Haj profile picture

Haj

Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way aroun

About Me

hello. my name is haj. { haj is short for hajime } hajime is a japanese name. why i have a japanese name i will never know. i suppose my parents thought that my life would be too easy living in kalihi and being teased as the little fat boy with a funny name was a way to build character. i may have a traumatized inner-child. i am okinawan, not japanese. i am constantly reminded that there is a difference. i really don't have time nowadays to update this thing. i have great friends. despite knowing a lot about me, they are STILL my friends. that says a lot about their character. either that or they are just as fracked up as i am. "a lot" is two words. i will use it a lot here. i TRY not to use profanity unless someone throws something at me or hits me up-side the head. i have no money. i am broke, but not poor. hey... I AM A FUNNY FELLER. I'M ACTUALLY NOT THAT FUNNY. BUT I WILL MAKE YOU LAUGH. YOU ARE A BODAGGIT AND I SHOULD BUST YUR COCCYX IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO KNOW ME! i am a droper-out'er. i am an astronomy drop-out. i am a mathematics drop-out. i am a criminal justice drop-out. and a {insert whatever frickin' major here} drop out. "drop" is a wierd word if you say it a lot. i read a lot. i write a lot. i speak japanese. i Mozilla Firefox instead of crappy internet explorer. i h8te taxes. i
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I AM ALMOST 79.689947% EMO!
Holy gee whilikers... I am ALMOST as emo as it gets... I will try to cheer the heck up and stop wiping my nose on my sweater... Take the EMO test at Fuali.com

My Interests

AIM = "haj4president"

i miss my old working place...

I'd like to meet:

only people i know.....

Music:

Hitler + Illegally Modified Xbox360 console + a banned Xbox Live Account = Some Funny Shit

Movies:

The picture below utilizes a breakthrough in computer monitor technology called "Scratch N' Sniff, version 1.0". Go ahead and "scratch n' sniff" your screen! It's a wonderful scent! Guess the smell and you could win a cup of coffee or something!!! LUCKY!!!

Books:

Any and all, and all the time. to Artie Miller, goodbye old friend...

My Blog

Heartbroken Bush Runs After Departing Rove’s Car

WASHINGTON, DC  -  A confused President Bush broke free from the restraint of Secret Service agents and ran in pursuit of departing deputy chief of staff Karl Rove's car for several blocks d...
Posted by Haj on Thu, 30 Aug 2007 11:15:00 PST

Michael Moore Honored With New Ben & Jerry’s Flavor

BURLINGTON, VT  -  Ben & Jerry's, the Vermont-based ice-cream manufacturer known for its progressive social mission, held a press conference Monday to introduce a new flavor celebrating ...
Posted by Haj on Fri, 24 Aug 2007 05:51:00 PST

Report: Iran Less Than 10 Years Away From 2016

WASHINGTON, DC  -  According to an alarming new Department of Defense report combining civilian, military, and calendric evidence, Iran may be as few as nine years away from the year 2016. ...
Posted by Haj on Mon, 13 Aug 2007 09:46:00 PST

Minimum-Wage Hike Celebrated With Name-Brand Ketchup

WASHINGTON, DC - Two weeks after the hourly federal minimum wage was raised from $5.15 to $5.85, families across the country were still celebrating the historic increase by running their electric fans...
Posted by Haj on Sun, 12 Aug 2007 11:23:00 PST

Heroic Computer Dies To Save World From Master's Thesis

WALTHAM, MA  A courageous young notebook computer committed a fatal, self-inflicted execution error late Sunday night, selflessly giving its own life so that professors, academic advisors, classmates...
Posted by Haj on Thu, 02 Aug 2007 09:11:00 PST

Counselors Quarantine Homesick Campers

CAMP WALLALONGABANKA, MN  Counselors at Wallalongabanka Sleep-Away Camp say a potentially dangerous outbreak of homesickness has been contained in Mallard Cabin, where campers infected by "sudden acu...
Posted by Haj on Thu, 02 Aug 2007 09:08:00 PST

Majority of Parents Abuse Children, Children Report

LOS ANGELES  A chilling national poll of U.S. children ages 3 through 12 estimated that nearly 75 million youngsters suffer both physical and psychological abuse at the hands of their parents on a da...
Posted by Haj on Fri, 29 Jun 2007 05:27:00 PST

Rocky II, III, IV Decisions Overturned After Stallone Caught With Performance-Enhancing Drugs

PHILADELPHIA - In the wake of last month's shocking revelation that actor Sylvester Stallone had been caught with the illegal human growth hormone Jintropin at an Australian airport, the World Boxing ...
Posted by Haj on Wed, 06 Jun 2007 01:11:00 PST

5.22.07 - Letter D Pulls Sponsorship from Sesame Street...

Noted Consonant Alienated by Controversial New Gay MuppetNEW YORK - A spokesperson for the letter D announced Monday that the consonant is withdrawing sponsorship from Sesame Street following a Childr...
Posted by Haj on Wed, 23 May 2007 05:09:00 PST

Revelers Chow Down at Testicle Festival

Wisconsinites have become experts in deep-frying food, including cheese curds, candy bars and Twinkies. They now have livestock testicles to add to the list. More than 300 people paid $5 for all-you-c...
Posted by Haj on Thu, 17 May 2007 04:30:00 PST