Nikki

I update more on friendster =D http://profiles.friendster.com/lovemari3I'm no longer going to filter my thought/opinions..i missed writing, writing used to be my outlet. In the past couple of months, I kind of restricted myself..and it got a lil bit expensive because whenever i called Anna or Mik it would take me longer to get into details..so yeah..i'm gonna try to update more occasionally here, used to update daily..ayoko nman ma-shock yung mga NFF dyan kc i don't think they know how vocal i can get in friendster..i already got a couple of friends in trouble because of my multiply..how was i supposed to know i should privatize those pics!doing all the wrong things for the right reason..The past couple of years have been a rollercoaster ride to self discovery, I don't think the ride will end anytime soon, but I am learning, learning that's its not always easy to walk away from wrong situations, you'll get out with scratches and scars but as long as I have my friends, I'm sure I'll do just fine. They've been by my side through things you wouldn't believe. It's a great thing when you realize you still have the ability to surprise yourself.I have my entire life to figure out who I am, who I will be. why rush?I'm such a cynic when it comes to relationships, I think getting to know me as girlfriend is kind of a challenge. I dn't like pressure and being told what to do..right now freedom is what I crave. What I miss though is having someone to do nothng with, watch movies, figuring out what to eat, debating on nonsensical things..THAT is what I miss..I don't like being needed, for me that's a turn off..that will have me running at the other direction. I want you to have the life you want and I'll be there, celebrating with you on your highs and comforting you on your lows. I want to be wanted, not neededWoah. This is getting long...I think I should stop na. Oh yeah and in case you're too shy to ask (you shouldn't be though), I have psoriasis *look it up =D and I am 100% pure filipino even if I don't knw my dad.I'm still not ready to move on. I'm currently enjoying standing still. It's sort of like what you were saying how on the one hand, expectations can inspire you, but, then again, they can really let you down. I'm not ready to be let down quite yet. But I still have hope, that one day, I'll take a chance again, in the horrible face of expectation. And it'll be worth it."