prayin da pain will die.. if not @ LEAST FADE away profile picture

prayin da pain will die.. if not @ LEAST FADE away

THERE COMES A TIME IN YOUR LIFE WHEN YOU REALIZE WHO MATTERS, WHO NEVER DID, AND WHO ALWAYS WILL. SO

About Me

Profile Edited by MPS MySpace Editor 2.0I go by the name Nicole but to some I am known as Nikki Suarez. I took my 1st breath into this world on February 12, 1989.People tell me I am a real nice, sweet, caring, and loving person. I smile a lot, I'm funny, and I make friends easily. Im easygoing but not an EASY girl. I don't like being told what to do and yes I can be stubborn and sometimes have to learn the hard way. I am hard on myself a lot and sensitve sometimes...I love shopping, make-up, the color pink, chilling with my family and friends, talking on the phone, singing, sports, parties, movies, and normal teenage things girls like to do. I'll always be here for the people I love and care about. I hate fake jealous bitches, snobs, gossipers, and people who judge without knowing nothing...if u are one DONT BOTHER ME..just get a life and walk away

My Interests

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I'd like to meet:



It just hurts because I can't look at you the same exact way as I did. My feelings for you arent the same as it was and I have to admit that i honestly hate how I still love you after all the shit you put me through. I feel like someone took my heart and stomped on it. Not only was I hurt by my love but also my own family. Who else can I trust and get backstabbed by?Yes I know you changed and that you are sorry, but it doesnt change the fact the actions you did and NOW not just YOU but I gotta pay for the consequences to be with you and I really don't know how long will I be able to take lying and sneaking for you after what U have done to fuk up my family I don't blame everythin on you but I blame you for letting me fall in love wit chu after u know what you fuckin did in the past you shouldve known that we could no longer be together and that you shouldve never tried to court me from the start. Now we are both screwed. Yes I do still love you but its no longer the same and I don't know if it can change back to like before. I'm so numb and I still shake and space out and just keep everythin inside...I now know I have to carry a heavy burden in my heart for the rest of my life.. and something that I know my family can never forgive you for and what I know I truly cannot really fully forgive you for either. I have to carry it with me till I die..just like the saying FORGIVE..but NEVER 4GET. I wanna give up so bad seriosly.. but somehow I don't know why I hear a lil voice in my head saying to hold on to you just a lil bit longer!!!not just my parents but alot of ppl ask me what do I see in you and how can I take you back after something like this??They treat me like shit and tell me im selfish and careless person not thinking of my parents wants...I guess all I can say is love makes u do stupid things. There are so many times I regret and wonder "what if?".. I pray to God to help me do what HE wants me to do...U cant change destiny or fate. SO i guess well just see how this horror movie of my life will end...I don't know how anything could possibly get worse I guess for now I'l put up an act and pretend im ok because I don't wanna bring everyone else down along wit me..as much as it hurts to truly smile again like b4..I really don't understand why out of all the people this crap had to happen to me, but I will accept your punishment Lord...I still cry askin myself,"WHAT DID I EVER I DO TO DESERVE THIS?"

Books:

MY FAV BOOKE EVER!