like you'd hold your wife's breast"Taking the advice, he took a swing, and POW! He hit the ball 250 yards straight up the fairway. The ecstatic man went back home telling his wife the good news about his lesson, and, the wife couldn't wait for her lesson.The next day, the wife went for her lesson. The pro watched her swing and said, "No, no, no, you're gripping the club way too hard.""What can I do?" asked the wife."Hold the club gently, just like you'd hold your husband's penis."The wife listened carefully to the pro's advice, took a swing, and, HUMP! -- the ball skipped down the fairway about 15 feet."You know, that was a lot better than I expected," the pro said. "Now, take the club out of your mouth, and, hold it in your hands."