Max Fischer profile picture

Max Fischer

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me

I’m Max Fischer. I’m a former student of Rushmore Academy, which I recently got expelled from. This is my first time joining an online social community, and I know you probably think I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth, but I’m no elitist. I think it’s a great facilitator, and I’m really looking forward to making the most of it here on Myspace. One footnote, I notice that there is no fencing group. Well, I’m going to try my hardest to start one up for you guys.When I was younger I wrote a play, a little one act about Watergate. My mother read it and thought I should go to Rushmore. The headmaster agreed and I was soon enrolled. As a student there I was involved in many extracurriculars. Maybe I spent too much time starting up clubs and putting on plays, because in my final year at Rushmore I was placed on academic probation. Despite the pressure of looming expulsion, I saved Latin and was able to plan a world-class aquarium where students could observe marine species in their natural habitats. I also befriended Mr. Herman Blume and Miss Cross, a first grade teacher at Rushmore whom I inadvertently fell in love with. A misunderstanding over the aquarium plans – not academics – led to my immediate expulsion at the hands of Dr. Guggenheim, which in turn led to a dark period in my life: I attended Grover Cleveland High School, became estranged to my best friend Dirk Calloway, and discovered that Miss Cross and Mr. Blume went skinny dipping in Mr. Blume’s pool and gave each other hand jobs while I was out front taking a nap. This led to a bitter feud between Mr. Blume and I, a feud that was not fully resolved until the opening night of my most personal play to date, Heaven and Hell.The future is bright. My top schools where I want to apply to are Oxford and The Sorbonne; Harvard is my safety.

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

Edward Applebee and Jacques-Yves Cousteau

My Blog

This Week in not Max Fischer (7/10/06)

The Overthrow of the Toyota Regime Partly a result of my lack of funding,  partly owing to my increased tendency towards unfulfilled obligations, partly a manifestation of my Dutch heritage, and ...
Posted by on Mon, 10 Jul 2006 14:46:00 GMT

This Week in Jonathan - Don't Kill Me; It's my birthday

GD Rapids Joan Didion, in her excellent essay "The White Album," describes her growing unease living in 1960s L.A., subtly paralleling her paranoia and her generation's movement from innocence to e...
Posted by on Mon, 19 Jun 2006 17:55:00 GMT

This Week in Jonathan - The Week of the Filibuster

For me, this week was like a filibuster: I engaged in lots of internal dialogue, but accomplished very little.  These are the only two highlights:    * I decided to compare my week...
Posted by on Sun, 11 Jun 2006 17:06:00 GMT

This Week in Jonathan 06/05

I think my body is trying to tell me something.  For the second straight weekend I took a holiday only to have it soured by my poor health.  Last weekend, a cold stamped out the sunlight up ...
Posted by on Mon, 05 Jun 2006 07:47:00 GMT

This Week in Jonathan - Memorial Day Edicion

Sick Days pt. 1 Last Week of Work This week saw slip away the last realistic possibility of gainful employment for yours truly.  With school kids due to be released in the next week, sub...
Posted by on Tue, 30 May 2006 14:07:00 GMT

This Week in Jonathan 5/21/06

This week in Jonathan was exhaustingly normal-person like.  I worked five straight days.  Sometimes the real world can be so stiffling, seemingly demanding fake smiles and daily naps.  ...
Posted by on Sun, 21 May 2006 08:18:00 GMT

Inclement Weather

The inclement weather may force a cancellation of the ballin'. 70% chance according to the weather nazis at tv 8.
Posted by on Fri, 12 May 2006 15:17:00 GMT

B-Ball Saturday 5/13

Unroll the tube socks and dust off your Air Force One's:  this Saturday the rock will be thrown down, the hoop will be shot at, and once in a while the ball will probably go through the rim! ...
Posted by on Wed, 10 May 2006 06:54:00 GMT

Religious News Satire

A few months ago Rusty and I were discussing various get-rich-or-at-least-internet-famous schemes and he touched upon the idea of a religious news parody sight done in the fashion of a gossip blog.&nb...
Posted by on Mon, 01 May 2006 13:34:00 GMT

This Week in Jonathan

This week in Jonathan was a painful week.  For several months I have been ignoring the increasingly obvious fact that one of my wisdom teeth was coming in, but not exactly in the right direction....
Posted by on Sun, 30 Apr 2006 11:27:00 GMT