Peas... profile picture

Peas...

hmmm....

About Me

Singer/songwriter/actor. Raised on an alpaca farm in Ohio, Jared learned the tools to become the man that he is today. "As a young boy, I remember sticking my hand up an alpaca's butt to deposit semen to help it reproduce, but all the while dreaming of a better life. I knew that one day, these alpaca shit infested hands would bring me gold. And then I pulled out a gold nugget from the alpaca's ass. It was really kind of ironic." With the help of the magical gold from the alpacas ass, Jared and his family moved into a beautiful cluster home in Brunswick, OH. (Only 10 or 15 minutes from his previous settlement in Medina ) "We moved right after I graduated from Highschool. With all the gold I had acquired, we opened our own burger joint called 'Our Own Burger Joint'." Today, "Our Own Burger Joint" has changed its name to "McDonalds", and has become one of the most popular burger joints with over 1 billion served every day. After becoming an expert in the ways of a great Big Mac, Jared moved on to bigger and better things. Landing a million dollar deal with Arista Records was one of these. "Clive Davis and I go way back. I even helped him discover Whitney Houston. Man those were the best of times....pre-Bobby." Over the years, Jared has recorded 25 albums, garnered countless Grammys, and won an Oscar for his work in the film "Lady Sings the Blues",loosely based on his life. With all the success that Jared has recieved, he still remains grounded. "Its important to remember where you came from. When I'm on stage singing about love, life and pain...I'm really singing about alpaca ass. And thats what its really all about. Alpaca ass."CHECK OUT MY BLOG .... http://jaredsbrokenrecords.blogspot.com/

I made this music playlist at MyFlashFetish .com.

My Interests

I dont have any. I'm a robot without feelings or emotions. LOOK AT MY BLOG NOW!!!! http://jaredsbrokenrecords.blogspot.com/

I'd like to meet:

Jack Black, Paul Rudd, and Amy Sedaris. *UPDATE* I have now met Amy Sedaris.:) LOOK AT MY BLOG NOW!!!! http://jaredsbrokenrecords.blogspot.com/

Music:

Brandy, Mary J Blige, Amy Winehouse, Jill Scott, Erykah Badu, Lauryn Hill, Musiq Soulchild, Beyonce, Christina Aguilera, Macy Gray, Faith Evans, Blu Cantrell, Aaliyah, Alecia Keys, Mariah Carey, Kindred, India. Arie, Glenn Lewis, Amel Larrieux, Amerie, The Roots, Yummy, Esthero, Keyshia Cole, Lina, Jamie Cullum, Lizz Wright, Madeline Peyroux, Rufus Wainwright, Angie Stone, Dolly Parton, Lisa Shaw, John Legend, Kiley Dean, Nicole Wray, Robin Thicke, Ms.Dynamite, Terri Walker, Toni Braxton, Robyn, Cee-Lo, Jamiroquai, Gorillaz, Astrud Gilberto, Alison Krauss, Stevie Wonder, Minnie Ripperton, Aretha Franklin, Whitney Houston, Ray Charles, Latrelle, B.I.G, Utada Hikaru, Van Hunt, Syleena Johnson, Floetry, Ricky Fante, Luther Vandross, Sergio Mendes, Joi, Gnarls Barkley, Outkast, Missy Elliot, Mary Mary, Yolanda Adams, Destiny's Child, Cheri Dennis, Dwele, Kelis, Nelly Furtado, Gwen Stefani, Pharrell, Nerd, Timbaland, Chaka Kahn, Wycleff Jean, City High, Fugees, Claudette Ortiz, Bonnie Raitt, KD Lang, Michael Buble, En Vogue, Dawn Robinson, Lucy Pearl, Raphael Saadiq, Nikka Costa, Sunshine Anderson, 702, Eric Benet, Beverly Knight, Tamia, Monica, Teedra Moses, Nivea, TLC, The Sounds, Jet, Junior Senior, Hall & Oats, Cindi Lauper, Aya, Scissor Sisters, Janet Jackson, Michael Jackson, Tweet, Brazilian Girls, Frou Frou, Flaming Lips, Ben Folds, Cardigans, Imogen Heap, Emiliana Torrini, Moby, Judy Garland, Nat King Cole, Calvin Richardson, Koffee Brown, Donnie, Sharon Jones & The Dap Kings, Mark Ronson, Shirley Bassey, Timbaland....

Movies:

Far From Heaven, The Color Purple, Life As A House, Judy Berlin, About A Boy, Steel Magnolias, Goonies, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, Silence of the Lambs, Royal Tennenbaums, Wet Hot American Summer, Best In Show, Waiting For Guffman, Donnie Darko, Cherish, Teen Witch, Magdeline Sisters, Mother, 9 to 5, Flight Of the Navigator, Crash, The Baxter, Beetlegeuse, Brokeback Mountain, Mean Girls, SLums Of Beverly Hills, Virgin Suicides, The Shape Of Things, Milo & Otis, Undertow, Twin Falls Idaho, Imaginary Heroes, Machinist, A Love Song For Bobby Long, Mother, Garden State, Ghost World, Chost Busters 1&2, Hotel Rwanda, Dummy, Enemy Mine, Dark Crystal, Labrynth, Mirrormask, Pieces Of April, Napolean Dynamite, Kill Bill 1 &2, Junebug, Drop Dead Gorgeous, The Brady Bunch Movie, The Wiz, Session 9, Moulin Rouge, The Good Girl, CLockwatchers, Shattered Glass, Heathers, Laramie Project, Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, Mystery Science Theater 3000, Edward Scissorhands, Evita, Lilo & Stitch, Beauty & the Beast, Alladin, The Little Mermaid, The Incredibles, Monsters Inc, Finding Nemo, Toy Story 1&2, Jurassic Park, Collateral, Ferris Beuler's Day Off, The Deep End, Down With Love, The Devil's Backbone, House Of Sand & Fog, Hearts in Atlantis, Harold & Maude, 40 Year Old Virgin, Shaun Of The Dead, Serial Mom, Don't Tell Mom The Babysitter's Dead, Little Monsters, Chronicles of Narnia, Northfork, Corpse Bride, Nightmare Before Christmas, Ed Wood, Goodnight & Goodluck, Everything is Illuminated, Eternal Sunshine Of the Spotless Mind, Matchstick Men, Where the Truth Lies, Deep End, American Splendor, Rushmore, About Schmidt.....

Television:

Moesha :), Stranger's With Candy, Saved By The Bell (not the college years, or the new class), Will & Grace, Boston Public, Gilmore Girls, Sienfeld, Family Guy, Simpsons, Futurama, The Critic, Sealab, Scrubs, Ed, Living Single, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Desperate Housewives, The Office, Drawn Together, the Cosby Show, Roseanne, I Love Lucy, Golden Girls, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Project Runway, Saturday Night Live (not lately), The Carol Burnett Show, Carnivale, Six Feet Under, The Oblongs...

Books:

Wigfield............. Is that all I have tried to read...yes yes, I think so.

My Blog

Missing you...

Missing you from Mars.......
Posted by Peas... on Mon, 25 Jun 2007 06:55:00 PST

Brandy involved in fatal car crash.....

Los Angeles (E! Online) - R&B singer Brandy was involved in a fatal car accident last month, and it appears the songbird may have been at fault. The smash-up took place at roughly 10:30 a.m. on De...
Posted by Peas... on Thu, 25 Jan 2007 10:49:00 PST

Check out this video: Gay Robot

Gay RobotUmm, this is freakin' hilarious!
Posted by Peas... on Wed, 10 Jan 2007 11:23:00 PST

Amy Winehouse....

Not sure if you people have heard of Ms. Amy Winehouse...but she's awesome. So I'm offering her new album Back 2 Black for free. Just click here... ...
Posted by Peas... on Thu, 30 Nov 2006 03:20:00 PST

A survey....

I'm bored.... 1. Do you like chinese food?  Yes.....A LOT. 2. How big is your bed? Well its not really my bed...and its not very big at all. 3. Is your room clean? Not unless Jerry cleans it. 4. ...
Posted by Peas... on Thu, 30 Nov 2006 02:46:00 PST

FAKE!:)

This guy is using my name and my picture for his profile. I just want it to be known...I would post it on his profile but i cant because i have to be his friend before I can comment. click here...
Posted by Peas... on Sat, 15 Apr 2006 01:33:00 PST

CHECK THIS OUT!!!!

So I thought I would make a music profile. We'll see what comes out of it...if anything. CHECK IT OUT! http://www.myspace.com/jaredscherermusic...
Posted by Peas... on Thu, 06 Apr 2006 11:52:00 PST

Karaoke...I think thats how you spell it.

So I've been doing this karaoke contest for about a month now. Its every Saturday night. Its funny because all these shitty singers get up there and sing...(because thats what karaoke is) and then I g...
Posted by Peas... on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST