Curewitz - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Curewitz is just one guy: Matt Curewitz. You know, kinda like nine inch nails but without all that angst and talent. Curewitz goes by his last name for two reasons: 1) Its not taken already and 2) His brother told him it means "Son of a bitch" in Russian and is therefore cool.Curewitz is not especially talented and you shouldn't listen to his music. However, since you're here now, you're screwed. Curewitz's background is mostly in punk rock but then he got GarageBand and now he spends what remains of his youth sampling and mixing. All of Curewitz's punk rock friends think this is excessively lame and oftentimes throw stuff at him.One last note: Curewitz wants to issue a threatdown to Moby. Anyday, anytime, Moby is going down. Moby's, like 42, or something like that. Plus, he's a vegan. I think he can be taken down.
I try to offer an all-purpose myspace site. For example, while you're here, you should check out my blogs and subscribe Or, if you're a visiual person, you can check out my Toby pictures series. I also have Xombie Matt and Nature by Joce I can also offer you spiritual advise. Ok, the spiritual advice is crap. The best I can come up with is "God only loves your for your body. Satan is interested in your soul." But I do love hearing from you guys. Drop me a line. I respond in kind...

My Interests

Music:

Member Since: 9/4/2006
Band Members: Matt and his Mac
Influences: I am influenced solely by money. That is my only motivating factor in life. See right over there to the right - yeah, that. You can buy my songs right there. They're only $.99 each. You can afford that. I have Happy Meals and Yoohoo I need to pay for!
Sounds Like: In reality, I sound most like Moby and Fatboy Slim. However, I WISH I sounded more like Jesus. If I did, think of all the money I could get from all those Christian music people! I could go on tour with Creed and P.O.D. We would have Stryper as our opening act. I would convert Matisyahu. Then, maybe I would star in a direct-to-video film directed by Kirk Cameron. In about 5 years or so, I'd break down under the stress of it all and start hanging out with the wrong crowd- maybe even Psychic TV. I'd probably set a hotel room on fire while worshipping the dark lord. Word would get out and my loyal Christian following- who up to now had tolerated the fact that I'm Jewish- would desert me in droves. Then, they would come back- but just to protest outside my house and support Rick Santorum for Senate. All in all, not a bad plan.
Record Label: I'm Waiting to Sell Out So Somebody Sign Me!
Type of Label: None

My Blog

Smartass: Healthcare

I think I should be given my own television show. I would base it roughly on these smartass blogs where I talk about smart stuff but fill it up with stupid pictures. AND I would have cheerleaders. Non...
Posted by Curewitz on Tue, 01 Jul 2008 05:36:00 PST

Movie Review: Wall-E

755 years in the future, Earth is a dead planet. It has been wrecked by consumerism run rampant. Sandstorms blow over major cities while in the best of weather a dirty haze obscures the horizon. Manki...
Posted by Curewitz on Sat, 28 Jun 2008 07:38:00 PST

Movie Review: Zombie Strippers

What is a chair?I had to take six philosophy courses for my major in college. No matter who the teacher was, the first class always started with the question, "What is a chair?" Is a stool a chair? Is...
Posted by Curewitz on Fri, 27 Jun 2008 07:08:00 PST

The Power of Breasts

Sometimes Providence hits. I was trying to think of a good, albeit goofy blog topic to write about today. Then my friend, Dave The Shocker, sent me a link to a story about "Harnessing the untapped pow...
Posted by Curewitz on Wed, 25 Jun 2008 01:45:00 PST

Futurama: Ironman

I saw Ironman the other day and I'm going to break with my usual tradition of reviewing every movie I see as everyone who would want to see this flick has already seen it AND I have nothing interestin...
Posted by Curewitz on Mon, 23 Jun 2008 12:45:00 PST

Foot Fetish- UPDATE

Severed feet are washing ashore in Canada. God, do I love saying that line! I mean, those are words that just shouldn't all be put together in one sentence. Severed feet are washing ashore in Canada. ...
Posted by Curewitz on Thu, 19 Jun 2008 12:11:00 PST

Gangsta Gangsta at the top of the list

I'm a big fan of rap music. Let me rephrase that, I'm a big fan of the portion of rap music that is actually good. About 90% of the rap that is produced is derivative drivel. Another 5% of the total r...
Posted by Curewitz on Sun, 15 Jun 2008 08:30:00 PST

Uh-oh

In many ways, the world would be so music easier if we were all robots. Your doctor could also be your mechanic. You could wonder aloud about this human emotion called "love". And we wouldn't have to ...
Posted by Curewitz on Tue, 10 Jun 2008 03:24:00 PST

I Need An Agent

It's strange but electronica music like the type I have posted on my page isn't really my type of music. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the genre but I was never some glow in the dark pacifier sucking ra...
Posted by Curewitz on Tue, 10 Jun 2008 04:57:00 PST

Mr. Chairman, Please Don’t Throw Your Poop At Me

Making fun of religious beliefs is always a thorny business. People are entitled to believe in whatever creed they choose. I have no idea who God is, what started the universe or why they made another...
Posted by Curewitz on Sat, 07 Jun 2008 12:11:00 PST