October 2nd 2008
When I look into your eyes
My mind gets confused
I see lies
Mixed in with some truth
I see her
I see me
Overcome by the memories
My heart is infected
What is this disease
That you burden my soul with
If this is love
Then why's it called a gift
I can't remember my heart
Ever feeling like this
It's broken and torn
The love it once felt
Now rots to the core
I want so much to believe
But it's hard to ignore
You deny my true feelings
When expressed to the world
Well maybe not the world
But a particular girl
So who is she to you
Since it's obvious
You love her too
My heart believes
What it wants it to feel
But my mind is telling me
This shit aint for real
I'll fall back
You do what you do
Cause I'm not the only one
Who seems to be confused
You talk about a life together
How you wanna get married
But you can't even be with me
So you must be living a fantasy
Cause being with me
Is not just a possibility
But a 100% guarantee
At least that's my reality
I wear a smile
To shadow my cries
My heart is cold
Consumed by the pain it holds
Release me from the demons
Who are now in control
They linger on my every thought
From my waking moments
To my restless nights
Lord ease my soul
And take my sight
Cause love is blind
And I'm losing my mind
June 24th 2008
I wasn’t meant for this earth
From birth I’ve been cursed
If I wanted something else
I could have HIM
So take it for what it’s worth
I know what I want
But I’m doubted
You wanna call me out
Then step up to the plate
Cuz I’m bout it
Swallow your words
And take back your comment
Or regurgitate them
Like vomit
I’m on the top of my game
I’m thru with the pain
The blood, sweat and tears
That I’ve dealt with for years
I may not have EXPERIENCED
But trust and believe
I know ME
We’ve got 25 years of history
With you is where I wanna be
Not a fling
Or experiment
I wanna taste you like doublemint
I want you to be my first
And hopefully my last
Cuz HE...
Is a thing of the past
Like your books
You got me open
Lingering on each word
Praying, wishing and hoping
Look deep into my eyes
And really see what’s inside
It’s like an explosion
Can you feel it?
Good things come to those who wait
So I gotta have patience
Now I sit
In the guest room like a patient
In a doctor’s office
My heart aching
Now I’m, waiting
For you to get back to this state
Of mind…
Where you and I combine
Living our whatever after
Cuz happily ever afters
Only happen in fairy tales
Which are
Stories that haven’t ended
Yeah that’s right
I pay attention
To you
Your likes and dislikes
Love is a battle
So I’m standing my ground
I’m ready to fight
Putting it all out there
Wearing my heart on my sleeves
And if you’re familiar with me
Then you know that aint me
I’m in it to ride or die
So what’s it gonna be
You got me writing
My pen hasn’t touched paper in months
There’s NO WAY you can deny it
So if it’s time that you need
It’s all yours
You got me…
Praying to the Lord
To
Help you
Open your eyes
And not
Walk away from the prize
I got everything to offer
And
Everything to lose
So now…
It all depends on you!
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Myspace Comments6/9/07
In a field of broken dreams
My tortured soul lies
Quiet and alone
Wondering where you've been
For years I've waited
Out of the blue
I now exist to you
You're a stranger in my eyes
Are you here to stay
Walk away now if it's just a phase
Cuz my heart can't take no more pain
It's been played with and abused
By many men
Including you
How can you claim to love me
When you don't even know me
Miles away you smile and laugh
Having a great time
Do you even think of me
Probably at a bar drinking your life away
Sober up and realize what's in front of you
I cry so often
I've never felt so unwanted
No matter how many times I laugh
Or how many times I smile
My heart bleeds for you
For a man who cares nothing about me
And who has no time for me
I can't explain it
I love you
But I mean shit to you
Like a seed you planted
Watched it grow for a few days
Then said Fuck It
And walked away
You just let it sit there and die
I wish I could say I hate you
But you mean the world to me
tell me what I gotta do to make you feel the same
I can't explain it
How can I resemble such a man
My life is meaningless to you
You don't love me
If that's what you call love
You might as well hate me
Asking how old I am
Do you even know my birthday
Happy Mother's Day, Merry Christmas
Must be too difficult to pick up a phone
So much I've accomplished
And you've missed it all
I struggle to survive everyday of my life
Yet you're not there
Lending a helping hand
Play your fucking role for once in your life
I hate how much I love you
Can't stand how much I need you
But I just can't let you go
You know my heart is yours
And all you do is play with it
But it is what it is
You have me wrapped around your finger
I'll always be Daddy's Little Girl
And you know it
FUCK YOU!!!
Myspace Comments
First Name: Yomary
Middle Name: N/A
Birthday: March 18th, 1983
Eyes: Brown
Hair: Brown
Fav color: Purple
Day/Night: Night
Fave Food: Salads
FRIENDS AND LIFE
Do you ever wish you had another name? No
Do you like anyone? Yup
Which one of your friends acts the most like you? Celinesse
Who's the loudest? Celinesse
Who have you known the longest of your friends? Amy
Who's the shyest: Jackie
Are you close to any family members? Mom
When you cried the most: 2004
What's the best feeling in the world: Being in love
Worst Feeling: Having your heart broken
FINISH EACH SENTENCE:
Let's walk on the: beach
Let's run through: sand
Let's look at the: stars
What a nice: guy
Where did all the: love go
Why can't you: just be real
Silly, little: boy
Tell me: a secret
HAVE YOU:
Ran away from home: no
Pictured your crush naked: yup
Skipped school: yup
Broken someone's heart: bot that i know of
Been in love: yup
Cried when someone died: yup
Wanted someone you knew you couldn't have: possibly
Done something embarrassing: who hasen't
Done a drug: hmm
Cried in school: yup
RANDOM
Your Good Luck Charm: My son
Person You Hate Most: Mr.Palmer
Best Thing That Has Happened: My son
Ice Cream: cookie dough
WHO Makes you laugh the most: Brian
Makes you smile: Raj Jr, Brian, Celinesse
Has A Crush On You: some guy :)
Do You Have A Crush On Someone: but of course
HAVE YOU EVER
Fallen for your best friend?: maybe
Made out with JUST a friend?: yup
Kissed two people in the same day?: no
Had sex with two different people in the same day?: nope
Been rejected: . yup
Been in love?: yup
Been used?: unfortunately
Done something you regret?: never
Cheated on someone?: in the past
Been called a tease: yup
WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON...
You touched?: Raj Jr
You talked to on the phone?: Brian
You hugged?: Raj Jr
You instant messaged?: no clue
You kissed?: Raj Jr
You yelled at?: Raj Jr
Who text messaged you?: Brian
Who broke your heart?: Mr. Palmer
Who told you they loved you?: Cellinesse, then 2 seconds later, Raj Jr
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