Science. Anatomy. Bizarre experiments with fish and automobiles. I like chainsaws and amateur dentistry, and maybe the two combined. I enjoy hanging around in north london with a camera waiting for george michael to do something absurd. I like fast cars and dirty women, but never get to drive either.
I play the guitar a bit, and listen to lots of music. I enjoy watching people and looking at women as they walk down the road. I enjoy sitting and thinking about stuff. Quite often I pretend I am deaf, though this only works when I don't have my headphones on, but when I have my headphones on it doesn't matter, huh?
I am interested in lots of things. It's all so damned fascinating.
I'd like to meet:
On here? Generally? In an ideal world? tomorrow? Stupid.
On Here: haven't got a clue. Intellectuals. Artists. Freaks. Women with bizarre idiosyncracies. Ex goths. People with a bit of wit. How the hell should I know?
Generally: People with more money and less talent than me.
Ideal world: oh I gave up on that only last week. Pass me a beer please.
Tomorrow: the ride to work is so boring nowadays. I remember once a bloke got up in the middle of the train, I guess he was some kind of actor or poet or something, and announced nervously that he was going to read a bit of poetry. Actually, if he hadn't been wearing tweed and had such a perfect accent I would have thought he was a loony. He stood up and read something, it was quite forgettable actually, and his nerves no doubt didn't do it justice. At the end of it, in a crowded carriage, only I and a girl at the other end in a pink hat clapped.
Tomorrow I want to meet either him, or the girl in the hat.
Music:
I keep coming across songs that have been lying around in people's CD stacks unforgotten and unnoticed, and thinking them at the time the most amazing songs I have heard. My guess is there is a lot of undiscovered music out there. I guess that's why I am here. I like anything as long as it's good. But I like the shite stuff too.
Movies:
I hate the film you get on your coffee cup when you don't use properly whipped cream in it. Better to keep it black.
I also dislike clingfilm sandwiches. You think you are eating something healthy but there are so many nasty chemicals in clingfilm, like phlalates for instance, that is all over your lettuce, or tuna, or whatever. I am not talking about sandwiches I am talking about clingfilm. It's nasty stuff, and then you throw it away and it's totally non-biodegradable which means that it slowly gets powdered up in landfill sites by the action of worms and roots and ends up straight back in the food chain as tiny indigestible bits of plastic. Yay! brilliant. At least cup-a-soup has a paper packet.
But it's easy to be negative. I do like the film you get when you see a puddle in the road. really pretty colours. And I like a nice film metaphor, of cellulose and plastic, that with a little light makes dreams come alive for an hour. OK, I'll stick with that happy thought.
Television:
Oh yeah, right, it'll never catch on! I mean, you could be out there changing the world, or having mad sex with strangers, or burning down the highway like an adolescent maniac, or just about anything. Or, alternatively, you could sit back and go to Beta-wave consciousness letting somebody else's ideas and experience wash over you.
It's brilliant though. I watch everything apart from soaps, and I secretly watch them too, but don't tell anyone.
Books:
These are brilliant too, reusable, lendable, and all of life's experience is there just for the reading.
I gave up on reading for enlightenment a long time ago. I enjoyed "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance" by Robert Pirsig. I enjoyed Sartre, and milan Kundera. And Nietzsche. Joseph Heller. Luke Rheinhardt. Steinbeck. Blah blah blah. I'd dearly love to write my own book but in the face of such genius I just don't have the arrogance. Makes me wonder about most novel writers nowadays.
Surely they have read amazing books and know intrinsically that their pitiful offering is no where near on that level? Either they know it's rubbish and are just cynically making money out of writing crap, or they really think their books are as good. Sod em, either way the authors are probably mad.
Heroes:
Boris Johnson. Prince Philip. The mad jihadist muslim guy with no hands. Doctor Who. Fidel Castro. Chavez. Che. Yossarian. Zapata. Noam Chomsky. Groucho Marx. Dil the ultimate goth from Brighton. My mom. Mostly nowadays though Boris Johnson. I think he should be president.
