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very own MySpace LayoutsThe book was written by Captain Jim. It is full of many hillarious things that you should not be doing at church. Why not take a look at it?Examples from this Book:
Sleeping - We all have those times when we are just really tired. It could be from the job the day before or just staying up to watch that new show on TV. But when at church, it is best to try and stay awake. If you fall asleep, ANYTHING could happen. Someone could take your Bible while you're sleeping and hide it somewhere; then there's the possibility that you could snore; then there is the possibility that if you talk in your sleep that you might say something you wouldn't want anyone to hear; if you sleep walk, you might walk right up to the pastor and start kicking him because you're having a dream that a monster is attacking you; or if you have a bedwetting problem, you might go right on the pew, causing a smell to fill the whole church. So if you know that you are going to fall asleep, keep some coffee or an energy drink hidden within the church. Just avoid bringing a pillow with you because someone might grab it while you're asleep causing you to bang your head on the pew. But usually there is someone next to you who will smack your head as soon as the first signs of drool are flowing out of your mouth...
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