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Porthos Aurelius

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me


¡Saludos y saludos! Ah, a space for mindless self-indulgence and frivolous communication. How wonderful! Just what the Internets needs. Why should you know about me? Because I could be the most fantastic, fun-loving friend yet most intriguingly complex person you've ever met. Do you dig a challenge? I am a 33-year-old professional journalist who was born and bred in San Antonio. My journey into the Fourth Estate began in 1992 at San Antonio College, where I served for seemingly eons on the The Ranger, the campus rag. In 1997, I transferred to The University Formerly Known As Southwest Texas State, where I spent five semesters studying mass communications, experiencing the "traditional" campus life that I've missed out on, and enjoying hikes at every asthmatic's favorite exercise center -- the hill leading to the Old Main Building. (SWT students would understand.)My accidental excursion into print journalism led me to a brief, financially-costly yet rather exciting tenure as editor and publisher of a local alternative monthly newsmagazine, San Antonio Scene. Now, I get real paychecks from a company that produces several area weekly and monthly publications. Ever want to see samples of the Scene, feel free to ask and schedule an appointment at my bachelor palace. I would then have you sign a liability waiver and wear a biosafety level-4 hazard suit because merely digging for these well-protected newspapers in my closet tends to be risky :-PI'm your typical nice, compassionate, honest, hard-working, responsible, reasonably intelligent, open-minded dreamer with a slightly self-deprecating sense of humor, but never mean-spirited. A nice guy really. I'm content with myself. Pet peeves: bad drivers, perpetual cynics, ignorant, arrogant hypocrites and anyone whose lives revolve totally around reality shows and corporate radio. Props go to progressive-minded human beings who actually use their hearts and brains, and give a damn about world. And those homosapiens aren't affaid to shed light on their geek/dork, eccentric side.Phrases to live by: Better late than never...Anything is possible...Push the button, Frank... Oh my God! They killed Kenny! You bastards!...Hey. Beer. Man...The truth is out there... Happy, happy, joy, joy...All Lies Lead To The Truth...God bless White House interns!...Wassup!...For me to poop on...Bite me
What's Your Sense of Humor?
You're a Sarcastic Quipster You're definitely a bit satirical, i.e. you use a sharp combo of irony and wit to expose what you feel are the unethical or just plain ridiculous aspects of society. You know there's more to comedy than just getting a laugh-- jokes can have the power to change people's minds. Plus, poking fun at others is one of your specialties. Some people might view your sense of humor as a bit dark, but then again, isn't that just life? Sure, it'd be nice if life was like a cake filled with rainbows and smiles and everyone was happy, but it's not and thus, you gotta laugh to get through it!
Personality-Emotion Quizzes

My Interests

Interests include: (boy, does this sound like a Playboy Playmate of the Month personal file or what? Not that I would personally know...) writing (duh), hiking, traveling, reading just about anything, sports collectibles, astronomy, almost any type of music, social activism, plain old partying, moviegoing, surfing the 'Net, San Antonio Spurs (gracias for the fourth title, peasants!), Texas Longhorns, Dallas Stars, Boston Red Sox, petting strange animals, smashing atoms, and smuggling illegals across the border. Chill, folks. That last one is a joke...unofficially.

I'd like to meet:

Nobody in particular. Perhaps a doppelganger in an alternative universe. However, I have my own ideas on the coolest talking heads in American media: Jim Rome, Jim Hightower, Don Imus, Art Bell, David Letterman, Bill Maher, Jon Stewart, Mike Malloy, George Noory, Michael Moore, Janeane Garaofalo, Ariana Huffington, Tavis Smiley. As for my guesses at the identity of the Antichrist? Bill Gates, Rupert Murdoch, Rush Limbaugh, Rev. Pat Robertson (ironic, don't you think?), Pat Buchanan, George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, Ann Coulter (it's "a man," baby!).

Your Mexican Name Is:

Antonio Cruz Sanchez What is your Mexican Name? MySpace Quizzes at PimpSurveys.com



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Music:

Open to most genres: Classic and modern rock, classical, hip-hop, classic blues and jazz, dance, electronica, some pop, R&B and rockabilly, Latin, a little old-school country. A few personal suggestions for musical enlightenment: The Beatles, Pearl Jam, U2, Madonna, Public Enemy, B.B. King, Miles Davis, Led Zeppelin, The Supremes, Beck, Stevie Ray Vaughn, Billie Holliday, Mozart, Beethoven, R.E.M., 2Pac, Rage Against the Machine, Bob Dylan, The Doors, Texas Tornados, Sleater-Kinney, Two Tons of Steel, The Donnas, Prodigy, Outkast, Johnny Cash, Loretta Lynn, The Raveonettes, Garbage, The Toadies (resurrected, yes!), Depeche Mode, The Cure, Terri Hendrix, Girl in a Coma, Squirrel Nut Zippers, Vallejo, N.W.A. (that's right, ol' skool), The White Stripes, The Yeah Yeah Yeahs, The Killers, The Temptations, Robert Johnson, Bruce Springsteen, Beastie Boys, LL Cool J, Franz Ferdinand, Radiohead, Jimi Hendrix, The Ramones, The Eyeliners, Cake, Hole, New Order/Joy Division, Death Cab for Cutie/The Postal Service/Dntel, Elliott Smith, Fiona Apple, Nas, Gorillaz, Metric, The Pipettes, The Strokes, Asheru, Flogging Molly, Kanye West, Moby, Oakenfold, Taking Back Sunday, Morrissey, Lupe Fiasco, Amy Winehouse, System of a Down, Interpol, Bad Religion. BTW: Alternative and college radio rules, repetitive corporate radio drools.

Movies:

I have no specific favorites, although Schindler's List and Citizen Kane rank pretty high up there. And the Star Wars, Matrix and Lord of the Rings trilogies. And Airplane! And Dr. Strangelove. And lots of '80s flicks. And Reservoir Dogs. And Trainspotting. And The Breakfast Club. If you want a more recent pick, can't go wrong with Juno or No Country for Old Men. If you're not a friend of neither Bachelor Party, Strange Brew nor Brazil, then you're simply a heartless human being. But I can't quite shake constant thoughts of Police Academy 3, House Party 3 and Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo. Those rocked, guys.

Television:

Stay away from reality television, kiddos. It's the devil's work. It'll warp your brains, embolden our enemies and weaken the resolve of our allies. Really. Want to be properly entertained? Then consider these visual feasts: Lost, 24, The Simpsons, Family Guy, American Dad, Everybody Hates Chris, South Park, The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, Battlestar Galactica (new version), Doctor Who (new version), Mind of Mencia, Futurama, Mythbusters, Pushing Daisies, The Boondocks, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Robot Chicken, Torchwood, The Venture Bros. and Minoriteam. Rest in peace: Chappelle's Show, Star Trek, MST3K, Sledge Hammer, Police Squad, X-Files, Arrested Development, Ren & Stimpy, Politically Incorrect, Greg the Bunny, Cheap Seats, Max Headroom, Andy Richter Controls the Universe, Newsradio, Soap, Jericho, The 4400, Cheers, Moonlighting, Kids in the Hall, In Living Color and Sealab 2021, You Can't Do That on Television and Danger Mouse. And any Monty Python, Discovery/Learning/History/National Geographic Channel action, live severe weather coverage on the Weather Channel and Dick Vitale going cardiac on SportsCenter are pretty solid TV, too.



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Books:

What are those? Oh yeah. Sorry. Things you read. Either visionary fiction that makes you think or good non-fiction that any typical info junkie would appreciate: humor, history, archeology, science. Shakespeare, Edgar Allen Poe, H.G. Wells, Mark Twain, Ambrose Bierce, Robert Frost, Emily Dickinson, Molly Ivins and Hunter S. Thompson are among my prose and poetic inspirations. Oh, and I heard Maxim and FHM are literary masterpieces. Disagree? You might as well be unAmerican and be with the terrorists 8-P
Would you survive a zombie attack? Your Result: you're a zombie!

you were attacked,but luckily you escaped,only to find that one of those f---ers bit you!your friends decide to keep you as a pet,so you are now kept in a cage in your friend's basement living off of rats.


you're a surviver!
you're a zombie killin' god!
you're dead!
Would you survive a zombie attack?
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Heroes:

Me, of course. Then there's mi madre(RIP), the Rev. Jesse Jackson, Robert Kennedy, John F. Kennedy, Steve Jobs, Cesar Chavez, Mahatma Gandhi, David Robinson, Rosa Parks, the Rev. Martin Luther King, Mother Teresa, the genius behind the ESPN SportsCenter commercials, anyone who has the guts to try to sneak into Area 51 (we all know what they're REALLY hiding in there), and Rev. Michael Wood, my high school theology teacher, who wasn't your grandfather's theology teacher. In other words, really cool, brave, smart homosapiens. And hey, check out www.stewartcolbert2008.net. Hi-la-ri-ous. It could happen.


Witch South park character are you? Your Result: Stan You are a normal person you are not mean not very nice you are more nice then evil you care for your friends but not so much for those who makes your life a misery.


Kyle
Kenny
Cartman
Witch South park character are you?
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My Blog

Faster-than-light-take: No FTL movie reviews lately

I know. I've been sucking wind on movie reviews. Aside from the fact that I'm woefully behind on my big-screen experiences in 2008, I've lacked the adequate time to properly dissect all elements of ea...
Posted by Porthos Aurelius on Thu, 15 May 2008 10:31:00 PST

I drink your milkshake! Politically speaking...

WAY too much to cover here, so I'll be semi-relatively brief. First, evangelical king John Hagee apologized for his past harsh criticisms of the Catholic Church and for having "emphasized the darkest ...
Posted by Porthos Aurelius on Wed, 14 May 2008 11:29:00 PST

Opportunity knocked, and I finally answered the door

Some of you know that I've been promoted at work. Which means I actually took advantage of an opportunity. An opportunity that has presented itself time and again over the past eight years. What oppor...
Posted by Porthos Aurelius on Thu, 24 Apr 2008 11:02:00 PST

Inconvenient Truths

The dust is settling over the flap involving Barack Obama and his pastor at Trinity United Church of Christ in Chicago. The presidential hopeful delivered a rather stirring and generally well-received...
Posted by Porthos Aurelius on Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:45:00 PST

The deadly sins: Seven arent enough

As you all should know, when the trumpets blasted this morning at all corners of the earth, the Catholic Church announced another edict. Specifically, thE Vatican's Apostolic Penitentiary (slogan: "We...
Posted by Porthos Aurelius on Mon, 10 Mar 2008 12:54:00 PST

Double-standards and Catholicism (stop snickering at the redundancy here)

No doubt some San Antonians heard about this one. Archbishop Jose Gomez had some strong words for the local St. Mary's University when Hillary Clinton spoke there recently. Gomez expressed concern tha...
Posted by Porthos Aurelius on Wed, 20 Feb 2008 12:48:00 PST

Presidential Poppycock Part 1

Today is Fat Tuesday. So while Nawlins and other communities party up and get their debauchery on before Lent, it's also Super Tuesday (Tuesday, TUESDAY, TUESDAY!!!!  BE THERE!!!) This is when vo...
Posted by Porthos Aurelius on Tue, 05 Feb 2008 10:47:00 PST

Faster-Than-Light Take: U2-3D -- Love and Peace or Else

What else can I say? Listening to U2, one of the great rock bands of all time, is a pleasure. Watching U2 in concert (as I've done twice) is an adventure, nearly a life-changing, inspirational experie...
Posted by Porthos Aurelius on Tue, 29 Jan 2008 10:32:00 PST

Faster-Than-Light Take: I Know What Cloverfield Is!

Yes, this is directed at all the haters out there. The ones who deny that the movie actually met or even exceeded your expectations, but can't bring yourselves to admit as much. Rarely does a fil...
Posted by Porthos Aurelius on Fri, 25 Jan 2008 09:44:00 PST

As the World Turns

Aloha, my devoted, deluded followers ;-P This is one of infamous scattershot blogs. It goes all across the map, so bear with me. Operation Flip this Bachelor Pad/Turn a New Leaf is going along nicely....
Posted by Porthos Aurelius on Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:23:00 PST