Tha Guru

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Everyday, every few minutes we lose someone to senseless violence,whether it be due to an argument gone bad, an act of revenge, infidelity, selfinflicted, or being under the influence of a mind altering drug. So with thatbeing said, here’s the point that changed my life….It’s 4:00 in the morning, and I’m drunk, driving down the curvaceousdark back roads with-out a streetlight for miles. Thinking that I’m smoothby trying to avoid police, as well as other drivers. My nerves are shot as Irapidly approach what seems to be a malnutricined brown german shepherdlying in the middle of the road. Nearly hitting the starved homeless animal, Iswerve to avoid fatality, weather it be mine or his due to my drunken state ofmind I nearly lose control, then finally, shaking it off and getting a hold ofmyself I continue to push the powder-like sky blue Toyota Camry Icontinue my jorney home; but it was then that I realized that something isnot right. Seconds later I approach my destination. HOME. Stumbling to thedoor hoping and praying that I don’t Fall: yet making a vow to God that Iwill never drink again, I fumble with my keys trying to get inside, and to thekitchen. Where I will then try to coat my churning stomach with grease, andfatty foods all the while trying not to awake my family. Thinking to myselfthat I’m quietly getting pots and pans out of the cabinets, tip toeing aroundusing only the lights from the stove and refrigerator; I awaken my youngerbrother Lando to strange yet drunk noises from the kitchen… The kind thatyou know that someone’s not in their right state of mind yet convincingthemselves that their just fine. He walked in and turned the light on saying“What the hell are you doing?” startled. I stumbled nearly falling on thestove that I had forgotten to preheat thank God.He just shook his head as he said laughing… “Man I’m going back tobed…”On with my mission of defeating this hideous monster called theafter-effects of drinking. I grab some bologna from the fridge, and throw itin the 6 pound black cast iron pan like grandma used to have, along withsome cooking grease and turn the stove on high. Thinking to myself, I couldutilize my time and get the bread out along with the Miracle Whip SaladDressing and actually dress my bread, so as I’m getting my things togetherAlong with the cooking utensils, I grab some Velvetta Cheese slices tothrow on my bologna and sit them to the side.Constantly turning and flipping the meat in the now steaming hot and loudPan I’m not really realizing that it’s almost 5:00 in the morning I add mycheese and melt it nicely while my eyes are feasted on the smokey, yetgolden black bologna I then continue to construct my medicine or SuperSandwich.After devouring that in less than all of 3 minutes I sit to smoke acigarette and catch an episode of cops when I feel myself dosing off as I’mthen awaken by a phone call.Immediately I’m thinking that this can’t be good. Nervous andshaking I timidly answer the phone in a weakening voice… “Hello”“Tell me it’s not true!” came screeching from the other end of thereceiver. “Please Chris… Please tell me that Mark’s not dead!” Silence tookover my whole being. Calmly I collected myself in my drunken, nowsomewhat full state of mind. I said “Relax, just cool out, calm down, calmdown… no Mark’s not dead, I was just with him earlier tonight.” in my mostsoothing tone, trying to convince myself that this tragedy’s just a dream andI’ll wake up at any minute now; But sure enough, what was I had hoped tobe a nightmare is true. My cousin is gone now due to another sinceless actthat we all perform… By the graces of God, I wasn’t included in this one-way trip to infinity, but easily, it could have been me as well…. Driving…In my drunken state of mind.