The Uknightbreed Incident profile picture

The Uknightbreed Incident

a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma

About Me


VIVA LA REVOLUTION !!! the world dont like me and i dont like the world. i refuse to run in the rat race and when i die they can leave my rotting carcass where it falls. regardless of this im still a very happy smiley person ,just a very warped cynical one with a strange sense of humour and a bit of attitude. when i was a kid i wanted to be either father christmas , han solo or a nuclear missile.imagine my dissapointment when the job centre didnt have these jobs vacant. doh !
my 8 words of wisdom :
1.each to there own ,aslong as it doesnt harm anyone else ,whats the fuss ?
2.devils wont be wearing horns ,they will be wearing halos.
3.treat others as you expect to be treated yourself
4.dont shit on your own doorstep.
5.deny yourself nothing.
6.life is for living wether good or bad
7.if life gives you shit ,use it to grow bigger better roses.
8.dont beleive the hype .
my pet hate's are.... fascists , superficial people , bling bling culture , celebs with no talent (love island contestants etc ) , 'most' modern rappers , modernisation , capitalism , economic globalisation , unfunny famous comedians , the european parliment , political correctness ( theres no such thing ! just respect nice people and stand up to the gits of life regardless of there colour ,sex , religion etc) , karaoke (i would rather stick hot needles covered in lemon juice and vinegar into my eyes) , liverpool fc kopite's , boy bands , the way the worlds run and its mad nonsence 2 faced rules.(theres loads more i could put but i would probably get sued or lynched , so i wont bother ) if your not down with that you can kiss my mangina.

My Interests

i love everton fc , eating bananas , cherry flavoured sweets , my family , cooking , my pets (1 dog, 3 ducks, a budgie and a cockatiel ) , mexican food , movies , .. gaming , sunday roast dinner , my computer , the internet , wikipedia , xbox360 , darts , black grape fruit juice , mango juice , milkshakes ,writing , gardening , my own company and personal space , history , moaning about the human race , sex , bacon butties , chillin to music , sleeping , chinese food , gadgets , thinking , smoking 'erb , fishing , italian food , freaky people , spooky things , dominoes , orangutans , hedgehogs (on my family crest), laughing , mythology , being miles from civilisation , macabre / bizarre things. not in any particular order and not much else!

I'd like to meet:

a nymphomaniac manic compulsive cannabis growing woman ,preferably in the mold of any of the following- diana dors , marilyn monroe , sophie loren , raquel welch , bridget bardot , betty page , or Dita Von Teese .
id also like to meet .... god and satan (so i can bang theres heads together), an alien ,john lennon , bob marley , elvis , the dalai lama , the inventor of the bucket , ollie reed , peter cook , the first person to get milk from a cow , a werewolf , a vampire woman (there hot and worth the risk of having my throat ripped out ), a mummy , a time traveller , an android , someone who can really do magic , anyone with an honest soul and an opinion even if it is different to mine.

Music:

kings of leon , ian brown , the stone roses , queens of the stone age , ray lamontagne , bob marley , ub40 , trip hop , a little d&b , house , a little ska (60,s)/dub/rocksteady/northern soul , a little blues , de la soul , the libertines , iggy pop , happy mondays , the charlatans , Gorillaz , james brown , the doors , ocean colour scene , sex pistols , jimmi hendrix , portishead , earthling , massive attack , leftfield , orbital , razorlight , underworld , the strokes , guru , public enemy , beastie boys , tribe called quest , herbaliser , u.n.k.l.e , wu tang clan , cypress hill , mos def , foo fighters , the ramones , black rebel motorcyle club , oasis and loads of other mixed stuff. i like 'MUSIC MADE FOR MOODS' not music made for money....................the ginger one (dirty stop out) has ripped me to shreds for not adding any old skool !....... so , best old skool tracks ........everybody all over the world - fpi project , not forgotten - leftfield , the house crew - keep the fire burning , MI 7 -where rockin down the house , xpansions - move your body , chime - orbital , lost - the gonzo , bombscare - 2 bad mice , the scientist - the bee , the scientist - the exorcist , hooligan 69 - the ragga twins , quadrophonia - quadrophonia , 4 hero - mr kirk , shades of rhythm - exorcist , sultana - te amo , the kraken -n-joi , anthem -n - joi The Horn Track - Egyptian Empire , Made In Two Minutes - Bug Kann & The Plastic Jam ,Sweet Sensation - Shades Of Rhythm , lil louis -french kiss , richie rich -you used to salsa , Marshall Jefferson - Move Your Body , living in darkness - top buzz , nhs - doc scott, Return of the Living Acid - Get Funky! , Zero Zero - Zeroxed , Kid Unknown - Nightmare , LaTour - Blue , L.A. Style - James Brown Is Dead , DubTribe - Mother Earth , The Prodigy - Everybody in the Place , Acen - Trip II The Moon , Eon - Spice , Orbital - Halcyon , Future Sound of London - Papua New Guinea , 2 Bad Mice - Bombscare , Messiah - There Is No Law , Phantom - The Abyss , ..... i will add more when i can think of em !!!........................ fav old skool dj's and mc's...........top buzz crew , grooverider , doc scott , dj ss , dj rap , man parris , micky finn , fabio and ltj bukem + conrad.

Movies:

old boy , sympathy for mr vengeance , drugstore cowboy , sin city , ichi the killer , alien , high risk , The Big Lebowski , pulp fiction , enter the dragon , vertigo , corporation (docu) , lady vengeance , Man Bites Dog ,cheech and chong films , 24 hour party people , ong bak , deuce bigalow 1and 2 , Blow , dirty rotten scoundrels , austin powers , ravenous , the early bond films uptill live and let die , kalifornia , an american werewolf in london , naqoyqatsi ,napoleon dynamite , south park :bigger longer and uncut , 300 , dawn of the dead (original) , saving grace , the 80's lemon popsicle films , sweeny todd (black and white version) , the carry on films , assualt on precinct 13 (original) , superfly , freaks , animal house , abbott and costello films , pans labyrinth , the firm , the doors , network , dead men don't wear plaid , shallow grave , zatoichi , personal services , saving private ryan , bladerunner , black and white horrors , trainspotting , the bellboy , the disorderly orderly , Das Boot , lavender hill mob ,the firm , scum , the general , natural born killers , Ferris Buellers Day Off , oceans 11 (original) , some like it hot , monkey business , Kind Hearts and Coronets , pecker , southern comfort , get carter (original) , The Good the Bad and the Ugly , dr strangelove , Goodfellas , the jerk , the acid house , the warriors , sweet sweet backs bad arse song , the usual suspects , scum , whoops apocalypse , snatch , all the monty python films , mean streets , four rooms , star wars trilogy's , indiana jones trilogy , naked lunch , stir crazy , for a few dollars more , a fistfull of dollars ,reservoir dogs , the hound of the baskervilles (peter cook version ) , the party , midnight express , dead mans shoes , italian job (original) , drunken master , snake in the eagles shadow , lock stock , withnail and i , airplane 1 and 2 , dogma , kung pow , twelve monkeys , the great escape , escape from new york , blackbeards ghost , a clockwork orange , young frankenstein , kellys heroes , the wanderers , 1941 , fear and loathing in las vegas , first blood , weird science , orgazmo , caligula , dumb and dumber , seven , clerks , blazing saddles , the pink panther films (not the new one ) , from dusk till dawn , quadrophenia , The Lady Killers (original) , the thing , weekend at bernies , taxi driver , Audition , animal farm (the cartoon) , Reservoir Dogs , A Tale of Two Sisters , scarface , Groundhog Day , Kung Fu Hustle , The Goonies , Nikita (original) , Bad Taste ,most 50's b movies , 28 days later , The Elephant Man , Donnie Darko , noi albinoi , Waynes World , Big Trouble In Little China , Silence of the lambs , leon , the running man , the black hole , Once upon a time in America , marathon man , the comic strip presents films esp 'more bad news' , The shining , Kill Bill , le hane , one flew over the cukkoos nest , The Seven Samurai , bob hope films , the pianist , Escape from New York , vertigo , arsenic and old lace , gremlins , logans run , romper stomper , american history x , a fish called wanda , les miserables , its a wonderful life , the sleeper , national lampoons vacation films (not xmas 2 - worst film ever ) , pleasantville , westworld , the green mile , ghostbusters , theres something about mary , visitor q (totally weird) , slap shot , murder by death , the shootist , clue , forrest gump , the host and loads loads more.

Television:

scrubs , the simpsons , the young ones , 15 storeys high , doctor who , the news , reeves and mortimer , monkey dust , south park , harry hill , family guy , larry sanders , the new statesman , monkey , the water margin , the muppet show , futurama , curb your enthusiasm , catterick , celebrity roast , weeds , heroes , ideal , drawn together , the mighty boosh , travel sick , american dad , qi , sin cities , nighty night , kick arse miracles , kenny everett , adult swim , eerie indiana , spaced , malcolm in the middle , everbody loves raymond , the green wing , the goodies , police squad , the munsters , monty python , soccer am , batman , the avengers , lost in space , star trek (original series only ,but im not a treckie in anyway shape or form) , porridge , friday night with jonathan ross , the prisoner , later with jools holland , charlie brookers screen wipes , shameless , the gadget show ,peep show , quantum leap , and loads loads more .

Books:

fear and loathing in las vegas (much better than the film),the world according to garp ,alice in wonderland (that story is dark as hell !) ,1984 - george orwell , brave new world , the doors of perception -aldous huxley ,aesop's fables , Roald Dahl - Revolting Rhymes + George's Marvelous Medicine , mr men - mr tickle- mr bump - mr jelly - mr silly - mr daydream . magazines:bizarre ,focus and weed world. i used to love 2000ad comics.

Heroes:

monty python peeps , billy connoly , oliver reed , richard pryor , kenny everett , jimmi hendrix , frankie howard , salvador dali , howard marx , vic reeves and bob mortimer , jack herer , gonzo and animal from the muppets , guy fawkes , john lennon , peter sellers , dixie dean , spike milligan , bob marley , quinton tarantino , peter cook , roland rat , jackie chan , steve martin , Jacco Macacco the fighting monkey , everton fc players , david moyes , peter reid and big dunc ferguson .

My Blog

an example of how fucked up life is :1

customer : that bloody steve mclaren , i want to smack that smug grin off his face.he is a shit england manager.how dare he not kill himself let alone resign.me : yea hes a twat customer : sack the b...
Posted by The Uknightbreed Incident on Fri, 23 Nov 2007 06:10:00 PST

is this the best dj in the world ?

well , is he ?.........no , but hes still better than my mate tomalin . lol i cant remember doobie duck being so camp !...
Posted by The Uknightbreed Incident on Thu, 08 Nov 2007 01:12:00 PST

dear agony: number 19

dear uknightbreedi have a problem i hope you can solve for me.im a liverpool fan and im gutted after losing in the champions league final last week.we lost 2-1 to ac milan .after the result i was depr...
Posted by The Uknightbreed Incident on Wed, 30 May 2007 04:12:00 PST

dear agony: number 18

dear uknightbreedim a reindeer hurder in denmark and i have around 300 reindeer in my flock.its a lonely job as we are out in the frozen wilderness most of the time.to help pass the lonely hours we of...
Posted by The Uknightbreed Incident on Sat, 28 Apr 2007 05:59:00 PST

dear agony: number 17

dear uknightbreedi have a problem i hope you can solve.shes a pink toothbrush, I'm a blue toothbrushim sure we had met somewhere before?shes a pink toothbrush and I think toothbrushThat we met by the...
Posted by The Uknightbreed Incident on Sat, 21 Apr 2007 05:10:00 PST

dear agony: number 16

howdydoody uknightbreedi have a dilemma i want your help with.recently in my life ive found it hard to make new friends.recently though i joined myspace to help in my quest for friendship.this wasnt ...
Posted by The Uknightbreed Incident on Sat, 21 Apr 2007 04:48:00 PST

dear agony: number 15

dear uknightbreedi have a problem i hope you can solve for me.even though a lot of people think im into hardcore drum and bass and gangsta rap , secretly im a disco nut.obviously i dont want to be rid...
Posted by The Uknightbreed Incident on Sun, 08 Apr 2007 02:12:00 PST

dear agony: number 14

dear uknightbreedi have made a huge mistake and i hope you can help.i went to amsterdam on a stag weekend and ended up going a bit over the top.on the day we left i downed a bottle of sambuca before l...
Posted by The Uknightbreed Incident on Sun, 08 Apr 2007 04:51:00 PST

dear agony: number 13

dear uknightbreed im a big scary monster .grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr !i have big sharp teeth .grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr !i have big sharp claws.grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr !i have 6 big red eyes.grrrrrrrrrrrr...
Posted by The Uknightbreed Incident on Thu, 05 Apr 2007 01:04:00 PST

dear agony : number 12

dear uknightbreed i would like some advice .i live in the nottingham area and for most of my life i have lived in poverty.recently though i have aquired some money and managed to turn my life around f...
Posted by The Uknightbreed Incident on Thu, 05 Apr 2007 12:45:00 PST