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Lilly's Mommy

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About Me

Before I was a Mom I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby. I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous. I never thought about immunizations. Before I was a Mom- I had never been puked on. Pooped on. Chewed on. Peed on. I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts. I slept all night. Before I was a Mom I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests. Or give shots. I never looked into teary eyes and cried. I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin. I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep. Before I was a Mom I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put them down. I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt. I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much. I never knew I would love being a Mom. Before I was a Mom- I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body. I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby. I didn't know that bond between mother and her child. I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy. Before I was a Mom- I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay. I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment, or satisfaction of being a Mom. I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mom. MyWackoSpace MySpace Generators Contact Table Generator Banner Generator MySpace Codes
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My Interests

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Im content with those in my life...

My Blog

All the little things...

So, I think Lilly may just be the smartest girl ever! I bought her 2 new books last weekend and she loves them so we've read them at least a dozen times each since I bought them. Last night while I wa...
Posted by on Fri, 15 May 2009 06:35:00 GMT

I’m really starting to wonder...

I think I might, just might, be a bitch...
Posted by on Tue, 22 Jul 2008 01:49:00 GMT

Updates galore...

For those who don't know, last wednesday, I spent all day in court with my mom getting a restraining order for both Lilly and I against Salem.  The week before we were over at the apartment visit...
Posted by on Mon, 26 Nov 2007 00:24:00 GMT

A new and better life for Princess Lilly and Mommy

Today is a good day.  Last night was a rough night for Lilly.  She hasn't been eating very well.  Its been a struggle to get the little princess to eat.  After waking up several ti...
Posted by on Wed, 07 Nov 2007 12:26:00 GMT

Bye bye Myspace

I need to take some time off from my life, friends, and myspace.  There is much thinking and figuring out I need to do.  Beloved friends, please do not take offense if I don't return your ca...
Posted by on Thu, 02 Aug 2007 10:45:00 GMT

Finally, in Florida!!!!!

After what seemed like a week of flying (but in reality was only about 7 hours), Lilly and I finally arrived in beautiful Florida last night.  And boy, Rachel wasn't kidding when she said it was ...
Posted by on Thu, 19 Jul 2007 08:41:00 GMT

Life is getting better...

Salem and I went to our first counselling appointment yesterday.  I know it was very hard for him to decide to give us another chance.  It started out rough, but ended well.  Afterwards...
Posted by on Tue, 17 Jul 2007 21:25:00 GMT

I feel so alone...

I feel so lonely, almost all the time.  Even with Lilly sitting right next to me, it seems that ache just never leaves.  I started smoking again.  Not so great, I know.  Meh. ...
Posted by on Sun, 15 Jul 2007 20:47:00 GMT

Staying positive

I'm trying so hard to relax and let the pieces of my life come back together.  For a little while the spontaneous crying had stopped, but now its back and worse than it was before.  I try to...
Posted by on Mon, 09 Jul 2007 14:17:00 GMT

Why does life hurt so bad?

I just don't understand.  How can I be so in love with a man who doesn't love me back?  And why can't I just stop loving him?  Why can't I just stop hurting?  Every second of every...
Posted by on Sun, 08 Jul 2007 23:01:00 GMT