incendiary mercenary onanist profile picture

incendiary mercenary onanist

don't you know you've got to SPANK THE MONKEY?!

About Me

Honesty is both beautiful and painful yet it remains my only excuse. I remain unapologetic about that which I come to love. I like 'St. Anger' so if you don't and feel the need to tell me you really should just drop to your knees and suck it for example. Everything is better when I don't break the containment of my pants. My ideal life would be spent playing my guitar, working out, falling from high places and masturbating. I intend on making this happen. I love 19th century style facial hair (even if its on a woman)! Falsetto vocals rule you! I hate cell phones, ALL religions, being blamed for things I didn't do, comforters, and Pink Floyd. Everything else in this world can count itself amongst that which I like. If you want to add me (besides being a sick fuck) you best speak freak cause no matter how well we know each other "for real", everyone is expendable! I do NOT add bands or bars here go to the horns to the heavens' page. Thomas' Myspace Editor V4.4 Past uniform."Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if they made a difference in the world. But, the Marines don't have that problem" -- Ronald Reagan
The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Sixth Level of Hell - The City of Dis!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers) Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers) Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful) Very High
Level 3 (Gluttonous) Very High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious) High
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy) Very High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics) Extreme
Level 7 (Violent) Extreme
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers) Very High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous) Very High
Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test Which mythical creature resides in your soul? (11 Results + Pictures)
CERBERUS
You are a cerberus. A cerberus is a massive, black, three-headed dog. In Greek mythology there was a cerberus that guarded the gates of Hades, near the river Styx. The cerberus represents all that is dark and evil. The cerberus stands for death, darkness, despair, and degradation. The cerberus is a fearsome creature that is intimidating and ominous. It is violent and ill-tempered.
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According to experts, my personality type is :
Border Line Psycho Killer


  • Take the Ink Blot Personality Quiz at JokesUnlimited.com

    My Interests



    I'd like to meet:

    my demise. But Lemmy first.

    Music:

    I loathe and abhor Pink Floyd and all rap since '93.

    Movies:

    'Sin City', 'Smokey and the Bandit', anything with Chasey Lain!

    Any movie that is about crushing your enemy seeing him driven before you and hearing the lamentation of the women.

    Television:

    the porn monitor is currently providing me with football it does this every fall. Cartoons and 'Law & Order' (regular or SVU), 'Burn Notice'

    Her cooking is the key ingredient!

    Books:

    are good to read

    Heroes:

    All past present and future U.S. service personel.

    this guy

    and Norman Reedus.

    My Blog

    CROWBAR - nothing (music video)

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5hjkiaruAeg one of my all time favorite songs! While I'm not 100% sold on the video (at least the beginning) he does kinda look like me so that is cool. Liste...
    Posted by incendiary mercenary onanist on Fri, 22 Aug 2008 03:47:00 PST

    I am NOT the Father World tour 2008

    April 1-2- Montego Bay, JamaicaJune 13-25- Denmark, England, Scotland, and Sweden,  NorwayJuly 19- Chicago, ILJuly 26 - Philadelphia and DelawareSeptember  8,9- St.Louis   &nb...
    Posted by incendiary mercenary onanist on Mon, 02 Jun 2008 04:50:00 PST

    state of the world address m$%@rfuckers!

    I first feel the need to remind all (and yes even sometimes myself) that no matter how bad you think things may be going in your life somewhere in this very world somebody has it so far worse. After...
    Posted by incendiary mercenary onanist on Wed, 14 May 2008 06:37:00 PST

    porn humor

    A man was feeling very depressed and walked into a bar and ordered a triple scotch. As the bartender poured him the drink he remarked, "That's quite a heavy drink. What's wrong?" After quickly downin...
    Posted by incendiary mercenary onanist on Wed, 16 Jan 2008 03:53:00 PST

    advantage...women

    Ladies as much as youthink we are lucky for our ability to pee while standing up just remember if we start coughing while doing so it is more of a curse! At least while you ease natural and cough you ...
    Posted by incendiary mercenary onanist on Mon, 23 Jul 2007 02:37:00 PST

    FINALLY! Proof women are cold blooded!

    "COMFORTERS"!All the proof one needs. I shall save myself with my newfound hint at concern of my personal health by declaring I will NEVER again sleep with a comforter. What sun dwelling creature deci...
    Posted by incendiary mercenary onanist on Thu, 12 Jul 2007 01:33:00 PST

    I think the medical term is "micropenis"...

    ..> Body: Ladies so you know the shirts/dresses that have the seam right under your boobs and flow freely below it are supposed to be used by pregnant women so if you aren't currntly with child, ...
    Posted by incendiary mercenary onanist on Tue, 29 May 2007 12:20:00 PST

    My balls are showing.

    I want to jump off of something high right now. I don't care about how I land I just want the feel of the fall. I am not looking for injury, just not interested in burdening myself with thinking far e...
    Posted by incendiary mercenary onanist on Tue, 13 Mar 2007 01:55:00 PST

    My magnetic genitals! (Gentlmen tell me I ain't alone)

    Alright folks here are my latest thoughts (they are in fact reoccurring). This is for the guys as seriously your responses could advance science (at least in my mind). First for my long haired brother...
    Posted by incendiary mercenary onanist on Sun, 18 Feb 2007 08:14:00 PST

    What I deserve.

    I only deserve what I earn and I've earned NOTHING. I really wish this was a universal attitude but humans (and especially Americans) are greedy and self important. Never tell me I deserve anythi...
    Posted by incendiary mercenary onanist on Wed, 07 Feb 2007 01:42:00 PST