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God's Day International
As humans, our collective will has us cast our gaze to the stars above in search of answers to the questions about who we are at times, those of us without faith, that is. For many of us with faith these questions can still linger, especially with concepts like Intelligent Design being roundly dismissed as if a central focal point of intelligence and wisdom is in fact so very far-fetched after all. Forgive me if I don't completely buy into the concept of evolution without an Almighty Consciousness. Perhaps it is the neanderthal in me reluctant to give up notions of deity and afterlife. Having said all this I have decided to set a countdown to the day I believe adequately represents, at least for me, one of our most promising efforts yet to reach out and discover new life and... what's so funny? lol (eh-HEM) On April 11, 1970 the Apollo 13 mission had a lift-off. Regardless to me of what that undertaking has yielded in terms of verifiable proof of God is completely beside the point. An international day of celebration for the concept of Intelligent Design is an international holiday for the creator of heaven and earth, of all that's seen and unseen, and indeed, calls for celebration.
Custom Performance Offer!!!
Book me for your next holiday or birthday bash!Featured acoustic performance will be sure to include:
*references to things you suggest for subject matter
*times, other dates, months or traditional family lore
*any other relevant points including your name
*reminders, inside jokes
*lists of names or other events
*subversive messages, metaphors
Experiment with this trial offer. Questions?
Introduction...
...near the end of the twentieth century a child with an extraordinary gift to connect with others abandons a concerned family of eccentric musicians and conceptualists. Only one can bring her back into the fold before her light is extinguished by the cold and sometimes cruel world. These are the Chronicles of Wasi.
"Quit talkin bout mah sister, chump!"
"Dis is bout YOU, fool!"
"Oh! My bad! Uh, proceed, den, sh*t! Do I ever FIND her ass, though?"
"You juss gotta wait an SEE, sucka! Now keep it down, folks is listenin!"
brought to you by myspace... :)
I n a secluded field two balls of light appeared precisely three meters above the ground two meters apart and then vertically split into four travelling in opposite directions from the center, each to be immediately followed by another making a total of eight momentarily before they all vanish blinding any observer just long enough to avoid catching a glimpse of the two standing figures appearing within the glow. Once the dance of light faded these two individuals began swiftly shuffling about, apparently in search of something valuable. Wasi of Cicero just happened to be off to the side finishing off a Newport he didn't want them to see him with, so he quickly disposed of it.
"Wanna explain that nasty habit to Starfleet?"
"What took you mf's so goddamn long? That's what I wanna know! I thought I was STUCK back here in '06 for good to live out the rest of my life as 'Wesley Washington'!"
...and now these messages...
And In This Corner...
"Hey, Gina, I'm home!"
"Hey baby!"
"Did my girlfriend call?"
"Your who?"
"Lindsay! Quit playin! What time? What she say? Did she leave a number?"
"She's getting married."
"What?! No!!"
"What's wrong?"
"She can't get married!"
"You're married."
"So? This girl wants me to divorce YOU and marry HER. Like THAT makes any sense. You're the logical choice, everybody can see that. Send her flowers for me! Twelve long stemmed red roses! I'm gettin BACK my girl, goddammit!"
"I ain't sendin her no flowers! Why would I do that?"
"Gina. You're my wife. You not even gon help?"
"I ain't helpin' you cheat!!"
"It ain't cheatin!! I'm goin by what we agreed the day before we got married."
"I'm not sendin that girl no flowers."
"Why not? I'd do it for you!! I don't say sh*t when your boyfriend leave his nasty drawers on my pillow! He did that sh*t TWO TIMES last week! TWICE. That's disrespectful, I'm sorry."
"Well, we broke up."
"That ain't my fault! Gimme that phone!"
(i'm just playin... haha...)
Punishments/Rewards: Molding The Younger Wife
With the onset of the feminist movement women who possess an abundance of the 'right traits' are quickly arriving, and in great numbers, at the position where they are able to set the tone, if not completely define the very nature of their relationships with men in their lives. It is my belief that this phenomenon will drive the more mature man towards the younger, less experienced woman. It should be noted that Aristotle once wrote about what he considered the most appropriate age difference in a husband and wife (or was that Plato? lol).
When 'BAD' behavior calls for punishment one of the following should be performed:
"the HOT seat" - wife strips down to bra and panties to receive firm smack on her bum. repeat until desired 'rosy' effect is achieved.
"the TICKLE torture" - bound loosely at the wrists and ankles with satin (or cotton), wife's most sensitive areas are tickled until husband sees tears or smells pee. this punishment is based on the theory that a woman can only laugh so long before one of these two things occur.
The Intellectual, Spiritual and Psychological Development of Man Throughout History
1. Man becomes aware of himself.
2. Man becomes aware of God.
3. Man attempts to acknowledge the ways of God through law but not everyone becomes aware of God at the same time so not everyone supports this effort, and no one agrees on what God prefers.
4. Man becomes aware of his limited view of woman and all hell breaks loose.
...and now we resume our programming!
Special Bulletin!
(fictional news)Concerned parents speak out in protest in response to sexually explicit blogging on MySpace. The heightened controversy surrounds a coin-tossing game of sexual favors and multiple partners on college campuses along the west coast and has both parents and religious leaders concerned, not only about the spreading of sexually transmitted disease, but by what they're calling 'a perpetual erosion of moral fiber' in today's youth culture. Stephanie, who didn't want her last name revealed, complained about the pressure to engage in the activity, which has become prevalent at keg parties in her sorority. "When people start asking you to do things that make you feel cheap or violated it's just not fun anymore." Tom, the spokes person for the insanely popular online networking service could not be reached for comment.
'Sucker'(sex games)
Stupid game. Basically it's spin the bottle except with quarters or whatever. Three girls toss and the oddball does a 'favor' for the person on her left or right depending on heads or tails. Although I'd probably do it with a couple of supermodels. Gisele's kinda cute!