Ambassador of Kickyourassador

About Me

I'm a dork. I like brewing my own beer. I like getting excited about things. I listen to records. i go out to eat a lot. i drink lean body shakes. i like yelling at my roommates cat. i hang out with my mom a lot. I am pretty tough. i drink irish whiskey and i shotgun beer. i'm busy. i fall asleep watching the simpsons dvd commentary. i'm a piece of shit.

My Interests

talk radio. cheap vinyl. pho. shit-kickin country. fantasy baseball. t&c surf design. bagels with lox. dog-sitting. paramedic school. running. trying to stop being more than i am. choking down thorazines and sniffing glue. kicking out the jams.

I'd like to meet:

Andy Kaufman, lisa loeb, the silver surfer, Boss Hog, bill murray, steve mcqueen, christopher merloni

Music:

Red Forty, Lucero, With Honor, AAA, Smoking Popes, Drag the River, young guns 2 sdtrk, johnny cash, Against Me!, GUNS 'N ROSA PARKS, fucked up, suicide file, minor threat, Bane, this bike is a pipe bomb, latterman, hank williams III, hank williams, waylon jennings, willie nelson, sinking ships, amendment 18, springsteen, the loved ones, Ruiner, the unicorns, lenny & the piss poor boys, t-rex, mc5top 5 songs right now: 1. not fine- drag the river 2. these eyes- the guess who 3. dodging bullets- lucero 4. the disco before the breakdown- against me! 5. skinhead- darkbuster

Movies:

old school, big daddy, lord of the rings, winged migration, royal tennenbaums, swingers, braveheart, man in the moon, willow, peewee's big adventure, unbreakable, stalag 17, marx brothers, goodfellas, a midnight clear, indiana jones, great escape, neverending story, fight club, joe dirt, back to the future, teen wolf, adventures of baron munchausen, blue planet, halfbaked, star wars, napoleon dynamite, city of god, garden state, young guns 1 and 2, the ladies man, goonies, karate kid 1-3, die hard, groundhog day

Television:

Rescue me, home movies, futurama, simpsons, quantum leap, beavis and butthead, arrested development, always sunny in philadelphia, lost, heroes, planet earth, man vs. wild

Books:

presently: into the wild, paramedic's field manual (brady)

Heroes:

Andy Kaufman, Aquaman, Andre Dawson, silver surfer, the 'gotta make the donuts' guy from dunkin donuts commercials, the Gooch

My Blog

NEW Great American Hero or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Raw Tomato

I think deep down- or even not so deep- all any guy really wants to do is be a hero. and i mean like 'save a bunch of nuns from a burning bus' hero, not an 'I donated to the MS Walk for Life' hero. ...
Posted by Ambassador of Kickyourassador on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

slappin it and clappin it

You know what bothers me? ebonics. slang is one thing, but speaking improperly in this day and age is a little ridiculous. i mean, immigrants have to learn english to get by and take citizenship te...
Posted by Ambassador of Kickyourassador on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

I love technology... always and forever.

Why is my mood thingy a kitten? The kitten doesn't effectively reflect my current mood. a sad clown would work. or a retired garbage man from new jersey. or a train conductor. I'm bad at myspacin...
Posted by Ambassador of Kickyourassador on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Awwwwwwwww, work out!

So I go to the gym a lot. Not because I'm cool, but because I have no life so I figure going to the gym will be a somewhat constructive thing to do with my spare time. Anyways, I go to the YMCA and ...
Posted by Ambassador of Kickyourassador on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Dog Experiences Best Day of His Life for 400th Consecutive Day

SANTEE, CAFamily dog Loki experienced the best day of his life for the 400th straight day Monday, the black Labrador retriever reported. "I got to go outside! I got to sniff the bush!" Loki said, wag...
Posted by Ambassador of Kickyourassador on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Props to props

Props to Brooks for bringing props to my attention. I think props are great. they make people (like me and brooks) feel good, to give them and receive them. So go out into the world and be excellent t...
Posted by Ambassador of Kickyourassador on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

I call bullshit on hurricanes.

Seriously. WTF. I'm sick of having to worry about my mom and sister getting blown away every week and half. I live in FL for 18 years and hardly have any hurricanes, now when i am on the other side...
Posted by Ambassador of Kickyourassador on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

vice do's and don'ts of drinking

Ideally, men only drink beer. That way, when you are kind enough to get a round, you don't have a bunch of L.A. faggots saying, "I'll have a raspberry vodka with a splash of Citron and a fucking lime"...
Posted by Ambassador of Kickyourassador on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Let Us Freak

By Smoove B Love Man Girl, please allow me to break it down for you. You are the love of my life, and I would travel to the ends of the earth to prove my love for you. I would fly to Europe in o...
Posted by Ambassador of Kickyourassador on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST