Darth Chipotle profile picture

Darth Chipotle

Toujours en action avec ma bite...

About Me

My great grand-aunt had cataracts in one eye and it was all cloudy like one of those frosty marbles I used to collect in the fourth grade but that last time I saw her I was three. I was scared of her eye I recall. She would look at me and I would hide cause in that eye I saw scary stuff. We used to have bunnies as a kid. There were a lot of them all fluffy like bunnies tend to be. There was this big white one that I tried pulling out of its cage. I did by its legs. When I picked it up it went all insane (couldnt follow it down the rabbit hole.), and twisted to get away. It slashed my throat with its claw. I looked down and my shirt was all red and bloody. It sucked. My mom wanted to get rid of the bunnies after that but my dad said no. Later I went back and all the bunnies were dead. Ants had started to get to them already and the bunnies were eyeless and no longer fluffy. We never had bunnies after that. I always wanted to fly when I was small and I would go to the roof and look down and would be too scared to jump so I asked God to let me fly and I raised my little arms and hands to the sky and the sun was in my eyes. I didn’t fly and I screamed at the sky that I hated God. I was like five or six. That was actually one of the first sins I confessed to the bishop when I had my first communion. I was eight. After the mass we had a party in the countryside and a wall of huge stones collapsed on me. But I didn’t die cause I’m still here unless I did die and this is the afterlife I was condemned to which sucks cause shit still smells like shit and I still can’t fly. Eww I don’t like milk ice cream. No likey for me bikey. Dykey no likey. Dead people are cold and hard. At my grand-uncle's funeral I touched his face. It was saddy. Its sad when people are dead but its even sadder when you see people who should be dead but aren’t. When I was fourteen I went to México City with my grandmother. While we were there they had found my grandmas sister who and been lost for a long time. She had been beaten up by some petty thugs and ended up at this mental asylum in the outskirts of the city. These women were the unwanted: mentally retarded, physically handicapped or just plain old. It was like a huge brick warehouse surrounded by a yard and then a very high wall lined with razorwire, (the new jerusalem?). There were guards at the gate and we were padded down by them. It smelled not too nice there; Urine and feces mostly and the over all stench of delirium. The women wandered around the yard in white robes like ghosts: dirty soiled ghosts. This one lady showed me the pretty yellow sparrows she was feeding. I’m sure they were pretty indeed if only I could have seen them too. They took us finally to see my great-aunt Raquel. Her gaunt frame was bound by leather straps to her flimsy wire bed. She recognized no one and my grandmother tried not to cry cause she was so badass fishing marlins in her youth off the mexican coast. We left her there that day but my grandmother eventually had her moved to a proper hospital. Ladies in insane asylums are very kindly. They come up to you and touch you like you were their lost child. At times they cry. There was a woman with only one arm and burn scars that at one point ran up to me her eyes wide open and listless. But I wasn’t scared or anything not like the time I dreamed that I was standing in front of a table on it which was the bloody flayed body of a calf with the face of my mother. She raised her head with hollow eye sockets and murmured things. That indeed was scary. When I go to a buffet I stock up on Jell-O and ambrosia. At this one I go to once in a while they have all you can drink horchata. I love horchata. Whore-chata. Puta juice. Juicy juice. Jooze! Jews. Jews for Jesus. Hey-Zeus. Real mean guys. Real men love Jesus and Jesus loves real men.
I edited my profile with Thomas Myspace Editor V3.6 !

My Interests

art stuffsJeezus Cristo Super Estar GAZPACHO!

I'd like to meet:

Qui que vous soyez, je me suis toujours fiee a la bonte des inconnus... le silence est l'esprit des sots, et l'une des vertus du sage. quand Dieu vous donne un cadeau, il egalement des mains vous un fouet ; et sa seulement utilisation si pour la mutilation d'individu...j'ai 24 ans mais je fais plus vieux...les enfants qui vivent seul avec leur mere ont une expression plus serieuse que des autres, d'intello, peintre, ou d'ecrivain...moi c'est normal, je suis peintre... si le monde vous deteste, vous savez qu'il m'a deteste avant qu'il vous ait deteste. Si vous etiez du monde, le monde aimerait ses propres : mais parce que vous n'etes pas du monde, mais moi vous a choisi hors du monde, donc le monde vous deteste.... S'ils m'ont persecute, ils vous persecuteront egalement....il n'y a aucun malheur qui puisse etre si grande qu'il ne pourrais pas etre vaincu. cependant, la facon dont on s'y prend soi-meme face l'adversite est une indication plus claire de caractre que tous les mots qu'on parle. ils peuvent arriver les choses comme on n'a pas prevu, mais chaque jour on fait un choix. on ne peut pas retrouver le temps perdu; donc choisissez sagement. entretenez le feu.

Music:

smashing pumpkins, cibo matto, skinny puppy, la mala rodriguez, peaches, air, sleepy jackson, nick cave, velvet underground, pj harvey, siouxsie, yeah yeah yeahs, fugees, EBTG, patsy cline, M.I.A., julieta venegas, jacki-o, johnny cash, leonard cohen, and mazzy star...

Movies:

fellini, almodovar, bergman, miike, schnabel, inarritu, waters, greenaway, von trier, korine, warhol, lynch, cuaron...

Books:

the secret life of salvador dali, anything written by garth ennis, djuna barnes, dorothy parker, janet frame, truman capote, sei shonagon, neil gaiman, jean rhys, david sedaris...

Heroes:

nightcrawler, henry darger, divine, edith massey, alejandro jodorowsky, mum, leigh bowery, aldo nadi...WOLVERINE!

My Blog

To Do List

so my sis posted a blog with a list of goals and experiences she wishes to accomplish in her lifetime; such as base jumping swimming with various marine wildlife and so on. so i, in turn, have come up...
Posted by Darth Chipotle on Thu, 24 Apr 2008 11:04:00 PST

Turkey Melts in the Muslim World.

(from a letter to pam dated april 7th 2008)p,hope this letter finds you in the best of spirits which by reading your last letter most surely will. looks like me and danielle will be coming to tunisia ...
Posted by Darth Chipotle on Mon, 07 Apr 2008 01:18:00 PST

artist bio 101

so to celebrate my 21st (21st i say!) bday this sunday ive decided to share with yall a lil insight into the gluttonous chimera of my embittered personality.ok so theres nothing worse than writing abo...
Posted by Darth Chipotle on Thu, 15 Nov 2007 01:26:00 PST

yeee haw! i love the anti-satan ’delete this guy’ bulletin!

so while going through the bulletins posted in the past few days i noticed alot with the subject line 'delete this guy'. bored and terrified i open it up to find that it was another guilt trap chain ...
Posted by Darth Chipotle on Mon, 03 Sep 2007 01:30:00 PST

a reminder from your friendly neighborhood bartender

someting i wrote in reference to a 'dos and donts' bulletin written by a bartender/waiter thats currently in circulation:so i didnt write this but feel obligated to repost it. there is however one thi...
Posted by Darth Chipotle on Mon, 20 Aug 2007 04:48:00 PST

10 Things i Learned In Catholic Catechism.

So while I was at the gym today a series of memories caught me unaware. I began to recall the spring and summer of my eighth year leading up to my first communion. I began my catechism classes here in...
Posted by Darth Chipotle on Tue, 19 Jun 2007 09:48:00 PST

musical playlist

so i was on itunes today and noticed for the first time the section where celebrities have posted their music playlists with small explainations why they chose each particular song. so as i was readin...
Posted by Darth Chipotle on Wed, 11 Apr 2007 12:36:00 PST

jeezus what was wrong with me?

so i recently encountered the horrid ghosts of illustration past having unearthed a hearty batch of drawings i did in 5th grade. the year was 1991, the start of a new decade that would see the death o...
Posted by Darth Chipotle on Wed, 28 Mar 2007 11:57:00 PST

the barman speaks

The Barman SpeaksOur resident bartender skewers the Top 10 myths about drinkmastersBy Ryan OsterbeckMost people would sell their soul along with Grandma's house and their yarbels for the ability to ro...
Posted by Darth Chipotle on Mon, 26 Mar 2007 05:05:00 PST

Marie Antionette, bake sales and the IRA...

AIM IM with pam11:31 AMP- oh I saw Marie Antoinette dude I ain't listening to your movie reviews no moG- what dont tell me you liked itP- loved itG- grossP- no dude you dont understand i totally got h...
Posted by Darth Chipotle on Mon, 12 Mar 2007 12:47:00 PST