WISH....................................................... I WISH I'D OF NEVER MET YOU... HELD YOUR HAND...HAD SEX... SEEMS TO ME... THE MEMORIES LINGER IN REGRET... THE PROMISE TIL DEATH... THE FEELINGS I GET... LIKE A BULLET TO THE HEAD... OFTEN WORDS I WHISPERED... MAKE NO SENSE... OFTEN YOUR PRESENCE... WASN'T EXPECTED LIKE THIS... IN PAST TENSE... I WISH I'D OF NEVER MET YOU... FELT YOUR EYES... AS WE KISSED... SOMETHING IN ME DIED... BUT I DON'T REMEMBER IT... FEELS LIKE FLESH... BUT DIFFERENT... AND WHEN I REMEMBER WHO I AM... I WANNA FORGET... I JUST WANNA RUN FOR A FUCKIN DISTANCE... GET TO SOME POINT I NEVER EXSISTED... WITHOUT QUESTION... I WISH I'D OF NEVER MET YOU... HELD YOUR HAND...HAD SEX... SEEMS THE THINGS I REMEMBER... TEND TO LEAD TO REGRET... AND THE PLACES THAT I ENTER... THERE IS SOMETHING... THAT IS WHISPERED... THAT I NEVER QUITE GET... AND THE WAY I AM FEELING... YOU SHOULDN'T MESS WITH... THERES THINGS... THAT SHOULD JUST BE LEFT... I SHOULD NEVER FORGET... I WISH I'D OF NEVER MET YOU... HELD YOU HAND...HAD SEX... A SILENCE SEEMS TO LINGER... THAT FEELS LIKE FLESH... A HUNGER I REMEMBER... THAT NEVER RELENTS... WHO ARE YOU TO KILL ME... TOOK MY PLACE INSTEAD... WHY DO I LIKE TO LINGER... IN WHATS LEFT... AND WHY ARE ALL THESE... FUNNY VOICES FUCKIN WITH MY HEAD... AND WHY ARE YOU STILL IN MY BED... I WISH I'D OF NEVER MET YOU... HELD YOU HAND...HAD SEX....I EXPECT TO BE SLAUGHTERED FOR THIS ONE...OH YEAHSOMETHING............................................... ............................................................ ............................................................ . Date: 05/09/2007YOUR CAUGHT UP IN FUCKED UP... POOR OL PITY FUCKIN ME... SAY THE SHIT TONGUE IN CHEEK... WHAT DO I DO... TO SILENCE SOME OF YOUR SCREAMS... WHATS WAKING UP GOING TO BRING... MAN IF EYES COULD FUCKIN SPEAK... THEY'D BE MAKIN A MEAL OF ME... SUDDENLY SEEMS EMPTY... SHOULD I JUST LEAVE... MAYBE YOUR INSAINITY... IS ALWAYS QUESTIONING ME? BLAME IT ON THE WINDOW... OUTSIDE WHERE HUMANS BEING... WANDERING OUT IN THE AIR I BREATHE... BET THEY'D LIKE TO KNOW... THE BULLSHIT THAT WE THINK... SUDDENLY FRIENDS BECOME... SOME FUCKED UP ENEMIES... AND THEN YA LIVE WHAT THAT MEANS... TALKIN SHIT LIKE LIL JUNKIES... FUCKED UP LIL NOTHINGS... WASTED MY DAY ON ALOT OF BULLSHIT THINGS... TO BAD YA LIL BITCHES HAD TO GET IN MY FUCKIN WAY... CAUGHT UP IN THE VERY WORDS YA HAD TO SAY... HOW ABOUT YOU RUN YOUR LIPS... IN MORE PLEASING WAYS... SEE I THINK ITS OKAY... TO BE A LIL DERANGED... TO FUCK SOME SHIT UP... WHEN IT GETS IN MY FACE... YOUR CAUGHT UP...IN ALL KINDS OF FUCKED UP... POOR OL PITY THE FUCK OUT OF ME... SAY THE SHIT KINDA TONGUE IN CHEEK... I DON'T THINK MY INSAINITY'S THAT WEAK... ITS TO PROTECTING... ALL EMBRACING... IT SPEAKS MY NAME...NEVER IN SHAME... IT NEVER HATES ME... NEVER SAYS MAKE ME... LOOK AT THE TIME... WE SPENT WASTING... ALL THIS IS... IS LIKE IT WAS NOTHING... ALL THIS IS... IS LIKE IT WAS NOTHING... I'M ABOUT TO MAKE IT SOMETHING....
SAVED....................................................... ............................................................ .........................................................THE DAY IS DEAD... THATS IT... ALL THERE IS... DID YA GET YOUR REVENGE... DID YA FEED YOUR SHIT... AM I IN SOME OF YOUR SUFFERING... DID I GET FUCKED WITHOUT A KISS... AM I JUST BEING MOLESTED... A PIECE OF SKIN... HAS YOUR DRUG BEEN INJECTED... YOU WERE ONCE DISGUSTING... AND I NEED FORGIVED?FUCK YOU... YOU AIN'T SAVIN' SHIT... I HAVE NOTHIN LEFT IN ME... I HAVE NOTHIN TO GIVE... AND YOU AIN'T SAVED SHIT... THE DAY IS DEAD... THAT WAS IT... DID YA GET YOUR REVENGE... DID YA FEED YOUR SHIT? AM I YOUR ENEMY... TELL THE TRUTH ONCE BITCH... IS MY EYE BLACK AGAIN... ITS JUST FUCKIN SKIN... AS DEAD AS THAT IS... PROMISE ME A KISS... FROM YOUR BLOW JOB LIPS... RAISE ME ABOVE ALL EVIL... AND DROWN ME IN YOUR SHIT... I'LL BE THE VICTIM... I'LL SUFFER THRU IT... I'LL REACH TO BE FORGIVED... THIS IS HOW I'LL LIVE... AND WHEN I GET TO WERE I'M GOIN... I'LL TRY TO FORGET... I'M GOOD AT PRETEND... THE DAY IS DEAD... THAT WAS IT... DID YA GET YOUR REVENGE... DID YA FEED YOUR SHIT? DID YOU TASTE WHAT YOU WERE CRAVING... LICK YOUR LIPS AND DIG RIGHT IN? FUCKING THE FLESH TO BRUISE THE SKIN... THE TRUTH KILLS IN THE END... AND I DON'T BELIEVE... YOUR SAVING SHIT PLEASE...................................................... ..........................................................
WAIT........................................................ ............................................................ .........................................................HEL D MY BREATH... FOR THINGS... WAITED FOR EVERYTHING... TO COME CRUMBLING... INSIDE THERES SUFFERING... DOES IT MAKE ME WEAK... I UNDER ESTIMATED ME... I THINK I CAN BREATH... HATING YOU... GAVE ME STENGTH... YOU WAIT... YOU WAIT... YOU SEE... YOU SEE... IN THE MIRROR... LOOK AT HERE... SO MUCH HAUNTING... SO MUCH WANTING... SO MUCH DISPAIR... LOOK BITCH... LOOK RIGHT THERE... LOOK BITCH... LOOK RIGHT THERE... EVERYONE THINKS THEY SEE... THE DEAD INSIDE O ME... EVERYONE THINKS THEY MEAN... EVERYTHING... YOU THINK... YOU SEE... PRETTY THINGS... PRETTY DEMEANED... PRETTY... LEAVE... I THINK I HATE YOU... WAIT... WAIT... AND SEE... AND SEE... I DON'T MIND... BEING POISON INSIDE... I DON'T MIND... LOOKIN YOU IN THE EYE... DENIED... DENIED... WHY... AND I DON'T THINK I... MIND BEING HATED... I FEEL THE MOST LOVED... WHEN I'M WASTED... CAN YOU TASTE IT... THE THINGS YOUR FACED WITH... ON MY KNEES MY SAVIOUR... I'M TAINTED... LIFT MY SPIRITS... TOO MAYBE... I AM THE THINGS... YOUR THINKING... FOUND ME BREATH TAKING... SLEEPLESS NIGHTS... ALWAYS WAITING... YOUR A SLUT... THATS FRUSTRATING... FUCK YOU... ANOTHER REASON TO HATE ME... I GOT DRUGS TO SAVE ME... WAIT... WAIT... I GOT DRUGS... WHISPER IN MY EAR... TELL ME HOW YOU FUCKED ME... YOUR FINGERS THRU MY HAIR... EVERYTHINGS FUCKED... EVERYWHERE... AND I FUCKED YOU THERE... MAYBE IT WAS HEAVEN... THAT PUT YOU THRU HELL... THATS WHAT I KEEP TELLIN MYSELF... TELLIN MYSELF... HOW YOUR DEALIN WITH THE DEAD... SAME SHIT SAME END... JUST A NEW DEMENTED TWIST... LOOK AT ME LOOKIN AT YOU AGAIN... ISN'T THAT SICK... JUST AS SICK... AS ITS ALWAYS BEEN... REPULSED... WITHIN... LICKIN MY LIPS... LIKE A DOPE ADDICT... LICKIN MY LIPS... LIKE I'M HUNGRY AGAIN... I GET MY KICKS... BEATIN MYSELF TO SHIT... CUZ SHE LOVES ME AGAIN... CUZ SHE LOVES ME AGAIN... AND I THINK... SOMETIMES I'M HER BITCH... AND THATS JUST SICK... THATS JUST SICK... WAIT... AND HERE I SIT... DRAWING LINES ON MY WRIST... DON'T MIND ME... I'M JUST ANGRY AGAIN... ITS IN THE SKIN... ITS WHO I AM... AND YOU LOVE ME... CUZ YOU WANTED TO FUCK ME... WAIT AND SEE...WAIT.................................................. ..........................................................MO RE LYRICS FROM....THE SICK MIND OF ME THE ONE AND ONLY DOPE FUCKIN THERAPY...JANUARY 26...2007 FOR ALL THOSE...YEAH ALL THOSE...LOVE YA.........................................................
AS HIGH AS THIS...............................JUST WHERE HAVE YOUR LIPS BEEN??? TO LEARN TO TALK SO... MUCH FUCKIN SHIT... I BEEN FUCKED A FEW TIMES... BUT NOTHING QUITE LIKE THIS... DEMENTED PLACES OF PRETEND... SHE DOES SOME DRUGS... THEN SAY SHE'S CLEAN... BEEN DOWN A FEW TIMES... VISITING THE GUTTER... JUST TO SEE WHAT IT MEANS... PLAYIN JUST A LIL.... OUT OF THE LEAGUE... I'M NOT SURE WHAT I'M FUCKIN WITH... BUT ITS A LIL EXCITING... ALL IN WHAT FOOLS BELIEVE... LIL PHYSCO SHIT... DIGGIN OUT THE TRASH... JUST TO SEE WHATS TO EAT... THE WAY THE SLEAZE... PLEASES ME... GOTTA GRIT MY TEETH... A LIL FUCKED UP PLEASURE... IN AGONY.... SOME SHIT IS JUST FUCKIN TOO TEMPTING... A DRUG ADDICT WAITING... A SLUT BEGGING... MY FINGERS SCRAPING... JUST WHERE HAVE THOSE LIPS BEEN... TO LEARN TO TALK SO... MUCH SHIT... PUT YOUR MONEY WHERE YOUR MOUTH IS... AND SUCK ON THIS... ARE YOU REALLY EVIL... OR IS IT JUST A GIFT... COME HERE YA LIL BITCH... I GOT A FEW THINGS TO SHOW YA AGAIN... SOMETHINGS YA MIGHT NOT... OF EVER DID... BUT YOU'LL WANT TO AGAIN... THE LIL PIECES... THAT MAKE THE LUNACY FIT... JUST SOMETHINGS YOU MIGHT NEVER ADMIT... BUT THE TRUTH IS... ITS ALL READY WRITTEN... ITS WHERE YA BEEN... AND A JUNKIE NEVER QUITS... JUST THROWS THERE LIL FITS... GET A LIL FUCKED UP TO... TAKE CARE OF IT... I DIDN'T GET THIS WAY... ALL BY ACCIDENT... I LIKED THE WAY I PLAYED... I BEEN HALF DEAD... JUST TO RISE ABOVE... AND DO IT ALL A FUCKINGAIN... TALKIN SMACK WITH MY LIL FRIENDS... WHO CARRY ME THRU... TIL I FIND THE END... SO MUCH SHITS... GOT TO BE DEALT WITH... THAT ESCAPES FROM WITHIN... BUT FUCK IT... THATS IRRELEVANT... GET YOUR LIPS BACK WHERE THEY SHOULD OF BEEN... I GOT SOMETHING TO BURY IN... WHERE'D YA LEARN TO TALK... SO MUCH FUCKIN SHIT... YOU MUST BE SUICIDAL... I'M CONVINCED YOU WANT DEAD... NOT EVEN WORRIED IN THE SLIGHTEST BIT... LICKIN YOUR LIPS... IMPRESS ME AGAIN... HOW GOOD OF DRUGS CAN YOU GET... CUZ I NEED TO BE...WHERE I'VE NEVER BEEN...UHM...NOT SURE PEOPLE...BUT UHM YEAH HERE IT IS
WINDOW...................................................... ............................................................ .........................................................MY MOMMA ONCE TOLD ME... THAT THE UGLY FUCKERS... SEEM SO PERFECT... AND YOU'D NEVER CATCH... THEM BY THE WINDOW... NO... THEY KEPT THEM CLOSED... CUZ IT WAS THE DRUGS YA KNOW... AND YA GET TO GETTIN PAST... WHAT YA MIGHT THINK YA KNOW... AND YA CATCH THE CRUMBLING... OF THE PLACE YA CALLED HOME... THE AGONY OF REALIZING ITS COLD... THE SINCERITY OF BEING ALONE... WHEN YA CLOSE YOUR WINDOW... AND DADDY HE WAS ACCUSTOMED... TO ALWAYS SAYIN FUCK US... AND GO BUY YOUR OWN BAG OF DOPE... AND YOU SEE YOURSELF... CUZ FUCK YES YOU'D KNOW... THAT JESUS WAS SOMETIMES... YOUR ONLY HOPE... AND YA CAN SEE THE RAINBOW... BUT THERE AIN'T NO GOLD... YOU VIEW GETS HOLLOW... YOUR NEEDS GET SHALLOW... YOU CLOSE YOUR WINDOW.... YOU CLOSE YOUR WINDOW.... WATCH THE GIRLS SKIP SOME ROPE... WATCH THE SUN MELT THE SNOW... WATCH THE POLICE OUTSIDE THE WINDOW... AND BABY SHE ONCE SAID TO ME... FOR BEING BEAUTIFUL... YOU CAN BE FUCKIN UGLY... YOU EVER SEE YOUR SELF... WHEN YOU SEE... YOUR NEED TO BE ABSORBED... IN THESE THINGS... THAT INVOLVE WEED... YOUR SO FUCKIN UGLY... YOU SHOULD SEE... WHEN YOUR MEAN... AND BABY SHE ONCE SAID TO ME... YOU ONCE STOLE THE SOUL I NEED... SUCKED INTO YOUR BULLSHIT... APATHY... DIDN'T YA EVER HEAR ME SPEAK... WEREN'T YA LISTENING... TO ME... YOU FREAK... AND ON MY KNEES... SEEMS GOD HAD TO SAY TO ME... BELIEVE... OPEN YOUR WINDOW.... LET IN SOME HOPE.... YOU'LL REALIZE YOU GOT SOME TIME... TO TRY... TO FIND SOME PEACES OF YOUR LIFE... YA LET SLIP BEHIND...................................................... ............................................................ .........................................................TOT ALLY INSPIRED BY MY FRIENDSHIP WITH KILL THE ENEMY...DON'T ASK ME WHY...BUT I FELT HIS PRESENSE BESIDE ME AS I WROTE IT...ITS GETTING KINDA EERRRIE ............................................................ .......................................................... YEAH I GOT A GOD.....TALK TO ME... YEAH...SPEAK YOUR FUCKIN PEACE... SET SOME DEMONS FREE... I'M ON THE EDGE... FUCKIN NEED SOME RELIEF... MAY GOD FORGIVE... THE THOUGHTS IN ME YEAH I GOT A GOD... HE DOESN'T BELIEVE IN SHIT... ITS A CREATED MISERY... A WOUNDED TYPE SCREAM... TIME TO THINK ABOUT THINGS... TIME SOMETHINGS WERE REPLACED... TIRED OF REACHIN BEYOND MY MEANS... TO LOSE THE FUCKIN THINGS I NEED... I HAVE SO MUCH HATE AND DISCONTENT... YOU NEVER UNDERSTOOD ANY OF THAT SHIT... LIKE I OWE YOU SOMETHING... LIKE I GET FRUSTRATING... LIKE I KNOW WHAT I DID... BUT THERE WAS NO DIFFERENCE... LIKE SHITS SUPPOSE TO MAKE SENSE... IS IT SOMETHING YOU DID... THAT I DIDN'T FUCKIN GET... WAS THE DRUGS THE CURE FOR IT... WANNA FUCK FOR A MOMENT... AND GET AWAY FROM ME... WANNA INFEST IN THE DEAD IN ME... AND PRAY MY GOD FORGIVES...
REASONS..................................................... ..........................................................YO U GOT ME CAUGHT UP... IN THE FUCKED UP WAY YA THINK... I'M LOST WITH OUT MY REASONS... ITS SUCH A TEMPTING PLACE TO PLAY... COMATOSE IN SO MANY WAYS... BUT I WANNA BE BURIED HERE... LOOKING AT YOUR FACE... SEEING WHAT THERE IS TO YOU... THAT LEAVES ME DRAINED... YOU GOT ME FUCKED UP... IN THE FUCKED UP WAYS YA THINK... THE FEELINGS YOU HUNGER... THAT CRAVES SO MUCH HATE... THE FORBIDDEN INSIDE... THATS NEVER BEEN RAPED... THAT YOU KEEP TO YOURSELF... ALL NICE AND FUCKIN SAFE... THE FREAK I CAN'T TAME... THE BITCH IN ME YOU MIGHT OF SAVED... BET YA FIND THAT COMFORTING... IN SOME DISGUSTING WAYS... I BET YA'D LIKE TO DEPRIVE ME.. OF SO MANY THINGS... BUT I'LL FIND YOU THERE... WHEN I SAY YOUR NAME... YOU GOT ME FUCKED UP... IN THESE WAYS YA THINK... I'M LOST WITHOUT MY REASONS... IN A TEMPTING PLACE TO PLAY... COMATOSE IN SO MANY FUCKIN WAYS... SEEMS LIKE I LIKE TO CLING... TO DESPERATE THINGS... I TRIED TO ESCAPE ONE DAY... LIVE IN WHAT WAS ONCE... A YESTURDAY... AND THERE STARRIN AT ME... WAS MY EYES WITHOUT A FACE... A LIL DARKNESS I DIDN'T CREATE... BUT INFESTING ALL THE SAME... BUT YOU FOUND ME THERE... JUST WHEN I THOUGHT I WAS SAFE... IT WAS MINE... MY LIL PLACE... BUT NOW ITS A MEMORY... THAT JUST REMAINS... CUZ I'M CAUGHT UP IN... THE FUCKED UP WAYS YA THINK... BUT NOW I SEE SOME REASONS... YOU HAD SOMETHING LEFT TO SAY... SOMETHING TO CREATE CHANGE... A PERFECT FUCKED UP PLACE... WHERE ALL THAT REMAINS... IS US LIEIN AWAKE... DEPRAVED ENOUGH TO PRAY... ABOUT SOME STUPID BULLSHIT THING... THAT JUST WENT TO WASTE... I GOT YOU IN MY EYES... JADED SOMEWHAT I THINK... BUT THATS OKAY...I KINDA LIKE THE... WAY YOU THINK... THE DAMAGE IT COULD BRING... I HAVE MY REASONS TO DO THESE THINGS.. I LOST MY SOUL.. IT NEEDS REPLACED... AND I LIKE THE FUCKED UP WAY YA THINK... I FOUND MY REASON