That's easy..Pimpin...and I'm damn good at it...want proof, where's your kitty right now?? if she aint by yo side, she out givin up some hyde, then payin me,da beeyotch betta have my money, sheee-it...oh and, I aint yo damn kitty's baby daddy..let's get that straight right now..DNA test my azz...4-claws 4-Paws, you past that test first then you can ask me questions later...I tell u what, the only way to know fa sho if its my son...the moment he is born, he'll extend his claws slap his ma in the jaws, fire a hiss or 2 at you, then head down to the local bar and call me to come have a salty dogg, that's if I aint already there...sheee-it!!!
Well, to be quite honost, something you humans are NOT so good at...I'd like to meet about 9 more of me....that would give me 81 lives..then I could waste a few here and there on silly human stunts like komakazi piloting (dont you ever make fun of my spelling, hell I dont make fun of your face, and that's damn hilarious...sheee-it, plus, I can spell check, the only thing you can do bout your face is paint it, and remember,... paint makes em what they aint...oh and um, unlike us felines, you dont get better looking with age, you spend money putting your skin back onto your skull like it was when you was young) I'd also like to meet Garfield, so I can pimp his lazy azz in the hood, maybe down on the corner of 2nd Street and Up inya. I'm more interested in who wants to meet me rather than who I want to meet...shee-it I MEAT (spelled that way on purpose)WHOEVER I WANT..ya heard me?! Sheeee-it!!!
Well...I'm pretty much wrote Ted Nugents Cat Scratch Fever..so, I kinda like that...Stray Cat Strutt aint too bad either..The year of the Cat..but Without a doubt my favorite music is...Eminem since we share the same last name Slim Shady..Mustafa Shady..and he stole his attitude from me, but it's all good..shee-it.. By the way...that stupid song..Who Let The Dawgs Out..well it was ME of course..and I laughed my azz off as I watched em all get put into the Dawg pound....that shee-it was funny...ya heard me??? Shee-it, thats whassup!!!
Well, as you may very well know...Snoop Dawg and I got a new hit movie coming out featuring all my feline ho's...Be sure to see it..It's called Pussy Gone Wild!!! and it's da booooomb biatch!!!
Yes...I own about 3 or 4 of them..so what??? what about it? Oh, what do I watch....well, Animal Planet sometimes is ok,..Stupid pet tricks on David Letterman is hilarious, you'll see dogs do absolutely anything stupid..thats why they sleep outdoors while I curl up on satin and silk sheets on my Gold and Platinum plated diamond studded water bed...hell, a pimp gotta feel the motion of the ocean at all times, even when sleepin...ya heard me???
Books?? Are you friggin kiddin me...books are for dogs, for when you humans are silly enough to let them try and stay inside one night, and they have no class..they pee all over your kitchen..thats when your books come in handy to cover the damn pee spots with pages and pages..then take the hard cover that's left and whack em upside they heads...right before they go doo doo on your freshly steam cleaned white crushed velvet carpet...
Me..then..me again....and when I really put this one to thought, it's still me...MJ(Grand Master Marty Jannetty) is after that, then Snoop Dogg..then...me again. what?